Texas
First, let me state that I know it is hard for anyone to trust that some anonymous person on a forum will be telling the whole story behind such a travesty as I am about to tell, but I need some advice and I would be wasting my time if I wasn't totally honest. Because I don't understand how something like this could happen, and I am hoping that someone will read this and will know what I can do.
I am a single mother, and I raised my son primarily on my own without help from family nor my son's father. I did, however, try to support the father in having contact with his son over the years, even though he moved back home to a different state and started a family and a successful business. For many years, I did not receive child support. I struggled, but it was ultimately worth it because my son is a fabulous, self-assured, wonderful kid.
My son is now 15 years old, and last year I noticed that he wanted to spend more time with his father (his father and family - including 3 children - now live in the same town as we do.) I supported it. His father and I do not see eye-to-eye on everything, and sometimes I would step in, like when his father wanted my son to spend his Summer Vacation babysitting their 3 kids while they were at work, and one of the kids was under 2 years old. His father angers easily, and our tenuous relationship deteriorated after that.
His father had been paying child support for the past few years, even though no paternity nor any court order had ever been established. Then, in September, my son's father stated he was no longer going to pay for child support.
So, for the first time in 15 years, I started proceedings for child support.
And my son's father, at the child support hearing, announced that he wanted custody.
I was not concerned...after all, I had raised him. He was in my care and I had never barred his father (in fact, I encouraged it because I felt that every child needs to have contact with their father no matter how that father behaves...as long as the child is in no danger) so I was not worried.
However, I hired a lawyer to make sure my son's rights were protected. My son wanted to stay with me. I knew that the only reason my son's father cried "custody" was in retaliation to my asking for him to bear his half of the responsibility.
Last Friday, we went to court. We showed his lack of involvement and his outbursts of anger. We made it clear that he never even bothered to establish paternity. We showed that I had been my son's sole caretaker for 15 years. We did not even bring my son to state his wishes because my case was so cut-and-dry, so I did not want to put him through a hearing.
My son's grades, however, have slipped since all of this has happened. he went from an A/B student in AP classes to failing many of the core classes he needs. I have been on top of it, but there is only so much a parent can do short of sitting over his shoulder in class to make sure he gets all of the assignments he is supposed to do. This situation has affected him, and his grades have slipped.
My son's father and his wife stated in court that it was my fault. We asked why they did not do anything since they were so concerned, but there was no clear answer. We showed the Associate Judge that I had taken steps to help bring up my son's grades, and none were due to my son's father.
But the Associate Judge awarded that man, who has never been in his life consistently, full custodial rights. Full. The Associate Judge ripped my son out of his home, and he stated in court that it was for only one reason. Grades.
Later, I found out that this Associate Judge is heavily into the school system, gives talks on Truancy, and runs a Truancy Court at local schools. It is his pet project.
This is a temporary order, and the final order will be in 2 months. But, my son is crushed and this has disrupted his life.
Here are my questions:
1. Does anyone know of precedent where temporary orders are reversed as issued by an Associate Judge?
2. Is it possible to have someone else look at the Associate Judge's ruling and see that it was based on one piece of evidence and not the whole? Also, the only piece of evidence he based his decision on was an old progress report that my son's father called a report card - but it was not a report card, and it did not reflect his current grades. My son has been working on them, and that progress report does not reflect his true grades. Since the progress report was wrongly entered, can I request an appeal?
3. My son wants to go to court to be heard. Can I request a new hearing on those grounds? Does this fall under Family Code 156.006?
My concern is that the Judge for the final hearing will not want to change his arrangements to avoid drastic changes (I've read that Judges do that) and will not take into account the fact that the Associate Judge made a drastic change.
I never thought this could happen. It is terrible when the Law does not protect people who are exercising their rights. I should not have gone to court for Child Support, but once my son's father cried "custody" I could not bring myself to let him bully me any more. Now, my son is paying the price for me standing up for myself.
Any advice would help. Sorry for the long post.
First, let me state that I know it is hard for anyone to trust that some anonymous person on a forum will be telling the whole story behind such a travesty as I am about to tell, but I need some advice and I would be wasting my time if I wasn't totally honest. Because I don't understand how something like this could happen, and I am hoping that someone will read this and will know what I can do.
I am a single mother, and I raised my son primarily on my own without help from family nor my son's father. I did, however, try to support the father in having contact with his son over the years, even though he moved back home to a different state and started a family and a successful business. For many years, I did not receive child support. I struggled, but it was ultimately worth it because my son is a fabulous, self-assured, wonderful kid.
My son is now 15 years old, and last year I noticed that he wanted to spend more time with his father (his father and family - including 3 children - now live in the same town as we do.) I supported it. His father and I do not see eye-to-eye on everything, and sometimes I would step in, like when his father wanted my son to spend his Summer Vacation babysitting their 3 kids while they were at work, and one of the kids was under 2 years old. His father angers easily, and our tenuous relationship deteriorated after that.
His father had been paying child support for the past few years, even though no paternity nor any court order had ever been established. Then, in September, my son's father stated he was no longer going to pay for child support.
So, for the first time in 15 years, I started proceedings for child support.
And my son's father, at the child support hearing, announced that he wanted custody.
I was not concerned...after all, I had raised him. He was in my care and I had never barred his father (in fact, I encouraged it because I felt that every child needs to have contact with their father no matter how that father behaves...as long as the child is in no danger) so I was not worried.
However, I hired a lawyer to make sure my son's rights were protected. My son wanted to stay with me. I knew that the only reason my son's father cried "custody" was in retaliation to my asking for him to bear his half of the responsibility.
Last Friday, we went to court. We showed his lack of involvement and his outbursts of anger. We made it clear that he never even bothered to establish paternity. We showed that I had been my son's sole caretaker for 15 years. We did not even bring my son to state his wishes because my case was so cut-and-dry, so I did not want to put him through a hearing.
My son's grades, however, have slipped since all of this has happened. he went from an A/B student in AP classes to failing many of the core classes he needs. I have been on top of it, but there is only so much a parent can do short of sitting over his shoulder in class to make sure he gets all of the assignments he is supposed to do. This situation has affected him, and his grades have slipped.
My son's father and his wife stated in court that it was my fault. We asked why they did not do anything since they were so concerned, but there was no clear answer. We showed the Associate Judge that I had taken steps to help bring up my son's grades, and none were due to my son's father.
But the Associate Judge awarded that man, who has never been in his life consistently, full custodial rights. Full. The Associate Judge ripped my son out of his home, and he stated in court that it was for only one reason. Grades.
Later, I found out that this Associate Judge is heavily into the school system, gives talks on Truancy, and runs a Truancy Court at local schools. It is his pet project.
This is a temporary order, and the final order will be in 2 months. But, my son is crushed and this has disrupted his life.
Here are my questions:
1. Does anyone know of precedent where temporary orders are reversed as issued by an Associate Judge?
2. Is it possible to have someone else look at the Associate Judge's ruling and see that it was based on one piece of evidence and not the whole? Also, the only piece of evidence he based his decision on was an old progress report that my son's father called a report card - but it was not a report card, and it did not reflect his current grades. My son has been working on them, and that progress report does not reflect his true grades. Since the progress report was wrongly entered, can I request an appeal?
3. My son wants to go to court to be heard. Can I request a new hearing on those grounds? Does this fall under Family Code 156.006?
My concern is that the Judge for the final hearing will not want to change his arrangements to avoid drastic changes (I've read that Judges do that) and will not take into account the fact that the Associate Judge made a drastic change.
I never thought this could happen. It is terrible when the Law does not protect people who are exercising their rights. I should not have gone to court for Child Support, but once my son's father cried "custody" I could not bring myself to let him bully me any more. Now, my son is paying the price for me standing up for myself.
Any advice would help. Sorry for the long post.
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