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Serving ex

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7

7kids2parents

Member
What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? IL
I am getting ready to file to modify custody of my son. She has changed jobs and is working in a bar 5 nights a week from 5pm til 1am. She recently got remarried after dating the guy for 1 week. (She had a different guy living with her up until 1 week before she got married) They got married on the day that his divorce was finalized, which happened to be our son's 8th birthday. She had called me and asked if I would keep our son because she had to work and wanted him to be with a parent on his birthday. Well instead she got married.

Anyway, when she informed me that she was working those hours, 5 nights a week, I asked her if our son could come to my house after school and stay with me since she wasn't home, and he could go back to her on Tuesdays and Wednesdays (her days off). This way I could help him with homework and stuff (as I've said before he is a little slow and needs extra help). I told her no child support would have to change or anything. She refused. She said that she would have to pay the babysitter anyway if my son was there or not. She has 2 other kids by 2 other dads. She has a 17 year old sitting with the kids after school until she gets home. New guy works nights as well so he's not home either.

First question: Wouldn't it be in the best interest of the child to be with a parent instead of a babysitter?

Second question: My ex has an attorney on retainer. When I file, do I need to have her served or do I send the paperwork to her attorney?
 


M

mybrood

Member
My husband is going through a similar situation and to cover all bases he is having kiddo's mom served by the sheriff's department and also sending papers to her lawyer.

I hope this is a little more helpful than TheGeekness.
 
Just Blue

Just Blue

Senior Member
mybrood said:
My husband is going through a similar situation and to cover all bases he is having kiddo's mom served by the sheriff's department and also sending papers to her lawyer.

I hope this is a little more helpful than TheGeekness.
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Interesting.:rolleyes:


#1 02-07-2011, 01:13 PM
mybrood
Member Join Date: Oct 2010
Posts: 32

Change in circumstance?

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Illinois

If the custodial parent is working 5 nights a week from 4pm til 2am, is that enough change in circumstance for a non custodial parent to file for change in custody?

If not is there anything that can be done where the non custodial parent can say that the child should spend these nights with the night with them rather than a babysitter or step parrent?

Does it matter that the child's grades have begun dropping from A's to C's since the custodial parent is not home when the child gets home from school to help with homework?
Click to expand...
 
M

mybrood

Member
Yep that is my post. The difference in our circumstances is that mom is working at the hospital Sunday through Thursday, not for sure doing what. But mom is still not there for kiddo 5 days a week and we have him 3 weekends a month as it is. My hubby was just going to ask for ROFR then he found out that the new shift could be a change in circumstance. We also found out why his grades are slipping, he's not doing any of his homework cause mom's not there to check it.
 
Just Blue

Just Blue

Senior Member
mybrood said:
Yep that is my post. The difference in our circumstances is that mom is working at the hospital Sunday through Thursday, not for sure doing what. But mom is still not there for kiddo 5 days a week and we have him 3 weekends a month as it is. My hubby was just going to ask for ROFR then he found out that the new shift could be a change in circumstance. We also found out why his grades are slipping, he's not doing any of his homework cause mom's not there to check it.
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Yeah..Sure**************.:rolleyes:
 
7

7kids2parents

Member
Update

I wanted to give an update. My ex and I went to court and were ordered to do mediation (which I figured would happen). We go back to court in 15 days.

I am wondering if the fact that she got married to a man on the day his divorce was finalized will look as tacky to the judge as it does to me? Or will it not really matter at all? Will it matter that this marriage took place on our son's birthday (he was with me at the time)?
 
I

Isis1

Senior Member
7kids2parents said:
I wanted to give an update. My ex and I went to court and were ordered to do mediation (which I figured would happen). We go back to court in 15 days.

I am wondering if the fact that she got married to a man on the day his divorce was finalized will look as tacky to the judge as it does to me? Or will it not really matter at all? Will it matter that this marriage took place on our son's birthday (he was with me at the time)?
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it will not matter. he was legally allowed to marry as he was divorced. unless there is a law that stated your are not allowed to get married on a child's birthday, it will not matter.
 
M

mistoffolees

Senior Member
7

7kids2parents

Member
Another update

Well had mediation and court with the ex. Just thought I'd let everyone know how it all turned out.

I ended up getting my son 4 days each week plus my 3 weeks in the summer and the holiday and birthday stuff that was in our original papers. In addition custody changed and I am now the custodial parent and she is the ncp. She also has to pay me child support.
 
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