What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Virginia... I married my spouse in the state of Virginia in November of 2010.Were both from Texas however I’m military and stationed here in VA. My spouse and I were married 9mths before we separated and she lived with me here in VA for only 6mths of our marriage. At the time of our separation she was pregnant with our 1st child and has since given birth. We have decided to file for divorce in Texas since she and our child live there. I know Virginia requires we wait 1 year before filing for divorce but since Texas does not can we go ahead and proceed with filing in Texas or do we still have to wait the required year by Virginia since we were married there? If we have to wait the required time what should I be doing now to prepare for filing for divorce next July when we’ve been separated for a year?
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Do I have to abid by the laws of the state I was Marrie din or the state Im filing in
- Thread starter bryan2011
- Start date
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LdiJ
Senior Member
If you file in TX, TX law applies.
mistoffolees
Senior Member
You have to follow ALL of the Texas laws. There is no one year waiting period in TX, so you can ignore that. You do, however, have to meet the TX residency requirements:
Texas Divorce Laws - Fault and No Fault Divorce Grounds, Residency Laws, Filing Information, and Waiting Period
If you meet the requirements to file in TX, then you can file whenever you want.
mistoffolees
Senior Member
It's contested if the other party doesn't agree with the documents you file and/or the terms of the divorce.
Seriously, if you want someone to hold your hand every step of the way, you need to hire an attorney.
garrula lingua
Senior Member
Bryan,
Your wife can file in TX, as long as she has lived in Tx for at least six months prior to filing, and three months (90 days) in the county in which she files.
You can sign a waiver, instead of having the Court, or a private process server company serve you with the Citation and Petition.
If you are both savy, you may, both, be able to do the divorce, pro se (representing yourself). Some attorneys may review your docs for you, and advise you as to property division, child support and medical support (both calculation and necessary wording in your Divorce Decree). Attorneys who advertise as "Collaborative Law' specialize in that (but be careful of the rates, & any Family Law attorney can do this, also).
Be careful of attorneys who advertise fifteen areas of expertise: Family Law, Criminal Law, Bankruptcy, Estate Planning, etc. You want someone who knows Family Law very well, and can pound out your Pleadings in half an hour, not someone you're paying to learn how to do them.
Only Mom has to appear in Court, if there is an Agreed Divorce (both of you sign the Divorce Decree). Some Judges don't require a court appearance by either spouse, if there is an agreed (signed by both) Divorce Decree. (If Mom has to appear, it's usually just to recite jurisdictional facts, and info re dates, children, support on the record - a brief appearance).
Tx requires a minimum 60 day wait, after filing of the Petition, before a Divorce can be granted (use 61 days to set the final hearing).
You both have to wait 30 days after the Judge grants the Divorce, before either of you can remarry (you can ask for a waiver of the waiting period, but that may require a court appearance for that purpose).
Be careful of attorney charges - they vary greatly on uncontested divorces. Also be aware - if you hire an attorney, make sure the fee agreement includes court appearance and attorney being the attorney of record on the pleadings. Some attorneys advertise very low 'uncontested divorce' rates, but they only do the paperwork and fill it out with the party as pro se - they don't appear in court, and they don't follow the case to ensure all is filed properly and set the hearing, etc.
IMHO, a reasonable rate for an uncontested divorce with c/s, m/s, and little community property, shouldn't be more than $600, with an additional $250 for court filing fees - $850. total. But, that is just my humble opinion.
(Prices vary according to area, but it shouldn't be much higher, and you can find lower prices). Your wife should call various family law attorneys in her county and price 'uncontested divorces'.
She should be sure to note what services are being offered by the attorney, so she can compare them: complete attorney representation (attorney is the 'attorney of record', the attorney will do the Petition, a waiver for you to sign (watch the wording - you want notice of all hearings, and only proceed with your signature on the agreement, or hearing with distribution by Judge. You're not waiving notice of future hearings, or allowing wife to proceed without your participation), possibly an Agreement Incident to Divorce, and an Agreed Divorce Decree.
Your waiver should include the statement that you are active duty military, and are waiving your rights under the Servicepersons Civil Relief Act.
There are a few publications regarding 'Do Your Own Tx Divorce'. Even if you are going to hire an attorney, it is a good idea to purchase or read one of these books to better understand the process and what the Court needs from the parties.
It is, always, advisable to hire an attorney. However, for some people, it's just not an available option. Be careful that you understand what you are signing (both present and future impact).
If you can't afford to hire an attorney to fully represent you, it is advisable to pay a Tx attorney for a few hours to go over your paperwork or advise you regarding the process - they can do that by email or phone (email is better - you can refer to email later). Also, many courts allow a telephonic appearance by out-of-state litigants.
Good luck.
Your wife can file in TX, as long as she has lived in Tx for at least six months prior to filing, and three months (90 days) in the county in which she files.
You can sign a waiver, instead of having the Court, or a private process server company serve you with the Citation and Petition.
If you are both savy, you may, both, be able to do the divorce, pro se (representing yourself). Some attorneys may review your docs for you, and advise you as to property division, child support and medical support (both calculation and necessary wording in your Divorce Decree). Attorneys who advertise as "Collaborative Law' specialize in that (but be careful of the rates, & any Family Law attorney can do this, also).
Be careful of attorneys who advertise fifteen areas of expertise: Family Law, Criminal Law, Bankruptcy, Estate Planning, etc. You want someone who knows Family Law very well, and can pound out your Pleadings in half an hour, not someone you're paying to learn how to do them.
Only Mom has to appear in Court, if there is an Agreed Divorce (both of you sign the Divorce Decree). Some Judges don't require a court appearance by either spouse, if there is an agreed (signed by both) Divorce Decree. (If Mom has to appear, it's usually just to recite jurisdictional facts, and info re dates, children, support on the record - a brief appearance).
Tx requires a minimum 60 day wait, after filing of the Petition, before a Divorce can be granted (use 61 days to set the final hearing).
You both have to wait 30 days after the Judge grants the Divorce, before either of you can remarry (you can ask for a waiver of the waiting period, but that may require a court appearance for that purpose).
Be careful of attorney charges - they vary greatly on uncontested divorces. Also be aware - if you hire an attorney, make sure the fee agreement includes court appearance and attorney being the attorney of record on the pleadings. Some attorneys advertise very low 'uncontested divorce' rates, but they only do the paperwork and fill it out with the party as pro se - they don't appear in court, and they don't follow the case to ensure all is filed properly and set the hearing, etc.
IMHO, a reasonable rate for an uncontested divorce with c/s, m/s, and little community property, shouldn't be more than $600, with an additional $250 for court filing fees - $850. total. But, that is just my humble opinion.
(Prices vary according to area, but it shouldn't be much higher, and you can find lower prices). Your wife should call various family law attorneys in her county and price 'uncontested divorces'.
She should be sure to note what services are being offered by the attorney, so she can compare them: complete attorney representation (attorney is the 'attorney of record', the attorney will do the Petition, a waiver for you to sign (watch the wording - you want notice of all hearings, and only proceed with your signature on the agreement, or hearing with distribution by Judge. You're not waiving notice of future hearings, or allowing wife to proceed without your participation), possibly an Agreement Incident to Divorce, and an Agreed Divorce Decree.
Your waiver should include the statement that you are active duty military, and are waiving your rights under the Servicepersons Civil Relief Act.
There are a few publications regarding 'Do Your Own Tx Divorce'. Even if you are going to hire an attorney, it is a good idea to purchase or read one of these books to better understand the process and what the Court needs from the parties.
It is, always, advisable to hire an attorney. However, for some people, it's just not an available option. Be careful that you understand what you are signing (both present and future impact).
If you can't afford to hire an attorney to fully represent you, it is advisable to pay a Tx attorney for a few hours to go over your paperwork or advise you regarding the process - they can do that by email or phone (email is better - you can refer to email later). Also, many courts allow a telephonic appearance by out-of-state litigants.
Good luck.
Last edited:
Thamks garrula lingua...You just cleared a lot of my questions up. I only have more one concern and that’s that my wife may change her mind and contest out divorce. But I don’t know what grounds she would do that on. We have no joint property or anything to split, I’m fine with her having physical custody of our daughter and just my basic rights of visitation. So can she contest our divorce just because she doesn’t want things to be easy “for me”?
mistoffolees
Senior Member
As I read the rules, either one can file as long as one of them meets the residency requirements:
Texas Divorce Source: State Divorce Laws: Texas
Of course, if it's uncontested and they agree on everything, it's easier for the TX resident to be the one to file.
LdiJ
Senior Member
In order to contest a divorce there has to been something to disagree about. You have no property to split so there is nothing to disagree about there. You plan on not contesting her having custody so there is nothing to disagree about there. That leaves child support and visitation. Child support should be guideline, so there really isn't anything to contest there, and TX has standard visitation guidelines for children, so really, nothing to contest there either.
garrula lingua
Senior Member
Ldij wrote:
"In order to contest a divorce there has to been something to disagree about. You have no property to split so there is nothing to disagree about there. You plan on not contesting her having custody so there is nothing to disagree about there. That leaves child support and visitation. Child support should be guideline, so there really isn't anything to contest there, and TX has standard visitation guidelines for children, so really, nothing to contest there either. "
This is NOT TRUE.
I've seen cases drag on for two years without a real issue of dispute.
If litigants want to fight (or even just one wants to), it's amazing how long a divorce can be dragged out (especially if both parties are paying the legal fee bills).
Often, when both parties are at the end of their available finances, the case will settle.
People can dispute absolute crap, and keep a case rolling - I've had visitation disputes with the family dog, 40 year old tupperware disputed (42 year marriage in divorce), arguments regarding place of pick-up/drop-off of child, who will fly with child, who will pay. Some property disputes that cost thousands in atty fees involved a few hundred dollars worth of property.
Some people will fight - period.
Even when they get all they wanted, needed or could get legally.
Bryan,
Also, in Tx, there are separate possession and access code sections for active duty military (and there was a change this past Sept., 2011). I'll send you a PM regarding the current law, Bryan.
You may have some issues with child support calculation, due to BAQ & Subsistance & locality pay, etc. You should be able to deduct for your uniforms.
Yes, Bryan, often people begin uncontested, and after thinking (and after speaking with an attorney) it becomes contested.
A Collaborative attorney is under a commitment to only try to resolve all the issues, and prepare the paperwork. If either party contests, that Collaborative attorney cannot represent either party in court. Each party has to hire a new attorney if there is contested litigation.
In all honesty, it is best to have an attorney, especially as you are out of the area. You can check that area of Texas for family law attorneys (those you confer with cannot, ethically, be hired by your wife). You may want to have an attorney who is located in your wife's county review your situation (pay for two hours of advice), and see if they will fully represent you, if needed.
PM me if you have additional questions.
I work pro bono for veterans in Family Law court.
Good luck.
"In order to contest a divorce there has to been something to disagree about. You have no property to split so there is nothing to disagree about there. You plan on not contesting her having custody so there is nothing to disagree about there. That leaves child support and visitation. Child support should be guideline, so there really isn't anything to contest there, and TX has standard visitation guidelines for children, so really, nothing to contest there either. "
This is NOT TRUE.
I've seen cases drag on for two years without a real issue of dispute.
If litigants want to fight (or even just one wants to), it's amazing how long a divorce can be dragged out (especially if both parties are paying the legal fee bills).
Often, when both parties are at the end of their available finances, the case will settle.
People can dispute absolute crap, and keep a case rolling - I've had visitation disputes with the family dog, 40 year old tupperware disputed (42 year marriage in divorce), arguments regarding place of pick-up/drop-off of child, who will fly with child, who will pay. Some property disputes that cost thousands in atty fees involved a few hundred dollars worth of property.
Some people will fight - period.
Even when they get all they wanted, needed or could get legally.
Bryan,
Also, in Tx, there are separate possession and access code sections for active duty military (and there was a change this past Sept., 2011). I'll send you a PM regarding the current law, Bryan.
You may have some issues with child support calculation, due to BAQ & Subsistance & locality pay, etc. You should be able to deduct for your uniforms.
Yes, Bryan, often people begin uncontested, and after thinking (and after speaking with an attorney) it becomes contested.
A Collaborative attorney is under a commitment to only try to resolve all the issues, and prepare the paperwork. If either party contests, that Collaborative attorney cannot represent either party in court. Each party has to hire a new attorney if there is contested litigation.
In all honesty, it is best to have an attorney, especially as you are out of the area. You can check that area of Texas for family law attorneys (those you confer with cannot, ethically, be hired by your wife). You may want to have an attorney who is located in your wife's county review your situation (pay for two hours of advice), and see if they will fully represent you, if needed.
PM me if you have additional questions.
I work pro bono for veterans in Family Law court.
Good luck.
garrula lingua
Senior Member
Well, Misto,
Yes, as a licensed attorney in Texas, who, unfortunately has done a heck of lot of divorces (destroying the American dream, one family at a time), I know the Family Code very well.
But, thank you for telling me what I know. You never know when you can learn something.
I'm not sure how your info helps Bryan:
As Bryan said his wife was moving to Tx, let her file as Petitioner (ergo, she will appear in Court for the final hearing if it's uncontested & he doesn't have to appear).
Indeed, either party can file if they qualify under the Code (in all our great states).
Bryan has an additonal argument that Texas is his domicile, and his military service is just a temporary absence.
But it's best to keep it simple (KISS). Don't file something you have to additionally prove up, unless it's necessary (especially to a Judge who is hearing criminal cases, personal injury cases, high-end tort cases, and your divorce in the middle.)
Let wife file, Bryan sign an adequate waiver (waste of money fighting service), and proceed either uncontested or contested.
Bryan, PM me if I can help you further.
For further info, the State Bar of Texas has a pretty good video explaining the process (a project by Young Lawyers Assoc.)
Good luck, and thank you for your service.
On the 11th hour, of the 11th day, of the 11th month, of the 11th year ... we shall thank all our military: active, retired, veterans. God bless.
LdiJ
Senior Member
You just verified what I said...in order to contest, there has to be something to disagree about. Now, you are pointing out that things can get ridiculous and people can disagree/fight about really trivial things, but still, there has to be something to disagree about.
Since the OP's wife is the one who is going to be doing the filing, if HE doesn't contest, if HE doesn't disagree about anything, it won't be a contested divorce. She cannot make it a contested divorce all by herself.
mistoffolees
Senior Member
You posted something that was incomplete. In fact, your post was misleading because it suggested that only the wife could file in this case. I simply filled in the gaps by clarifying your post. What's your problem?
You see, even if it doesn't help OP, there are probably hundreds of people reading this site for every one who posts. Therefore, having the complete information is useful.
That's absolutely true. However:
1. I've seen cases where even though the wife could just as easily file (as you suggest), she might refuse to - either for moral or financial reasons (people claim that they can't afford to file all the time). I was just letting OP know that even if his wife wouldn't file, he could still do so.
2. As stated above, a lot of other people read this forum and it is useful to many of them to have the full information rather than a limited subset that you think is applicable to this case.
So why are you so prickly lately?
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