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Your best bet is to reach an agreement with your stbx on how all property and debts will be divided as well as child custody and child support (if relevant) and then submit it to the court for approval.
Then you're going to have a contested divorce. If you won't/can't pay for an attorney, you need to learn all the rules and procedures as well as understanding how it works. Spend a lot of time here reading other threads to get an idea of how it works in your state. Contact your court clerk to see if they have a self-help site or instructions on the procedures.
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