Another alienation of affection plus child neglect.

[Carlos Ray]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?
Oklahoma. Solider was attending career school at a distant base. Returns home after 6 months training. Wife is unreceptive, unresponsive etc. demands divorce after few weeks. Husband tries to save marriage. After some period of time, but before any court action taken, soldier is contacted by woman who claims her husband has been having affair with soldier's wife for 4-6 months in the presence of the solider's 5 year old son. Soldier's wife is confronted by paramour's wife. Admits to affair, angily demands that soldier get out and challenges him to try to do something about it.

During this period wife is estranged from her mother due to situation and 5 y/o old son has no contact with maternal grandmother who lives few door away. Son has no contact with paternal grandparents who live 20 miles away, with aunts/uncles near in age to son. No contact with maternal aunt and uncle 8 miles away with cousins near in age to son. To avoid the affair becoming public son is rarely, if ever, taken outside to play with other children. The son did not know proper words to describe what he observed but could clearly describe sexual activity.

Would any kind of restraining order have been possible or effective? What kinds of criminal action, if any, could have been taken against either or both adults who were in their late 20s? Could the soldier have removed the child from the situation with or without legal documentation, possibly with police assistance?What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?

 

[Zigner]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?
Oklahoma. Solider was attending career school at a distant base. Returns home after 6 months training. Wife is unreceptive, unresponsive etc. demands divorce after few weeks. Husband tries to save marriage. After some period of time, but before any court action taken, soldier is contacted by woman who claims her husband has been having affair with soldier's wife for 4-6 months in the presence of the solider's 5 year old son. Soldier's wife is confronted by paramour's wife. Admits to affair, angily demands that soldier get out and challenges him to try to do something about it.

During this period wife is estranged from her mother due to situation and 5 y/o old son has no contact with maternal grandmother who lives few door away. Son has no contact with paternal grandparents who live 20 miles away, with aunts/uncles near in age to son. No contact with maternal aunt and uncle 8 miles away with cousins near in age to son. To avoid the affair becoming public son is rarely, if ever, taken outside to play with other children. The son did not know proper words to describe what he observed but could clearly describe sexual activity.

Would any kind of restraining order have been possible or effective? What kinds of criminal action, if any, could have been taken against either or both adults who were in their late 20s? Could the soldier have removed the child from the situation with or without legal documentation, possibly with police assistance?What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?

Most importantly, who are YOU in this situation?

 

[Isis1]

Who are you?

 

[Proserpina]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?
Oklahoma. Solider was attending career school at a distant base. Returns home after 6 months training. Wife is unreceptive, unresponsive etc. demands divorce after few weeks. Husband tries to save marriage. After some period of time, but before any court action taken, soldier is contacted by woman who claims her husband has been having affair with soldier's wife for 4-6 months in the presence of the solider's 5 year old son. Soldier's wife is confronted by paramour's wife. Admits to affair, angily demands that soldier get out and challenges him to try to do something about it.

During this period wife is estranged from her mother due to situation and 5 y/o old son has no contact with maternal grandmother who lives few door away. Son has no contact with paternal grandparents who live 20 miles away, with aunts/uncles near in age to son. No contact with maternal aunt and uncle 8 miles away with cousins near in age to son. To avoid the affair becoming public son is rarely, if ever, taken outside to play with other children. The son did not know proper words to describe what he observed but could clearly describe sexual activity.

Would any kind of restraining order have been possible or effective? What kinds of criminal action, if any, could have been taken against either or both adults who were in their late 20s? Could the soldier have removed the child from the situation with or without legal documentation, possibly with police assistance?What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?

(When did Oklahoma move to the East Coast? )


So, what proof does Dad have of any of the alleged neglect? What did he do about it at the time? How long ago did this happen?

(Incidentally, not allowing the child to see his extended family does not constitute neglect)

 

[Carlos Ray]

(When did Oklahoma move to the East Coast? )

So, what proof does Dad have of any of the alleged neglect? What did he do about it at the time? How long ago did this happen?

(Incidentally, not allowing the child to see his extended family does not constitute neglect)

My question while factual happened long enough ago to not matter legally. How about not allowing the child to play outside or be around other children?

Would a doctor' statement of neglect be enough? Or the grandmother's statement? The father after the training was stationed at another base in another state and could only get home on weekends. Dad tried to get mother to stop illicit and immoral activities and spend more time caring for son. The reponse was along the lines of ""I'm going to do whoever I want, whenever I want, where ever I want and you can't do anything about it." Replace "do" with any sexually explicit word you care to.

My questions are more concerned with the legal aspects of an ongoing illicit and immoral sexual relationship in the presence of the 5 year old son which was extremely upsetting to the son.

 

[Carlos Ray]

Most importantly, who are YOU in this situation?

Let us assume arguendo that I am the soldier in question.

 

[Isis1]

Let us assume arguendo that I am the soldier in question.

Law doesn't assume.

Carlos, go get dad to sign up so we can help him.

Oh nevermind, this happened so long ago, none of this matters legally.

 

[Zigner]

Let us assume arguendo that I am the soldier in question.

Let us assume that you are lying.
Good luck...

 

[Carlos Ray]

Let us assume that you are lying.
Good luck...

About what I expected from a "free" legal advice forum. As I said everything I stated was factual.

 

[Proserpina]

My question while factual happened long enough ago to not matter legally. How about not allowing the child to play outside or be around other children?

Then it's a non-issue.

It's up to a parent how they actually parent their own children. And you'd be very hard pressed to prove that Mom NEVER allowed the child to interact with anyone else or play outside.

Would a doctor' statement of neglect be enough?

The doctor would be a mandated reporter - had there been neglect noted, child services would have been involved.

Did that happen?

Or the grandmother's statement?

Hearsay. Not proof.

The father after the training was stationed at another base in another state and could only get home on weekends. Dad tried to get mother to stop illicit and immoral activities and spend more time caring for son. The reponse was along the lines of ""I'm going to do whoever I want, whenever I want, where ever I want and you can't do anything about it." Replace "do" with any sexually explicit word you care to.

She's legally allowed to do that as long as she's not directly exposing the child to sexual activity.


She can sleep with the entire base if she wants to.

Is it crappy parenting? Perhaps. But illegal? Nope.

My questions are more concerned with the legal aspects of an ongoing illicit and immoral sexual relationship in the presence of the 5 year old son which was extremely upsetting to the son.

Again, what proof is there that the child was actually present during the sexual activity?

And...if this happened a long time ago (per your first answer) what exactly do you want to happen now?

 

[Zigner]

About what I expected from a "free" legal advice forum. As I said everything I stated was factual.

Except for YOUR role in this scenario

 

[LdiJ]

My question while factual happened long enough ago to not matter legally. How about not allowing the child to play outside or be around other children?

Would a doctor' statement of neglect be enough? Or the grandmother's statement? The father after the training was stationed at another base in another state and could only get home on weekends. Dad tried to get mother to stop illicit and immoral activities and spend more time caring for son. The reponse was along the lines of ""I'm going to do whoever I want, whenever I want, where ever I want and you can't do anything about it." Replace "do" with any sexually explicit word you care to.

My questions are more concerned with the legal aspects of an ongoing illicit and immoral sexual relationship in the presence of the 5 year old son which was extremely upsetting to the son.

Look, you have no proof. A statement from grandma would be worthless and no doctor is going to give a statement regarding neglect in a case like this one.

About the only way that you could possibly prove that the child was harmed by mom's affairs is if a counselor or therapist diagnosed the child as having significant traumna as a result of witnessing something a child shouldn't witness.

And if the counselor or therapist said that the traunma was caused by you, because YOU were so upset over mom's affairs, then it could backfire on you.

 

[Proserpina]

And if the counselor or therapist said that the traunma was caused by you, because YOU were so upset over mom's affairs, then it could backfire on you.

BIG time!!

 

[Carlos Ray]

Law doesn't assume.

Carlos, go get dad to sign up so we can help him.

Oh nevermind, this happened so long ago, none of this matters legally.

Actually I learned the phrase "assuming argunedo" from a lawyer who at the time was known to have defended more accused murdrers than any other lawyer in the us. Dad is signed up. He has been talking to you. Just wondering if there was anything "legally" which could have/should have been done about a situation like this? Doing nothing and letting an innocent 5 y/o suffer for the selfishness and stupidity of adults was not an option. Beating oneself up for an extended period doesn't seem healthy. But I guess like the saying goes "You gets what you pays for." Didn't pay nothing so didn't get nothing.

 

[Proserpina]

Actually I learned the phrase "assuming argunedo" from a lawyer who at the time was known to have defended more accused murdrers than any other lawyer in the us. Dad is signed up. He has been talking to you. Just wondering if there was anything "legally" which could have/should have been done about a situation like this? Doing nothing and letting an innocent 5 y/o suffer for the selfishness and stupidity of adults was not an option. Beating oneself up for an extended period doesn't seem healthy. But I guess like the saying goes "You gets what you pays for." Didn't pay nothing so didn't get nothing.

Without proof of neglect, there has been no wrongdoing.

Again, Mom sleeping with the entire base is not illegal..and you've yet to tell us what you'd actually WANT to happen.

It likely wouldn't get custody changed, if that was your angle. Nor would she end up in jail or anything else like that.

Your recourse would be via the divorce court.