custody issues and how to handle

[novemberbride]

The tired couple is back.

I read through your post, and didn't see a legal question. However, it's clear you have lot's of concerns, especially about how the volunteers on this forum have responded to you.

In your first two threads, I tried to give you advice. Also, I gave your wife advice, even though she wasn't entitled to it. Now you want to come back to complain yet again about the advice you and your wife recieved. In my opinion, I gather that you are as just to blame for the game playing as your ex is. Lot's of posters come to this forum, get bent out of shape about the advice they recieve, but few come back to put us all in our place about it.

From what I gathered from your rants, you don't want your ex to move in with her boyfriend. I'm not being judgemental, but where did your current wife live before you were married to her?

If you're going to contest the move, then do so explaining how the move isn't in the best interest of your child. Can you explain to us how this move won't be in the best interest in your child? Is boyfriend a drug dealer, child molester, murderer, has a violent record? And also, just because your ex was married to an abuser, doesn't imply that she'll shack up with another abuser.

 

[cappadocia]

..... long-winded gasbag diatribe from the OP who has mistaken this board for the customer service/refund department .....

snore snore snore.

 

[Silverplum]

snore snore snore.

*applause!* for cappadocia. You nailed it.

Why aren't you a senior member yet?

 

[mistoffolees]

*applause!* for cappadocia. You nailed it.

Why aren't you a senior member yet?

I especially liked his/her sig:
"Read about a thousand pages of this forum and educate yourself on the matter first."

 

[thetiredwife]

I know this is coming some time later, but I want to give thanks to LdiJ for addressing some of the concerns here. To add some updates~ his mother picked her second week to also coincide with the first weekend of the month, to take over the Labor Day

holiday visit that year, and most adversarial of all: she called upon the child to testify in favor of the move so that (on the time my husband had already sent notice for vacation) we ended up having to bring the child to court. Not the best start to a vacation.

And this year she is also choosing dates that take up what would be the normal visitation here, so yes, this year she has received notice that summer vacation is now chosen for "off" weekends.

On a different note, I ask you to please understand that I never would or did debate that I have legal rights with that child. As I had previously said (more than once, I believe)~ I know I don't. And my husband did not say that the child's mother had no right

to live with someone else. A suggestion my husband had made, in fact, was her boyfriend moving in with her at her residence~ then the child would still live close by, in the same state and not had to have changed schools.

Also, I see how it would be hypocritical with the child's father questioning her boyfriend's role if this were a standard case of two exes having a child, splitting up, and then the father getting involved with/marrying me later on. As both of us stated: that isn't

the case here. The mother and I knew each other since we were 13. During the course of our "friendship", I met, dated, lived with, married and had children with my husband. After that is when she got pregnant and gave birth to this child. I actually saw him

be born because I was her labor coach and neither of us knew he was the child's father. After he was born, I was the childcare provider for him and his half-sister. So to (hopefully) be clear: yes, Mom did know me personally well before she had the child

with my husband. With her boyfriend, my husband had no clue about the guy until she suddenly said, "I want to move [child] across state lines to my boyfriend's house~ if you don't agree, I will take this to the courts". Which she did. And to be honest, now

that the guy has the child living in his house, he has a lot more involvement with the child than my husband does. That turned out to be a big issue with the mother's 2nd ex (? not sure if they officially divorced) -husband~ he was going to school meetings, more aware of and helping to make

legal/medical/educational/childcare decisions etc., even though the custody order outlines that my husband has shared legal custody in all of those areas.

Anyway, thanks again for the input, LdiJ

 

[stealth2]

All I'll say is... Thanks for providing me with some amusement in rereading your husband's threads. My opinion remains.

 

[Antigone*]

All I'll say is... Thanks for providing me with some amusement in rereading your husband's threads. My opinion remains.

Cappadocia should scoot over, I think I'm about to take a snooze too

I've got the CD from seniorjudge this morning and it says three more pages of diatribe to come.

 

[smommy1992]

So does this poster think the Free Advice Forum is a online blog or diary? Sheesh. And also the new wife adding her insights. Lordy. Snooze fest for sure!

 

[thetiredwife]

So does this poster think the Free Advice Forum is a online blog or diary? Sheesh. And also the new wife adding her insights. Lordy. Snooze fest for sure!

To say I am the new wife is false information. The child's parents were never married. He is a child of adultery. I am the only person my husband married.

Different year, same snark fest for sure!

 

[stealth2]

To say I am the new wife is false information. The child's parents were never married. He is a child of adultery. I am the only person my husband married.

Different year, same snark fest for sure!

Which you apparently enjoy.

 

[thetiredwife]

Wrong again. I've asked for my threads and profile to be deleted, and will be taking further steps. So I'll take this opportunity to say Thank You to Humusluvr, who was one of the few posters who understood the truth of the situation. Thanks again also to others who were able to answer the questions without getting adversarial. To the others, who did not seem to grasp that there are other children in this situation who have rights and needs as well~ I think it is sad you are not thinking of them at all. Now hopefully the moderators will close/delete all the threads before someone else adds another negatory statement.

 

[CJane]

To the others, who did not seem to grasp that there are other children in this situation who have rights and needs as well~ I think it is sad you are not thinking of them at all. Now hopefully the moderators will close/delete all the threads before someone else adds another negatory statement.

Who was your husband thinking of when he fathered THIS child?