pregnant minor daughter fmla

[commentator]

Since I'm not Hugh O'Laughlin or one of those guys, I'll just say it here, I'll put you in my prayers, you're due for some get better things in your life! Kidney stones are mean!

Sad to say, it's possible that compared to other places, the city you were in may have a lower unemployment rate, but then that thing is figured so screwy-ly it has no contact with or very little relation to the realities of daily life. For example, people who have exhausted their benefits, or who are working 20 hours a week for minimum wage when they used to be full time professionals are not even counted. If the big downturn in your area happened more than 2 years ago, most of the affected are not being counted any more.

I have come to work and been unable to get a parking place within a mile of my worksite -- because of a rumor that one of the local companies was going to add a few jobs. I am not amazed that you'd get 200 resumes for one position. Just 200? And I heartily want to strangle those wonderful politicians who announce that if we keep extending unemployment benefits, it discourages people from trying to get another job. It's a popular viewpoint, but only when it hasn't happened to you yet.

The appeals board system in CA is pretty much the same as it is in every state, a landing place for political appointees who need favors and a cushy job that doesn't require an accounting degree or real skills. As are most "boards."

Unfortunately, the agency itself doesn't really have the professional staff on hand that would replace the board, or the money to hire such staff, and when they start talking about contracting it out and privatizing it, that just gets into more political messes and more big salaries. I'd be tickled to volunteer to do it for say, about half of what they're paying the board members now! And it would make a fine job for you. By the way, have you applied for civil service jobs? I know they're laying off statewide, but they do still, at present have insurance benefits and have to hire occasionally.

 

[gabe75007]

I feel like I am being attacked for asking about unemployment....I am not actively seeking unemployment benefits, I am trying to cover all my options. I am actually actively seeking employment elsewhere at this time, I am good at what I do, and I get paid well. Unemployment is not my idea of living. I have savings and can make it, I just want to cover all my basis. Yes if I take off of work there is the possibility they will fire me for just 2 - 3 days, while I have sick time available, Texas is a no fault state. I am trying to protect myself in the event that when i take off the few days....would i be protected under FMLA. And the reason I say close is because we have about 70 employees, but several of them work more than 75 miles away, but not at all times. So sometimes we have the 50 employees, sometimes we do not. I cannot go back and correct something that I have not done wrong with my employer, as i have asked if there was any kind of problem and told "no". This is a small office, most of our employees are in the field and it is not always the employees "fault". I do have the longest tenure in our office and it is just "my time" as everyone elses before me. And yes my daughter may have made a mistake, but I am not going to not be there for the birth, she does have anemia, and as far as being "proud", yes I will love her and her baby like any parent or grandparent should, am i happy she made a mistake no************** I feel more attacked, than helped on here, and have done research and there is such a thing as sitting in loco parentis (if that is the correct phrase)......Thanks...

 

[gabe75007]

which i thought someone on here might be familiar with.....

 

[Proserpina]

I feel like I am being attacked for asking about unemployment....I am not actively seeking unemployment benefits, I am trying to cover all my options. I am actually actively seeking employment elsewhere at this time, I am good at what I do, and I get paid well. Unemployment is not my idea of living. I have savings and can make it, I just want to cover all my basis. Yes if I take off of work there is the possibility they will fire me for just 2 - 3 days, while I have sick time available, Texas is a no fault state. I am trying to protect myself in the event that when i take off the few days....would i be protected under FMLA. And the reason I say close is because we have about 70 employees, but several of them work more than 75 miles away, but not at all times. So sometimes we have the 50 employees, sometimes we do not. I cannot go back and correct something that I have not done wrong with my employer, as i have asked if there was any kind of problem and told "no". This is a small office, most of our employees are in the field and it is not always the employees "fault". I do have the longest tenure in our office and it is just "my time" as everyone elses before me. And yes my daughter may have made a mistake, but I am not going to not be there for the birth, she does have anemia, and as far as being "proud", yes I will love her and her baby like any parent or grandparent should, am i happy she made a mistake no************** I feel more attacked, than helped on here, and have done research and there is such a thing as sitting in loco parentis (if that is the correct phrase)......Thanks...

I have absolutely no idea why you feel attacked - not one person was even loosely unkind to you.




In any event, "loco parentis" isn't relevant here. You are the actual parent of your own child, so it doesn't apply there - and you are not acting in loco parentis of her unborn child.

 

[cbg]

Whether FMLA applies or not in that case would depend on exactly how many weeks last year you had over 50 and how many you had under 50. The law makes provision for that.

However, unless you are needed to provide medical care for your daughter, this would not be covered under FMLA anyway.

 

[gabe75007]

Thanks for the responses and I guess i did think that "hot topic" response was loosely unkind.

Now that I know I cannot be protected under FMLA or draw unemployment as an option, I will try harder to look for another employer that will be understanding to my situation.

Thanks again....

 

[gabe75007]

One more question or referral possibly.....

I have done more research on "parentis loco" in regards to FMLA and if we have enough employees, why would I not qualify?? I assume I am not reading it correctly......

I am not trying to be impossible here, just want to know my rights.....



Thanks!!!

 

[Proserpina]

One more question or referral possibly.....

I have done more research on "parentis loco" in regards to FMLA and if we have enough employees, why would I not qualify?? I assume I am not reading it correctly......

I am not trying to be impossible here, just want to know my rights.....



Thanks!!!

In "loco parentis" means that you're acting as a parent to a child to whom you are not related.

Maybe you can read this? It's a pretty good article


http://www.shrm.org/TemplatesTools/hrqa/Pages/FMLAInLocoParentis.aspx

 

[gabe75007]

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This is the link to what I read, I cannot open the the other link, i guess i have to be a member.

Thanks for taking the time to read my posts, as i am having trouble understanding why. I just really want to / need to be there for my daughter, she is young and I would feel like I am an awful mother, if i chose a job over her baby's birth.

Thanks.....

 

[Proserpina]

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This is the link to what I read, I cannot open the the other link, i guess i have to be a member.

Thanks for taking the time to read my posts, as i am having trouble understanding why. I just really want to / need to be there for my daughter, she is young and I would feel like I am an awful mother, if i chose a job over her baby's birth.

Thanks.....

Ok, do what I did. Go to google, and use "loco parentis FMLA" as the search.

The first or second link should be the page I referenced.

But, the bottom line is, you're not in loco parentis for the purposes of FMLA (or anything, really). You're the child's parent - and your child isn't sick, she's pregnant.

I cannot see FMLA applying here at all.

 

[Banned_Princess]

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This is the link to what I read, I cannot open the the other link, i guess i have to be a member.

Thanks for taking the time to read my posts, as i am having trouble understanding why. I just really want to / need to be there for my daughter, she is young and I would feel like I am an awful mother, if i chose a job over her baby's birth.

Thanks.....

would you rather lose your job, and the ability to financially support your daughter and her newborn?

Yes, being there for the birth (one or two vacation days) but you do not need to be under foot 24/7 when she comes out of the hospital.

your child will be fine, and most likely not accidentally kill the baby while you are at work. help her help herself. baby books, childcare books, "what to expect in the first year" book.

having a baby is a grown up decision, and she needs to grow up. you being there 24/7 is going to allow her to slack off, and not accept the responsibility



you cant be considered "de facto parent" either, because there is no child yet, and it takes years of being grandbabys only parent to have this apply.



we all get your excited, but loosing the family's (presumably) only income (a excellent income at that) will be the opposite of helpful.

your child made a serious decision, don't bail her out, I can almost guarantee that wont end well, help her to exceed by making her care for this kid ALONE. or in the next couple of years you will be back, trying to get custody of her child. teenagers bounce back from child birth surprisingly fast. She will be fine alone with a newborn for 8 (or more) hours a day.

be supportive without taking over. Its a fine line to walk, but you MUST do it.

give her tools to be independent, without relieving her of the responsibility to deal with her decisions.

 

[Banned_Princess]

Maybe her MD will consider a C section on the weekend so you can be there without losing time at work.

I don't think your job will complain too much if your only taking a day or two. If you can notify them in advance when those days will be. Surely you have vacation time.

(lots of Americans claim they are sick to use their sick days, but you might have sunk that boat by already telling them you want off for a grandbabys birth)

 

[ecmst12]

C sections should not be scheduled for the convenience of the mother or her family. It is not in anyone's best interests to subject her to major surgery, longer recoveries, risk of infection, etc, if it's not MEDICALLY necessary.

 

[Proserpina]

C sections should not be scheduled for the convenience of the mother or her family. It is not in anyone's best interests to subject her to major surgery, longer recoveries, risk of infection, etc, if it's not MEDICALLY necessary.

Couldn't agree more.

Unfortunately, that's a current trend.

 

[Banned_Princess]

C sections should not be scheduled for the convenience of the mother or her family. It is not in anyone's best interests to subject her to major surgery, longer recoveries, risk of infection, etc, if it's not MEDICALLY necessary.

Well, regardless, it is, and can be done. happens all of the time. It depends on the insurance and the doctor. (Medicaid wont authorize that, but some private companies will) celebrities do it all of the time. so do working moms who have the money like that.

teenagers have a unique ability to recover from c sections and natural child births fairly easy.

I had a c section when I was a teenager for the convenience of the MD delivering for me. (plus my labor was going on 19 hours with no dilation at all, after being induced, and my water being broken manually) it was fast, easy, painless, and over with. I wouldn't have had it any other way, in hindsight. yes recovery in the hospital was about a week longer then natural, but it wasn't awful. gave me more time to rest before bringing baby home to my exclusive care.

keep the incision area clean, and wipe it with alcohol to kill the germs. I don't see how its much different from cutting the vag to allow the baby out (perineum?) just like any cut or incision, the wound needs to be cared for, and caring for it isn't really that big of deal


It might be an option. Ops daughter should talk it over with her ob/gyn. If he's not willing to do it, then thats that.

if scheduled c section is out, maybe MD could be persuaded to induce labor at the proper weeks gestation, instead. (granted the baby doesnt come out naturally before the date to induce.)


we are in the 21st century. I think people can care for their wounds without fear of death.