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inquiry1

Junior Member
What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?
OR


Hello,

So here's my predicament. I moved in with my girlfriend at the time about a year ago.. she was having trouble with her dorm situation at school, so I told her she could stay with me (since she was a lot anyway) until she found an apartment for herself. About 7 months into our relationship, we decided that we wanted to live together for the time being and that she offered to pay for rent for the next 7 months or so since I had paid and had been paying for rent and most of groceries/living expenses until that point. Bottom line is.. she never gave me one cent towards rent. Month after month I fronted the rent and she agreed to put it on her tab and she would pay me back. She was supposedly having trouble at the bank with some fraudulent activity. I trusted her, and figured when this all got figured out she would just take money out (that a family member had supposedly transferred to her) and pay me back. Within the past week, I told her I couldn't wait any longer (yes it wasn't the first time I said that), and that if the money didn't show up I had to give notice on the apartment since the lease was up at the end of 2011. The money still didn't come through, so I gave notice. We had LOTS of things come up where we got in fights regarding family, money, etc. etc. It got to the point where I told her I thought she should stay at a friends until she could prove that she wasn't lying and we could figure all of this out. She agreed calmly at first, and then came all of the blame for "not trusting her", even though when we went to the bank they had NO record of her ever having an account there other than a student loan from a few years ago. On top of which, I spoke to the family member who was the one who "gave her money" and had been helping her throughout our relationship with various personal matters, and he said that he barely new who she was and they had not had any contact in a few years. I really started calling her out on this, although I did it in a way that said "I believe you, just prove it to me and then you can be angry and of course I will apologize" type of thing. She couldn't prove it, wound up getting into a big fight where she once again blamed everything on me and my family, and left. I came back soon after to the apartment to find that not only had she left, but a significant amount of money that I had kept in the apartment from way before I met her was gone along with a few sentimental items to me that may have been worth something as well. She denies it ALL.. although there is not ANY other way that the money and items could have gone missing. They were buried in a random box that only I knew where they were, and she was the only one that was ever alone in the apartment. Everything was in the place I had left it; except for what was missing.

Is there anything I can do?? Please let me know of your advice.. I have been severely screwed over, and put into a situation that I have to evacuate the apartment while putting my life back together, and obviously the missing financial piece that was both stolen, and not paid back to me from 7 months of rent is not there and having a big impact on the bills.

Thank you!
 


Proserpina

Senior Member
You were paying the rent every month regardless, correct?

What proof do you have that you had any money in a secret box in the apartment?
 

inquiry1

Junior Member
You were paying the rent every month regardless, correct?

What proof do you have that you had any money in a secret box in the apartment?
Yes I was paying the rent every month.. things might have changed at the point where she told me she would start paying if I had known she wouldn't come through obviously but yes to your question.

To be completely honest, I have no proof other than it's not there anymore. That's why I don't know what to do. One of the things she took were some old coins that had been past down to me which I have a list of what they were.. but other than an empty envelope from the bank I unfortunately have no hard proof :(
She has been on the electric bill for the past 4 or 5 months, but I was the only one on the lease since it was my apartment to begin with.
 

mistoffolees

Senior Member
Yes I was paying the rent every month.. things might have changed at the point where she told me she would start paying if I had known she wouldn't come through obviously but yes to your question.

To be completely honest, I have no proof other than it's not there anymore. That's why I don't know what to do. One of the things she took were some old coins that had been past down to me which I have a list of what they were.. but other than an empty envelope from the bank I unfortunately have no hard proof :(
She has been on the electric bill for the past 4 or 5 months, but I was the only one on the lease since it was my apartment to begin with.
The answer is simple. If you think she took your things and isn't carrying her weight, then you have 2 options:
1. Accept the fact that you will always be a provider and that she's not trustworthy.
2. Ask her to leave. If she won't leave, you will have to go through a formal eviction process.
3. Sit down and talk with her about responsibilities and tell her that you expect her to carry her weight and if she doesn't, you're going to have to end the relationship.
Of course, you could ask her about the coins, either way.
 

inquiry1

Junior Member
The answer is simple. If you think she took your things and isn't carrying her weight, then you have 2 options:
1. Accept the fact that you will always be a provider and that she's not trustworthy.
2. Ask her to leave. If she won't leave, you will have to go through a formal eviction process.
3. Sit down and talk with her about responsibilities and tell her that you expect her to carry her weight and if she doesn't, you're going to have to end the relationship.
Of course, you could ask her about the coins, either way.
Thanks for your response!

She has already left.. I made it pretty clear that I didn't trust her anymore. There is no other way I can think of that my money and coins would have gone missing due to their location and the people we had in the apartment over the past year. When asked; she denies it all with an "I don't know what you're talking about"

If I could get her to admit to even agreeing to pay rent for the past 7 months.. would I have anything to go on legally??
 

Proserpina

Senior Member
Thanks for your response!

She has already left.. I made it pretty clear that I didn't trust her anymore. There is no other way I can think of that my money and coins would have gone missing due to their location and the people we had in the apartment over the past year. When asked; she denies it all with an "I don't know what you're talking about"

If I could get her to admit to even agreeing to pay rent for the past 7 months.. would I have anything to go on legally??


Honestly?

I think you're better off letting this go.

Even if you sue her and obtain a judgment, it's not likely that you'd be able to collect.
 

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