Trying To Divorce Someone Who Changed Their Identity

[hurtingwoman]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? California.

Hi, I need some advice because I'm not getting any answers through the system.

I'll keep my story short and to the point.

I married someone in the state of Florida. Then, a year later, found out he was a drug informant. Due to the nature of some of his work, the DA in California changed his name, social security number, etc and instructed us to get married again after we were relocated to the state of Maryland.

So, now that I'm trying to get a divorce, it looks like I'm married to two people.

My question is, on the divorce form, how do I list his names under the Respondent section? Do I list them like this:

(His new identity name) aka (His old identity name)

Also, under date of marriage, do I list both dates of marriage with the city and state?

Thanks if anyone can help. I don't have money, the system isn't helping me because nobody knows what to do, and the DA will not assist me because they are done with his case.

 

[OHRoadwarrior]

I would divorce him in the appropriate states under each name. Is he okay with a non contested divorce?

 

[mistoffolees]

I would divorce him in the appropriate states under each name. Is he okay with a non contested divorce?

This is going to get complicated. Clearly, the person can not show up for the divorce under his old name.

Besides, when the DA changes his name and SS number, doesn't the old person cease to exist?

I think I'd talk with an attorney to make sure you handle this right.

 

[hurtingwoman]

Thank you for your responses.

I can't afford an attorney. When I go to the legal services projects centers, a lot of them tell me they don't know, and I've even had some say, "Just divorce his current identity."

When I say, "Well, to the law, it will still look like I'm married to his first identity in the state of Florida." To which she replied, "Well, who's going to know?" That's not good enough for me.

Onto the next part, my ex is very unreliable, and extremely toxic...I have to do this ALL by myself. It doesn't seem like anyone has an answer for me though.

 

[mistoffolees]

Thank you for your responses.

I can't afford an attorney. When I go to the legal services projects centers, a lot of them tell me they don't know, and I've even had some say, "Just divorce his current identity."

When I say, "Well, to the law, it will still look like I'm married to his first identity in the state of Florida." To which she replied, "Well, who's going to know?" That's not good enough for me.

Onto the next part, my ex is very unreliable, and extremely toxic...I have to do this ALL by myself. It doesn't seem like anyone has an answer for me though.

I'm sorry, but you really need to talk with an attorney. Many attorneys will give you an initial consultation free, so call around.

You see, the question in my mind is whether the original ID even exists any more. The fact that the DA told you to get remarried indicates to me that a simple name change would not work for some reason. And the fact that he has a new SS number and so on suggests that the original 'person' might not exist any more in any legal sense. I don't know that to be the case, but that's what I would be exploring with the attorney. If that's the case, then the advice to divorce only the current identity would be correct (although not for the reason "who would know?" which is a stupid reason).

And even if you DO have to divorce the first person, it's going to be a mess. How do you legally serve a person who doesn't exist any more? And then you have a jurisdictional issue - 'he' doesn't live in MD and you don't live in CA.

You need to find a way to speak with an attorney. Really.

Meanwhile, I have one suggestion that might help. Talk to the person at the DA's office who told you to remarry. They must have been through this before, so maybe they can tell you what to do. (Of course, it's complicated by the fact that you have several different states involved and their rules may differ). Also, ask the DA if they have any funds set up for this. AFAIK, they have some 'slush' funds set up for hidden costs for drug informants who have been given new identities. It may be possible to get them to help with the legal costs.

 

[nextwife]

You cannot link the two names together in any public filing!

 

[mistoffolees]

You cannot link the two names together in any public filing!

I don't think anyone was suggesting that. The original suggestion was to divorce both names separately.

 

[OHRoadwarrior]

The problem is whether his original identity exists or not, you did not indicate yours had been changed. Therefore, you are, as a matter of record, are married to two different people. You may need to divorce your "current" spouse and divorce, based on abandonment or some other criteria, your "former" spouse.

 

[mistoffolees]

The problem is whether his original identity exists or not, you did not indicate yours had been changed. Therefore, you are, as a matter of record, are married to two different people. You may need to divorce your "current" spouse and divorce, based on abandonment or some other criteria, your "former" spouse.

I don't think it's that simple. If the former 'person' ceased to exist, it might be the same as if he had died - which would mean that no divorce was necessary.

OP should start by talking with the DA who set this all up and then talk with an attorney who might have experience in that arena.

 

[hurtingwoman]

Hello,

Thanks for all the replies. To reply to some of them:

I was suggesting putting both names in a public filing. I don't know what else to do.

I did speak with the chief investigator that was handling his relocation case. It is a really small town in Central Coast California. I've sent them countless emails and they've only replied to tell me that they are done with his case and that it's my choice on how I decide to proceed with the divorce.

They have said before that his old identity doesn't exist at all anymore. They even gave him a new birth certificate.

The problem is, in the state of Florida, our marriage is still valid. I found it online, an image and all of our marriage license so it still looks like I'm married to him under that name.

I don't have money for an attorney. I've been to like 6 places and I keep getting an I don't know from people. It's really rough, really really rough. I just want to get it over with. I know it can't happen over night, but it has been a year since our separation, and I'm still at square one.

 

[OHRoadwarrior]

If you file as an AKA with both names, you may compromise his identity. He has a vested interest in helping you fund this, I would think.

 

[mistoffolees]

Hello,

Thanks for all the replies. To reply to some of them:

I was suggesting putting both names in a public filing. I don't know what else to do.

I did speak with the chief investigator that was handling his relocation case. It is a really small town in Central Coast California. I've sent them countless emails and they've only replied to tell me that they are done with his case and that it's my choice on how I decide to proceed with the divorce.

They have said before that his old identity doesn't exist at all anymore. They even gave him a new birth certificate.

The problem is, in the state of Florida, our marriage is still valid. I found it online, an image and all of our marriage license so it still looks like I'm married to him under that name.

I don't have money for an attorney. I've been to like 6 places and I keep getting an I don't know from people. It's really rough, really really rough. I just want to get it over with. I know it can't happen over night, but it has been a year since our separation, and I'm still at square one.

That's what I'm inclined to think, but if you're not happy with the answers, you really need to pay an attorney.

 

[hurtingwoman]

It's not that I'm not happy with the answers. I just have some fears.

What if I want to get married again someday, will this pose a problem for me? Will this make my new marriage invalid?


Also, to the person who said he has a vested interest in this, the truth is that he doesn't. My ex has refused to assist me in this matter.

Should I just get a divorce to his new identity and forget about the old one?

Do I really have a legal obligation to protect his identity change if the DA told me through email that the choice is mine on how I want to proceed? They literally said I can choose to seal or not seal it. That doesn't make sense, but I have proof of them saying that.

 

[LdiJ]

It's not that I'm not happy with the answers. I just have some fears.

What if I want to get married again someday, will this pose a problem for me? Will this make my new marriage invalid?


Also, to the person who said he has a vested interest in this, the truth is that he doesn't. My ex has refused to assist me in this matter.

Should I just get a divorce to his new identity and forget about the old one?

Do I really have a legal obligation to protect his identity change if the DA told me through email that the choice is mine on how I want to proceed? They literally said I can choose to seal or not seal it. That doesn't make sense, but I have proof of them saying that.

I think that we are possibly making this more complicated that it really is. He is the same person no matter what name he is using, therefore you only need to divorce him once, in his current legal identity.

If the issue ever arises where an explanation needs to be made, then you explain the situation.

 

[mistoffolees]

It's not that I'm not happy with the answers. I just have some fears.

That's because the answer isn't clear and/or the people here don't have experience with this particular issue.

You really need to speak with an attorney who is familiar with this type of issue. Ultimately, the fact that you don't get a clear answer either from us or from the legal aid people you've talked to suggests that you need to keep digging.

Or, keep pushing the DA's office. Ask to speak to someone who can answer your question - a supervisor or ombudsman.

It's your life. If you want to gamble, you can always try one of the suggestions:

LD's suggestion of only divorcing the current one makes some sense - and goes along with what I believe (that the former 'person' no longer exists and would have no legal standing to get a divorce at all). Alternatively, you could divorce both 'people' (although if someone picks up on it, you might have to answer questions as to how you're married to two different people at the same time, so I don't think I'd go there). I would NOT link both names together via AKA. It could endanger his life and possibly even yours. Besides, I wouldn't be surprised if there's some kind of law against releasing the identity of someone in the witness protection program.

I'm really sorry that no one has a definitive answer. I think it's likely that if you follow LD and my advice to simply divorce the current husband that you'd be OK, but I'm just not sure enough to be confident.