Crazy EX is threatning me with court

[Justrights]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? PA
Some back history, my wife cheated on me, we split we signed a seperation agreement. We have 3 kids who live with her

I am originally from PA but moved to california to work on my music, Today i call my daughter becaise i try to talk to my kids every day. After i talk to my daughter my ex gets on the phone yealling and calling me names telling me if i dont give her 500 by the 15th shes going to take me to court and not allow me to speak to my kids

now i was paying her 500 a month when i lived in PA and had a job, I lost my job and then moved to cai where i have been trying to get a job for a month now. Only income i have is my music royalties (about 300 a month) that i give to the ex, every dime, she said thats not good enuff she wants more I tell her thats all i GOT every month she said she dont care whe will go to court and they will make me pay based on my old jobs income...

Is that true? also is she legally allowed to keep my kids from talkign to me? I have joint custody as well right? i never gave up those rights. I need help with this situation I dont want her to feel she can walk all over me and im trying to be civil for the kids, shes just mad that she has a loser boyfriend now who doesnt help her with anything so she wants to take her frustration out on me

 

[mistoffolees]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? PA
Some back history, my wife cheated on me, we split we signed a seperation agreement. We have 3 kids who live with her

I am originally from PA but moved to california to work on my music, Today i call my daughter becaise i try to talk to my kids every day. After i talk to my daughter my ex gets on the phone yealling and calling me names telling me if i dont give her 500 by the 15th shes going to take me to court and not allow me to speak to my kids

now i was paying her 500 a month when i lived in PA and had a job, I lost my job and then moved to cai where i have been trying to get a job for a month now. Only income i have is my music royalties (about 300 a month) that i give to the ex, every dime, she said thats not good enuff she wants more I tell her thats all i GOT every month she said she dont care whe will go to court and they will make me pay based on my old jobs income...

Is that true? also is she legally allowed to keep my kids from talkign to me? I have joint custody as well right? i never gave up those rights. I need help with this situation I dont want her to feel she can walk all over me and im trying to be civil for the kids, shes just mad that she has a loser boyfriend now who doesnt help her with anything so she wants to take her frustration out on me

Was your separation agreement ever signed by a judge? If so, what does it say about custody, visitation, and about communication?

In general, though, paying of Child Support is not a ticket to see or talk to the kids. Assuming that you have the right to do so (which you would unless the agreement was signed by a judge and says that you don't), then you have the right to speak to the kids. If ex doesn't allow you, you can file in court for a modification to the agreement to order her to allow you to talk with the kids. If the order already says that you have the right to talk with the kids, you can file for contempt.

 

[Banned_Princess]

Ps, you have to file where they live, so best of luck doing that...

 

[Justrights]

no it was never signed by a judge i paid for a seperation agreement we both signed it and had it witnessed, I talk to my kids everyday i dont know what i would do if she trys to keep the kids from me cuz im in california trying to better my life....

 

[stealth2]

How are you paying for school?

https://forum.freeadvice.com/small-claims-courts-24/looking-help-creating-motion-tocompel-discovery-525809.html

 

[LdiJ]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? PA
Some back history, my wife cheated on me, we split we signed a seperation agreement. We have 3 kids who live with her

I am originally from PA but moved to california to work on my music, Today i call my daughter becaise i try to talk to my kids every day. After i talk to my daughter my ex gets on the phone yealling and calling me names telling me if i dont give her 500 by the 15th shes going to take me to court and not allow me to speak to my kids

now i was paying her 500 a month when i lived in PA and had a job, I lost my job and then moved to cai where i have been trying to get a job for a month now. Only income i have is my music royalties (about 300 a month) that i give to the ex, every dime, she said thats not good enuff she wants more I tell her thats all i GOT every month she said she dont care whe will go to court and they will make me pay based on my old jobs income...

Is that true? also is she legally allowed to keep my kids from talkign to me? I have joint custody as well right? i never gave up those rights. I need help with this situation I dont want her to feel she can walk all over me and im trying to be civil for the kids, shes just mad that she has a loser boyfriend now who doesnt help her with anything so she wants to take her frustration out on me

As you have already been told, visitation/communication and child support are two separate legal issues.

You have every right to file for enforceable court orders regarding visitation and communication with your children.

Your wife has every right to file for enforceable child support...and yes, it would be based on your previous income, from the job that you voluntarily quit.

 

[stealth2]

Where did you see that he quit his job?

 

[cyjeff]

Where did you see that he quit his job?

When he left for California to "better his life".

 

[stealth2]

He posted that he lost his job and then moved to CA.

 

[mistoffolees]

no it was never signed by a judge i paid for a seperation agreement we both signed it and had it witnessed, I talk to my kids everyday i dont know what i would do if she trys to keep the kids from me cuz im in california trying to better my life....

Then you don't have any orders and she doesn't have to do anything. Until it's signed by a judge, nothing the two of you agree to is enforceable.

You need to file for a binding custody agreement through the courts in PA (PA doesn't have legal separation but you can still file for custody while separated). This separation agreement can cover things like visitation and phone contact. It should also cover the child support you should be paying.

Once you have a separation agreement in place, if she doesn't follow it, you can file for contempt.

 

[LdiJ]

Where did you see that he quit his job?

After re-reading it again it does appear that he may have lost his job rather than quit voluntarily. He also might have gotten fired rather than laid off.

 

[tuffbrk]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? PA
Some back history, my wife cheated on me, we split we signed a seperation agreement. We have 3 kids who live with her

I am originally from PA but moved to california to work on my music, Today i call my daughter becaise i try to talk to my kids every day. After i talk to my daughter my ex gets on the phone yealling and calling me names telling me if i dont give her 500 by the 15th shes going to take me to court and not allow me to speak to my kids

now i was paying her 500 a month when i lived in PA and had a job, I lost my job and then moved to cai where i have been trying to get a job for a month now. Only income i have is my music royalties (about 300 a month) that i give to the ex, every dime, she said thats not good enuff she wants more I tell her thats all i GOT every month she said she dont care whe will go to court and they will make me pay based on my old jobs income...

Is that true? also is she legally allowed to keep my kids from talkign to me? I have joint custody as well right? i never gave up those rights. I need help with this situation I dont want her to feel she can walk all over me and im trying to be civil for the kids, shes just mad that she has a loser boyfriend now who doesnt help her with anything so she wants to take her frustration out on me

You need to put on your big boy pants frankly. It is not her "loser" boyfriend that should be helping her, it is you. YOU are her husband. You have 3 children and you send $300 a month?! What do you think the quality of their life is right now without being supported by you? If you cannot obtain employment in your field - and be prepared to demonstrate that you are looking in your field of experience in Cali if she initiates a court action-, the least you can do for your children who you left behind in PA is to obtain a part time job.

You and your wife need to file for divorce and establish a long distance parenting plan. It is pretty clear that you both have moved on with your lives despite the fact that you are still married to one another. Keep in mind that as her SPOUSE, you are still legally responsible for half of any expenses she is accruing as Legal Separation is not recognized in PA.

 

[Ohiogal]

You need to put on your big boy pants frankly. It is not her "loser" boyfriend that should be helping her, it is you. YOU are her husband. You have 3 children and you send $300 a month?! What do you think the quality of their life is right now without being supported by you? If you cannot obtain employment in your field - and be prepared to demonstrate that you are looking in your field of experience in Cali if she initiates a court action-, the least you can do for your children who you left behind in PA is to obtain a part time job.

You and your wife need to file for divorce and establish a long distance parenting plan. It is pretty clear that you both have moved on with your lives despite the fact that you are still married to one another. Keep in mind that as her SPOUSE, you are still legally responsible for half of any expenses she is accruing as Legal Separation is not recognized in PA.

Since there are NOT court orders he doesn't have to pay anything to her for support. Mom could also be working quite frankly. Oh and as her spouse, he could be ordered to pay half the marital debt. However, mom needs to be careful because dad could have that offset by proving dissipation of marital assets (i.e. anything spent on the boyfriend).

 

[tuffbrk]

I absolutely agree that since orders are not in place he does not have to pay anything at this time. If he could care less about how the decrease in household income is impacting his kids - that's his choice. He is the one who looks at himself in the mirror everyday.

I was pointing out that his whining about her boyfriend not helping her out is inappropriate. And reminding him that expenses incurred are still half his problem. Of course, any he is incurring are half her problem as well.

 

[Justrights]

trust me i have been trying for 2 months to get a job, me and her have been seperated for almost 2 years, and we split because i cought her cheating on me with the guy shes with now.