12yr old girl and 17yr old boy

[Just Blue]

Stepdad- YOU can be in legal hot water if you dont report this NOW

Reporters must report sexual activity when committed by a person responsible for the child’s welfare. Specifically, a report is mandated if the following three criteria are met:
(1) The activity involves a minor; - yep, we got that
(2) The minor’s partner is:
• a person responsible for the child’s welfare:
• an individual residing in the same home; or check mark number 2
a paramour of the child’s parent: AND
(3) Any of the following sexual activity occurred:
• Infection with a sexually transmitted disease. (“Sexually transmitted diseases are by DCFS definition “diseases which were acquired originally as a result of sexual penetration or conduct with an individual who was afflicted.”)
• Any contact between the sex organ of one person and an object, or the sex organ, mouth, or anus of another person. Typical acts include vaginal, oral and anal sex.
• The use of a child for sexual arousal, gratification, advantage or profit. This includes such acts as explicit verbal enticements, child pornography, self masturbation in the child’s presence, and forcing a child to watch sex acts; or
• Sexual conduct with a child when such contact, touching, or interaction is used for sexual arousal or gratification of sexual needs or desires. Sexual conduct means “any intentional or knowing touching or fondling either directly or through clothing of any part of the body for the purpose of sexual gratification.” Examples include fondling a child or having the child touch the perpetrator sexually. 720 ILCS 5/12-12(e). This would include kissing, petting, etc. It is used to induce sexual feelings

Mils Hon...Could you post the link so SD can read and believe...

 

[cbg]

Poster - she's twelve. That is underage by any possible definition.

I say again, if a senior in high school is interested in a 7th grader, either he is unusually immature or there is something going on. What makes you think the only opportunity is at home when you can watch them? At or after school is another option. Kids are usually pretty sneaky about getting into things their parents don't want them to be into.

 

[dmcc10880]

Are you sure about the kissing part? Everything I've read leads me to think it only starts being an issue at fondling. I want it to be kissing, believe me. But I keep reading stuff about contact (over clothing thankfully) with breasts / crotch being where the line is drawn.

Yes, you read right. Kissing.

Go look at the IL statutes for yourself. He's 17, she's under 13. The rules change A LOT when under 13.

 

[milspecgirl]

Mils Hon...Could you post the link so SD can read and believe...

I did- it is at the bottom of the post above that one, but here it is again:
http://www.youthlaw.org/fileadmin/ncyl/youthlaw/publications/minor_consent/IL_MinorConsent_may05.pdf

Poster- Im not sure about anyone else thoughts, but in mine, kissing does stimulate sexual emotions
And it states "any intentional touching (im pretty sure their lips and probably tongues touch) for the purpose of sexual gratification"
Do you think they are kissing for any reason but sexual gratification?????

And I promise, they are doing more than kissing. As the parent of 2 teenage girls- if there is kissing, there is petting and maybe more.

 

[milspecgirl]

Yes, you read right. Kissing.

Go look at the IL statutes for yourself. He's 17, she's under 13. The rules change A LOT when under 13.

oh yea- under 13, he looks at 30 years of prison as opposed to only 7 for over 13. That should make the child molester feel much better.

 

[Just Blue]

I don't need to stick up for anyone here, but JP, you're way out of line.

You came here looking for solutions. You were given them. You were given the implications for the boy and you were given the implications for you and your wife. You not only have moral, but serious legal obligations to ensure the safety and welfare of your stepdaughter. The kid is 12 years old!!!

Keep going down the path you are and if not facing legal problems, your stepdaughter will be one of those 12 and year olds having kids.

I can't even IMAGINE allowing my 12 yo to "hang" with an 17 yo. The ONLY reason this twerp is "dating" a child is because they are easier to sexually manipulate. If your wife has two working brain cells, she should realize this. Since you are here I will assume that your wife suffers from severe brain damage.

Have you called this 17 yo's parents to discuss this issue? If so what were their thoughts?
BTW: It is against the law for a 17 yo to romantically kiss a 12 year old CHILD.

 

[JPHenderson]

this is some of what I have found that shows that you are legally responsible to report this:

“’Abused child’ means a child whose parent or immediate family member, or any person responsible for the child’s welfare, or any individual residing in the same home as the child, or a paramour of the child’s parent:
(c) commits or allows to be committed any sex offense against such child, as such sex offenses are defined in the Criminal Code of 1961 as amended, and extending those definitions of sex offenses to include children under 18 years of age;

this is a website with a lot of good info on il and minors
http://www.youthlaw.org/fileadmin/ncyl/youthlaw/publications/minor_consent/IL_MinorConsent_may05.pdf

That PDF seems to have a lot more about health care and stuff than anything else. That Criminal Code of 1961 seems to have it all. Unfortunately I'm having a lot of trouble reading the damn thing.

720*ILCS*5/*Criminal Code of 1961.

Maybe someone more familiar with legal jargon could take a look at it?

 

[JPHenderson]

I don't need to stick up for anyone here, but JP, you're way out of line.

You came here looking for solutions. You were given them. You were given the implications for the boy and you were given the implications for you and your wife. You not only have moral, but serious legal obligations to ensure the safety and welfare of your stepdaughter. The kid is 12 years old!!!

Keep going down the path you are and if not facing legal problems, your stepdaughter will be one of those 12 and year olds having kids.

I disagree. I think my reply was appropraite based on the post I was replying to. However, I have no interest in starting any kind of argument here. The post I was replying to seemed to be going that way and maybe I should have just ignored it.

 

[Just Blue]

http://www.ilga.gov/legislation/ilcs/ilcs4.asp?DocName=072000050HArt.+11&ActID=1876&ChapterID=53&SeqStart=14500000&SeqEnd=20825000

cut and paste to your address bar.

 

[JPHenderson]

I can't even IMAGINE allowing my 12 yo to "hang" with an 17 yo. The ONLY reason this twerp is "dating" a child is because they are easier to sexually manipulate. If your wife has two working brain cells, she should realize this. Since you are here I will assume that your wife suffers from severe brain damage.

Have you called this 17 yo's parents to discuss this issue? If so what were their thoughts?
BTW: It is against the law for a 17 yo to romantically kiss a 12 year old CHILD.

The boys parents are all for it. She has helped calm him down and make him behave much better than he has in recent times.

They don't seem to think there is anything wrong with it at all. Of course, he can't get pregnant. And their way of raising him... well... he's been alone for a good portion of his life. So I don't think there is any help available there.

 

[milspecgirl]

from section 12-12 of the code

"Sexual conduct" means any intentional or knowing touching or fondling by the victim or the accused, either directly or through clothing, of the sex organs, anus or breast of the victim or the accused, or any part of the body of a child under 13 years of age,

that would include the mouth and tongue.
once she's 13, you may have to wait until he brushes her breast with his hand- which I assure you he is already doing.

 

[JPHenderson]

Poster - she's twelve. That is underage by any possible definition.

I say again, if a senior in high school is interested in a 7th grader, either he is unusually immature or there is something going on. What makes you think the only opportunity is at home when you can watch them? At or after school is another option. Kids are usually pretty sneaky about getting into things their parents don't want them to be into.

School is the only time she's alone. And yes, I know things can happen there. It is a primary concern for me. I know kids make out at school all the time. I know when I was in high school I certainly did. I can't convince her mother that this is the case though. The kids have both said they won't do it and she believes them.

 

[dmcc10880]

I disagree. I think my reply was appropraite based on the post I was replying to. However, I have no interest in starting any kind of argument here. The post I was replying to seemed to be going that way and maybe I should have just ignored it.

Here's the statute. Read it as pertains to the boy. I'll even help you out by BOLDING it. Oh, this also includes sexually oriented internet chats, webcams, etc....

(720 ILCS 5/12‑15) (from Ch. 38, par. 12‑15)
Sec. 12‑15. Criminal sexual abuse.
(a) The accused commits criminal sexual abuse if he or she:
(1) commits an act of sexual conduct by the use of

force or threat of force; or
(2) commits an act of sexual conduct and the accused

knew that the victim was unable to understand the nature of the act or was unable to give knowing consent.
(b) The accused commits criminal sexual abuse if the accused was under 17 years of age and commits an act of sexual penetration or sexual conduct with a victim who was at least 9 years of age but under 17 years of age when the act was committed.
(c) The accused commits criminal sexual abuse if he or she commits an act of sexual penetration or sexual conduct with a victim who was at least 13 years of age but under 17 years of age and the accused was less than 5 years older than the victim.
(d) Sentence. Criminal sexual abuse for a violation of subsection (b) or (c) of this Section is a Class A misdemeanor. Criminal sexual abuse for a violation of paragraph (1) or (2) of subsection (a) of this Section is a Class 4 felony. A second or subsequent conviction for a violation of subsection (a) of this Section is a Class 2 felony. For purposes of this Section it is a second or subsequent conviction if the accused has at any time been convicted under this Section or under any similar statute of this State or any other state for any offense involving sexual abuse or sexual assault that is substantially equivalent to or more serious than the sexual abuse prohibited under this Section.
(Source: P.A. 91‑389, eff. 1‑1‑00.)

How it affects you is handled elsewhere in the statutes.

 

[milspecgirl]

so stepdad- to cut to the chase.

YOU - as a person living in the same house and a paramour of the child's parent have the LEGAL RESPONSIBILITY as a mandated reporter of this child to report sexual misconduct between a 17 year old and a 12 year old (kissing - as shown in statute).

IF you dont, then it means you condone it and can be brought up on charges alongside mom and the boy.

 

[Just Blue]

The boys parents are all for it. She has helped calm him down and make him behave much better than he has in recent times.

They don't seem to think there is anything wrong with it at all. Of course, he can't get pregnant. And their way of raising him... well... he's been alone for a good portion of his life. So I don't think there is any help available there.

Call the father and let him know what is happening. Perhaps he will file for custody change. Let your wife know that you are no longer willing to quietly assist her in the sexual molestation of her daughter. Let her know that YOU will notify CPS if necessary.

I would also suggest if staying married to such a negligent woman is a good idea. If this man molests your s-daughter YOU will face felony criminal charges as well.