Moving out at 17

[linerider69]

Texas i have an issue my niece is 17 she has held down a job since 16 and recently has had to quit that job due to her situation.Her father is hooked on cocaine and is currently in jail she is currently in Colorado at her fathers ex grandparents another words his wifes parents which by the way her mother is not any better she has been in and out of jail drug charges.Anyway her grandfather made her quit her job wont let her have a phone she cant go anywhere without him or his wife cant get on the computer now he has her old phone and sending weird texts to her friends she is a honor roll student and will turn 18 and graduate then she realy wants to come live with me and my wife in Florida what can she do.

 

[OHRoadwarrior]

Wait until she is of legal age to make her own decisions and move to your house. She might want to finish out the school year and get her diploma first.

 

[Proserpina]

Texas i have an issue my niece is 17 she has held down a job since 16 and recently has had to quit that job due to her situation.Her father is hooked on cocaine and is currently in jail she is currently in Colorado at her fathers ex grandparents another words his wifes parents which by the way her mother is not any better she has been in and out of jail drug charges.Anyway her grandfather made her quit her job wont let her have a phone she cant go anywhere without him or his wife cant get on the computer now he has her old phone and sending weird texts to her friends she is a honor roll student and will turn 18 and graduate then she realy wants to come live with me and my wife in Florida what can she do.

She should also realize that she has no "right" to a phone, or internet use, or anything else of that nature.

 

[linerider69]

She is 17 has held a job has no access to her money has not had any run ins with the law straight a honor roll student and you saying the phone she previously purchased with her own money in Texas where she was working 2 jobs supporting her and her fathers drug habit she should not be able to have a phone or contact with the outside world

 

[Proserpina]

She is 17 has held a job has no access to her money has not had any run ins with the law straight a honor roll student and you saying the phone she previously purchased with her own money in Texas where she was working 2 jobs supporting her and her fathers drug habit she should not be able to have a phone or contact with the outside world

You have a reading comprehension problem, and frankly are displaying disturbing signs that you should not be around children at all.

Now go back and re-read what I actually WROTE, instead of what you read into.

Thanks.

 

[linerider69]

I have a different outlook on it people that would lock children up with no social interaction is wrong.I have three children that are A students one with a scholarship so maybe its people like you that is wrong. If a 17 year old has a job and A's in school yes i do believe they are worthy of they're own phone as long as they use it accordingly, you are wrong. And constantly telling a child that they will end up like they're parents who are druggies felons and such is wrong. thanks for the useless advice as it were.We have enough screwed up children in this country so should we deny the good one rewards or always keep them down hoping that will drive them forward what say you.

 

[Proserpina]

I have a different outlook on it people that would lock children up with no social interaction is wrong.I have three children that are A students one with a scholarship so maybe its people like you that is wrong. If a 17 year old has a job and A's in school yes i do believe they are worthy of they're own phone as long as they use it accordingly, you are wrong. And constantly telling a child that they will end up like they're parents who are druggies felons and such is wrong. thanks for the useless advice as it were.We have enough screwed up children in this country so should we deny the good one rewards or always keep them down hoping that will drive them forward what say you.

I simply said that the child has NO LEGAL RIGHT to a phone. This is about legalities, not what you think may or may not be appropriate.

Did I say that they shouldn't have one? No.

Did I even indicate anything of that nature? NO.

Are you even reading?

 

[linerider69]

That was not the issue weather or not she has a right to a phone or not. The issue was, does she have any legal rights or options that would permit her to move out i wasn't asking for your legal interpretation of her rights to phones or internet or freedom to leave the house without supervision maybe you commented on the wrong thing to begin with that's my point. She is living with people that degrade her and despite her good behavior and superb standing in school afford her not even the most human of amenities even though she has the means to afford them.

 

[Proserpina]

That was not the issue weather or not she has a right to a phone or not. The issue was, does she have any legal rights or options that would permit her to move out i wasn't asking for your legal interpretation of her rights to phones or internet or freedom to leave the house without supervision maybe you commented on the wrong thing to begin with that's my point. She is living with people that degrade her and despite her good behavior and superb standing in school afford her not even the most human of amenities even though she has the means to afford them.

Short answer: No.

Unless her legal guardians agree, anyway.

 

[CdwJava]

Until she is 18 she has no legal right to move away without her parents' (or legal guardian's) permission. Even if.

In TX there exists a potential loophole in the law that might restrict law enforcement's ability to forcibly return her home at age 17. However, since you are talking about encouraging her to cross state lines from Colorado or Texas to be with you and your wife and that could bring a whole world of hurt (read: Criminal Charges) on you and your spouse.

linerider69, what you believe should happen is not necessarily what the law will allow to happen. Until she is 18 she is legally subject to the rule of her parent(s) or legal guardian. If she is being abused or neglected, notify the appropriate child service agency or law enforcement. If she is at risk she will be placed in foster care or alternative family placement until she is an adult. When she is 18 she can certainly decide to go where she pleases ... hopefully AFTER she has graduated from high school.

 

[linerider69]

Thank you for your reply

 

[mistoffolees]

That was not the issue weather or not she has a right to a phone or not. The issue was, does she have any legal rights or options that would permit her to move out i wasn't asking for your legal interpretation of her rights to phones or internet or freedom to leave the house without supervision maybe you commented on the wrong thing to begin with that's my point. She is living with people that degrade her and despite her good behavior and superb standing in school afford her not even the most human of amenities even though she has the means to afford them.

You're not listening.

The child has guardians. They are the ones who make the decisions about what the child can have and what the child can't have. They control where the child goes and who the child sees. A 17 year old does not have the right to do whatever they want.

No one here is saying that a 17 year old shouldn't have some freedom or the use of a phone or internet (assuming, of course, that they didn't abuse it - which we don't know isn't the case here). But it's up to the guardians, not us. You really need to back off and be nice to the guardians if you want ANY contact with the child. At the very least, you could find that you're not allowed to even talk to the child. At worst, you could find yourself on the receiving end of a restraining order.

IF you have reason to believe that the child is in danger (not just losing phone or internet privileges, but real danger), then you can contact CPS. But other than that, you have no right to be involved. None. The only exception would be if the grandparents do not have legal guardianship. In that case, it would be up to the parents who the child associates with - but they've already made that decision.

 

[cbg]

The point is, there is no law saying that she has to be allowed a phone or internet use. Therefore, she has no legal right to one. We are not saying that in our opinion she is not worthy of one; we are saying that as far as the law is concerned, if her parent or guardian does not want her to have them, then she doesn't have them. Period.

On her 18th birthday she can move out of the house and go wherever she wants, and you can allow her to have 6 phones and unlimited internet access 24 hours a day. Until then, and not one minute earlier, she has the legal right to live where her legal guardian says she lives and to have only what social media her legal guardian says she has.

 

[OHRoadwarrior]

She is 17 has held a job has no access to her money has not had any run ins with the law straight a honor roll student and you saying the phone she previously purchased with her own money in Texas where she was working 2 jobs supporting her and her fathers drug habit she should not be able to have a phone or contact with the outside world

Why yes I would say that. It is up to her parents to decide that. If she were using the phone to contact people encouraging her to be rebellious, I would certainly do it. Their job is to raise her until she is an adult. If she works, has not been arrested and is on the honor roll, they have certainly been making some good decisions so far. If they can maintain the balance for a little while longer she will be raised. Then she is legally free to hate a parent or anyone else she chooses.

 

[mistoffolees]

Why yes I would say that. It is up to her parents to decide that. If she were using the phone to contact people encouraging her to be rebellious, I would certainly do it. Their job is to raise her until she is an adult. If she works, has not been arrested and is on the honor roll, they have certainly been making some good decisions so far. If they can maintain the balance for a little while longer she will be raised. Then she is legally free to hate a parent or anyone else she chooses.

Actually, she's legally free to hate a parent or anyone else she chooses right now. Still has to do what they say, but she's allowed to hate them.


The one thing that's not clear - and which might be relevant is the custody situation. OP says that the grandparents are guardians. Does that mean that they're legal guardians? If so, all the above advice applies. If they're not legal guardians and are just watching the kids while Dad is in jail, then Dad gets to make the decisions - and they can enforce them.

Mom enters into this, as well. Did she give up her custody rights? Again, if so, the above applies. If not, then Mom is the one who has the right to make decisions (and, once again, she can let the grandparents enforce).

So, OP, what is the actual custodial situation? Who has legal custody? Are the grandparents legal guardians? Have the parents' parental rights been terminated?


Of course, none of that matters very much. There's no scenario where OP is going to have any rights in this situation, but it might help to clarify who she need to get permission from.