ex refuses to sign custody order

[Proserpina]

Then be prepared for hubby to spend some time in jail if Mom decides to ask for the child to be returned and Dad refuses.

Absolutely.

Why the heck is this child being allowed to call the shots?

Who are the parents here...Mom & Dad, or the child?

 

[CJane]

Hi.
Thank you all for your input.
Some more information:
The child has made it very clear to everyone involved that he Will not go back to his mothers. About a year ago the child was in the same situation but staying with his grandparents and refused to get in the car with mum. The situation ended with the Sheriff being called and the child was physically forced into the car with the mother. We do NOT ever want to end up in that situation again.
Arrears as claimed by mother: 55000' by father 25 000 and CSE 22000.
It is half childsupport and half school fees due to the verbal agreement. And trust me, My Husband has learnt his lesson and will never make that misstake again.
When my Husband worked in Boston he was paying 5000 à month in CS. Working in Georgia he now pays 1250 and 100 towards the arrears.

The father can not sit back and not file for custody since that would only mean he pays the mother 1350 à month but only 100 goes towards the arrears. How would he ever be able to pay back the outstanding amount?

How. Much. Is. Your. Husband. Ordered. To. Pay. In. Child. Support?

How. Much. Does. He. Actually. Pay?

Where. In. The. Order. Is. Tuition. Addressed?

Please. Have. Your. Husband. Pay. Us. A. Visit.

Good. Lord.

 

[Proserpina]

How. Much. Is. Your. Husband. Ordered. To. Pay. In. Child. Support?

How. Much. Does. He. Actually. Pay?

Where. In. The. Order. Is. Tuition. Addressed?

Please. Have. Your. Husband. Pay. Us. A. Visit.

Good. Lord.

Must refrain from making a joke about periods.

 

[Just Blue]

Must refrain from making a joke about periods.

No bloody jokes!

 

[C.Z]

I did not relize it was such a problem that the step parent ask the questions. My husband at the moment works 12 hours a day 7 days a week due to an emergency in a local power plant, therefore I handle all the issues with the custody right now.
I have handled most of the paperwork regarding all the children for the last year and it has never been a problem before...
The school contacts me when there is an issue with the child and I handle the contacts with courts lawyers and child enforcment agency.
What is unclear about the CS? As I wrote he pays 1350 a month, 1250 is Cs 100 is towards arrears. Is anything unclear about that? The amount was set in 2007 and is towards both children.
The first court case was in 2007 and the sum the court orded my husband to pay was 35000. He has since paid part of that. Then there has been several turns in the court and as have tried to explain there has still been no ruling due to a long list of events.
The boy who is now twelve is not the one in charge at our house. He does not want to go back to his mothers house and this is why we want the custody issue resolved. We are fully aware that the father has no legal right to stop the mother from collecting the child if she so wants.
I would appriciate advice on if my husband should go ahead and file for custody in the court on Monday or because of the issue with CS should push for the mother to sign the parenting plan?

 

[CJane]

What is unclear about the CS? As I wrote he pays 1350 a month, 1250 is Cs 100 is towards arrears. Is anything unclear about that? The amount was set in 2007 and is towards both children.

The first court case was in 2007 and the sum the court orded my husband to pay was 35000. He has since paid part of that. Then there has been several turns in the court and as have tried to explain there has still been no ruling due to a long list of events.

What is unclear is how he ended up $35000 in arrears over the course of 3 or 4 years when his obligation AS ORDERED BY THE COURT was only $1250/month.

And why he WAS paying $5000/month PRIOR to the $1250/month, but YOU state that the $1250 ordered in 2007 was the FIRST COURT HEARING.

But they've been divorced for 9 years.

And he's behind on tuition payments too. Except you refuse to state what the order actually SAYS about tuition.

I would appriciate advice on if my husband should go ahead and file for custody in the court on Monday or because of the issue with CS should push for the mother to sign the parenting plan?

You've been advised that the child support issue should be handled FIRST.

And, you say you've handled all this stuff for a year and there have been 'no problems'. But from where I'M sitting? There are more problems than solutions. And more than a few of them are likely caused by someone with no stake but all kinds of 'interest' trying to run something that doesn't concern them while the person it DOES concern is doing something that HE considers more important than handling his mess.

 

[C.Z]

The childsupport was 5000 a month until the ruling in 2007, then it was altered to 1250.



The order said he had to repay the tuition as the divorce decree stated that the father was to pay tuition for private school. There has been no missunderstanding about this. The father has been paying towards the arrearages since 2007.

The disagreement regarding the diffrences in outstanding demands is due to the 1 year the mother claims the children went to private school but they did actually attend a public school.
Also there is a disagreement on how interest should be calculated.
In Georgia the interest on backsupport is now 7% but was 12% up till 2008. The mother wants 12% as the debt incurred before 2008 whilst the father claims he should pay 7% after the date when the interest was changed.




I would like some more comments about wether the father should settle the issue with CS first or file for custody first. From someone else please.

 

[stealth2]

I would like some more comments about weather we should settle the issue with CS first or file for custody first. From someone else please.

WE shouldn't do anything. And the weather here is fine.

 

[C.Z]

Sorry Mr Stealth..
English is not my first language and the spelling corrector don't pick up on everything...
What, in your opinion, should the father do.

The father has via the lawyers tried to reach an agreement with the mother. The mother was going to sign the parenting plan and "hand over" primary custody to the father. We have now waited for 2 month since the last contacts for the mother to sign but she refuses to sign if the father does not agree to her number on the arrearges.

The father would have prefered to get this resolved by mutul agreement with the mother but the clock is ticking and nothing is happening.

Our lawyer advised us late last night that we should file for custody on tuesday next week if nothing has happened until then since the mother has not replied to her lawyers questions.

 

[Just Blue]

Sorry Mr Stealth..
English is not my first language and the spelling corrector don't pick up on everything...
What, in your opinion, should the father do.

The father has via the lawyers tried to reach an agreement with the mother. The mother was going to sign the parenting plan and "hand over" primary custody to the father. We have now waited for 2 month since the last contacts for the mother to sign but she refuses to sign if the father does not agree to her number on the arrearges.

The father would have prefered to get this resolved by mutul agreement with the mother but the clock is ticking and nothing is happening.

Our lawyer advised us late last night that we should file for custody on tuesday next week if nothing has happened until then since the mother has not replied to her lawyers questions.

Really? An attorney told YOU to file for custody of a child that is not yours?

 

[DownTime]

Go to the children's current school and obtain copies of their transcripts. All schools ever attended will be there, with dates. This will clear up that extra year and tuition issue as a yes or a no.

Get copies of everything the father has paid. Hard proof he paid it.

Present these valid proofs to the Mother. She can argue with facts all she likes. Or even Dad can, if he's actually wrong.

Point being, bickering has no place in CS. Facts matter more, and if you have proof of 3 years and not 4, it's a non-issue.

Dad will be paying what he was ordered to until another order replaces it. Period, end of conversation.

Even if you don't get to the custody change for another year. He may as well accept that and move forward, so that everyone can.

 

[stealth2]

Dad should either follow his attorney's advice, or seek the advice of a different attorney. You can do nothing. There is no we. It really IS as simple as that.

ETA - and it's MS stealth to you.

 

[C.Z]

Thank you all for taking the time to give advice in this matter.


Now just so I understand you all correctly?

You all do agree that is better for the father to let the mother keep primary custody of the child and continue paying her full child support altough the child is residing full time with the father and is being fully supported by the father without any economical contribution from the mother.
And this is so because the father owes the mother backsupport that is under dispute at the moment?

 

[Ohiogal]

Thank you all for taking the time to give advice in this matter.


Now just so I understand you all correctly?

You all do agree that is better for the father to let the mother keep primary custody of the child and continue paying her full child support altough the child is residing full time with the father and is being fully supported by the father without any economical contribution from the mother.
And this is so because the father owes the mother backsupport that is under dispute at the moment?

Thank you for clarifying that you have NO ability to comprehend. NONE at ALL!

 

[C.Z]

Thank you Ohiogal for your friendly answer.
I guess your opinion is not the same as CJane.
What is your suggestion that the father does?
In your earlier post you tought the custody issue could be handled seperatly from the arrears issue.
I would be extremly interested in your opinion.