wife makes triple what i make

[murrayr]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Massachusetts
wife has proposed selling house 50-50 proceeds, cutody of children, no child support, no alimony, wants to keep her retirement account (2 times mine). i am self employed will be nearly impossible to get loan, can not afford to stay in current town. any advise?

 

[mistoffolees]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Massachusetts
wife has proposed selling house 50-50 proceeds, cutody of children, no child support, no alimony, wants to keep her retirement account (2 times mine). i am self employed will be nearly impossible to get loan, can not afford to stay in current town. any advise?

There's no way to tell if what she's offering is fair or completely unreasonable without more information:

- How long were you married?
- Was the home purchased during the marriage or was it inherited or purchased by one of you before the marriage?
- Were the retirement accounts completely accumulated during the marriage? If not, more details (how much was there before the marriage in each account and how much now) are needed
- Are you OK with her having custody? If not, who has been the primary caregiver for the children? How old are the children? Will you be living close enough that 50:50 parenting time would be feasible?


Very general rules are:

- Marital assets and marital debts are typically split 50:50
- The marital portion of retirement accounts should be equally split
- Custody will be determined on the best interests of the child. There is no preference for either parent. USUALLY, that means that the parent who has been the primary caregiver will have primary custody unless the two parents agree to something different (such as 50:50). If the child is older (mid- to late-teens), the child's preference becomes important
http://childcustodycoach.com/massachusetts/
- Once custody has been determined, child support can be calculated. The courts need a pretty good reason to deviate significantly from the guidelines:
https://wfb.dor.state.ma.us/DORCommon/Worksheets/CSE/Guidelines.aspx
However, if the two parents agree to something different, the courts will probably approve it (unless money is owed to the state, for example)
- Alimony depends on a lot of factors:
http://www.divorcenet.com/states/massachusetts/mafaq_06
Alimony is open for the judge to exercise discretion, so it's hard to figure out what's fair. There is a calculator online for MA, but I can't vouch for its accuracy:
http://alimonyformula.com/

 

[LdiJ]

There's no way to tell if what she's offering is fair or completely unreasonable without more information:

- How long were you married?
- Was the home purchased during the marriage or was it inherited or purchased by one of you before the marriage?
- Were the retirement accounts completely accumulated during the marriage? If not, more details (how much was there before the marriage in each account and how much now) are needed
- Are you OK with her having custody? If not, who has been the primary caregiver for the children? How old are the children? Will you be living close enough that 50:50 parenting time would be feasible?


Very general rules are:

- Marital assets and marital debts are typically split 50:50
- The marital portion of retirement accounts should be equally split
- Custody will be determined on the best interests of the child. There is no preference for either parent. USUALLY, that means that the parent who has been the primary caregiver will have primary custody unless the two parents agree to something different (such as 50:50). If the child is older (mid- to late-teens), the child's preference becomes important
Child Custody Laws Massachusetts - Massachusetts Child Custody Laws
- Once custody has been determined, child support can be calculated. The courts need a pretty good reason to deviate significantly from the guidelines:
https://wfb.dor.state.ma.us/DORCommon/Worksheets/CSE/Guidelines.aspx
However, if the two parents agree to something different, the courts will probably approve it (unless money is owed to the state, for example)
- Alimony depends on a lot of factors:
Massachusetts Alimony | divorcenet.com
Alimony is open for the judge to exercise discretion, so it's hard to figure out what's fair. There is a calculator online for MA, but I can't vouch for its accuracy:
Alimony Calculator, Divorce Spousal Support, Divorce Attorneys, Massachusetts

I will add one more thing that could be significant in your case.

When one party is self employed, and the other party is not, it can become very complicated and contentious to determine the self employed party's income for child support or alimony purposes.

Non cash expenses (such as depreciation and amortization) are normally added back into income, and then shaky transactions (expenses that someone might be getting away with expensing but really are personal expenses) factor in, and legit expenses (ie company car) that replace the need for the same personal expense factor in as well.

So take those things into consideration when comparing your incomes.

 

[xylene]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Massachusetts
wife has proposed selling house 50-50 proceeds, cutody of children, no child support, no alimony, wants to keep her retirement account (2 times mine). i am self employed will be nearly impossible to get loan, can not afford to stay in current town. any advise?

I think, unless your wife makes 3 times very little... that you are getting divorced and need to be working out the divorce with your lawyer and not your stbx-wife.

Please remember it is an adversarial process, even if you are hoping it to go otherwise.

 

[nextwife]

You should each get half the marital portion of the other's retiorement plan. As stated, the primary caregiver would be the most likely party to be granted primary custody.

If this was a long term marriage, and there is a large income disrepancy, you may be entitled to spousal support.