My lawyer seems to be working more for my X2B

[spinkitten]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Oklahoma

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Oklahoma

I drove 5 hours to attend my divorce hearing, things happened so fast I had no idea what was going on, I didnt even hear the judge say one word. Next thing I know my lawyer is turning his back on me, I got his attention and wanted to know what was going on, he then turned to my husband who was standing right there and asked him if he was going to try and get an attorney, of course he said yes but I ever doubt this will happen. I asked my lawyer that I would like to at least get my animals, he asked my husband if I could get them, my husband got right in my face, sneered at me and said "NO!" mind you I have a protective order against my husband.

My lawyer told me that he gave a promise to the board that he would be fair, and that my x2b was not given a chance to obtain a lawyer, Ummm when you get served to be in court isnt that your "warning" to get a lawyer?

My lawyer also told me not to expect much when it comes to child support because my x2b is only making minimum wage, Umm HELLO?! Not my problem, if my x2b has to work 3 jobs to pay his part then thats what needs to be done.

Also I am now a resident of another state and wondering if I could file for divorce here. I cant afford to keep driving over a thousand miles every time.

I'm really upset, at least my lawyer could have done was set me aside and explain to me what was going on, my lawyer talked more with my x2b than me, I feel he is working more for my x2b than ME.

Should I complain?

 

[Zigner]

Duplicate Post: https://forum.freeadvice.com/legal-ethics-lawyer-malpractice-89/legal-aid-lawyer-not-helping-me-should-i-complain-571790.html

 

[mistoffolees]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Oklahoma

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Oklahoma

I drove 5 hours to attend my divorce hearing, things happened so fast I had no idea what was going on, I didnt even hear the judge say one word. Next thing I know my lawyer is turning his back on me, I got his attention and wanted to know what was going on, he then turned to my husband who was standing right there and asked him if he was going to try and get an attorney, of course he said yes but I ever doubt this will happen. I asked my lawyer that I would like to at least get my animals, he asked my husband if I could get them, my husband got right in my face, sneered at me and said "NO!" mind you I have a protective order against my husband.

My lawyer told me that he gave a promise to the board that he would be fair, and that my x2b was not given a chance to obtain a lawyer, Ummm when you get served to be in court isnt that your "warning" to get a lawyer?

My lawyer also told me not to expect much when it comes to child support because my x2b is only making minimum wage, Umm HELLO?! Not my problem, if my x2b has to work 3 jobs to pay his part then thats what needs to be done.

Also I am now a resident of another state and wondering if I could file for divorce here. I cant afford to keep driving over a thousand miles every time.

I'm really upset, at least my lawyer could have done was set me aside and explain to me what was going on, my lawyer talked more with my x2b than me, I feel he is working more for my x2b than ME.

Should I complain?

You really need to pay attention to what's going on. Since I wasn't there, I can't be sure what happened, but my guess is that the court allowed a continuance to give your stbx time to hire an attorney and your attorney just wanted to find out what stbx's plans are. There's nothing illegal or unethical about that.

And since the court didn't rule on the animals, your ex may be correct (again, without knowing all the circumstances, it's hard to know exactly what happened).

 

[Ohiogal]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Oklahoma

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Oklahoma

I drove 5 hours to attend my divorce hearing, things happened so fast I had no idea what was going on, I didnt even hear the judge say one word. Next thing I know my lawyer is turning his back on me, I got his attention and wanted to know what was going on, he then turned to my husband who was standing right there and asked him if he was going to try and get an attorney, of course he said yes but I ever doubt this will happen. I asked my lawyer that I would like to at least get my animals, he asked my husband if I could get them, my husband got right in my face, sneered at me and said "NO!" mind you I have a protective order against my husband.

My lawyer told me that he gave a promise to the board that he would be fair, and that my x2b was not given a chance to obtain a lawyer, Ummm when you get served to be in court isnt that your "warning" to get a lawyer?

My lawyer also told me not to expect much when it comes to child support because my x2b is only making minimum wage, Umm HELLO?! Not my problem, if my x2b has to work 3 jobs to pay his part then thats what needs to be done.

Also I am now a resident of another state and wondering if I could file for divorce here. I cant afford to keep driving over a thousand miles every time.

I'm really upset, at least my lawyer could have done was set me aside and explain to me what was going on, my lawyer talked more with my x2b than me, I feel he is working more for my x2b than ME.

Should I complain?

A) Why did you leave your animals (if they are yours) when you left? WEre they purchased during the marriage? If so then they are marital PROPERTY.
B) Your ex is NOT going to be forced to work three jobs. How many jobs do you work? Child support will be based on minimum wage full time most likely. Deal with it. He doesn't have to pay you more money than that just because you feel you deserve it.
C) Jurisdiction is already in the state where this divorce was filed. You can't forum shop. Why did you file in Oklahoma if that was not convenient for you? How long have you been in the new state?
D) You qualify for legal aid and you are complaining your ex won't give you enough money and he can work three jobs? Seems to me that you are not exactly earning a whole heck of a lot. Pot, meet kettle.

 

[spinkitten]

Forgive me about doing a duplicate post, just had several questions about different topics.

Things happened so fast I didnt even have the time to pay attention. My lawyer told me on the phone this would be an open and shut case, not to worry.

When I moved out we had an agreement that he would take care of the pets for a certain ammt of time and I would come and get them. Come to find out after this court hearing he gave them away without my knowledge, I find that pretty sad since one of the pets was our child's. Our child was given this animal and has taken care of it since the animal was 6 weeks old. Also x2b destroyed things I was coming back for, things that I have had since I was a baby, also our childs things.

With all the documented abuse my child and I endured I feel like I should be my lawyers priority. There is no property involved i.e. house, car.. He has broken the protective order twice the only reason he is saying he is going to get an attorney is to delay things, have control over my life.

I truly believed he would take care of the pets, this agreement went on in front of a social worker, she was there that day to make sure my child and I got out of there safe. He pays support for his other child, and it was never modified when his pay rate changed, in fact every 3 years the support goes up.

Ive been in the new state for 4 months. I called my OK lawyer right after my PO order, I was under the impression that if I wanted a divorce right away that this was the route to go. Then about 4 weeks later I get a letter in the mail from the lawyer that helped me with the PO letting me know he would be happy to assist me with the divorce. I'm on a fixed income and have not gotten one penny for child support. This is not all about me but our child. What our child has been through with his father and the fact he already has a disability, the child deserves something.

Just because I qualify for legal aid and my income is not the highest doesnt mean I should be treated any different with opposite circumstances. I'm supporting 110% our child and the fact i'm on a fixed income I'm managing fairly well. But it sure would be a lot better for him to help out.

 

[Ohiogal]

Forgive me about doing a duplicate post, just had several questions about different topics.

Things happened so fast I didnt even have the time to pay attention. My lawyer told me on the phone this would be an open and shut case, not to worry.

When I moved out we had an agreement that he would take care of the pets for a certain ammt of time and I would come and get them. Come to find out after this court hearing he gave them away without my knowledge, I find that pretty sad since one of the pets was our child's. Also x2b destroyed things I was coming back for, things that I have had since I was a baby, also our childs things.

With all the documented abuse my child and I endured I feel like I should be my lawyers priority. There is no property involved i.e. house, car.. He has broken the protective order twice the only reason he is saying he is going to get an attorney is to delay things, have control over my life.

Pets are MARITAL PROPERTY. They belonged to both of you. As for you being your lawyer's priority -- how do you figure? You are one of dozens if not hundreds of cases your attorney has. Again, you haven't answered HALF of my questions at least.

Quite frankly, your x2b as you put it has every right to get an attorney. EVERY RIGHT. To control you? YOu seem to have a high opinion of yourself. Now will you answer my questions:


A) Why did you leave your animals (if they are yours) when you left? WEre they purchased during the marriage? If so then they are marital PROPERTY.
B) Your ex is NOT going to be forced to work three jobs. How many jobs do you work? Child support will be based on minimum wage full time most likely. Deal with it. He doesn't have to pay you more money than that just because you feel you deserve it.
C) Jurisdiction is already in the state where this divorce was filed. You can't forum shop. Why did you file in Oklahoma if that was not convenient for you? How long have you been in the new state?
D) You qualify for legal aid and you are complaining your ex won't give you enough money and he can work three jobs? Seems to me that you are not exactly earning a whole heck of a lot. Pot, meet kettle.

 

[mistoffolees]

Forgive me about doing a duplicate post, just had several questions about different topics.

Things happened so fast I didnt even have the time to pay attention. My lawyer told me on the phone this would be an open and shut case, not to worry.

When I moved out we had an agreement that he would take care of the pets for a certain ammt of time and I would come and get them. Come to find out after this court hearing he gave them away without my knowledge, I find that pretty sad since one of the pets was our child's. Also x2b destroyed things I was coming back for, things that I have had since I was a baby, also our childs things.

With all the documented abuse my child and I endured I feel like I should be my lawyers priority. There is no property involved i.e. house, car.. He has broken the protective order twice the only reason he is saying he is going to get an attorney is to delay things, have control over my life.

In addition to all the information OG has given you, I would strongly suggest that you spend some time reading this forum to see how things work.

Your ex has every bit as much right to the animals as you do. I don't care what you agreed to - unless it was signed by a judge it was a waste of time in terms of being able to enforce it. Now, if he did give away marital property, he will have to account for its value in the divorce, but you may never get that specific animal back. Fortunately, the shelters have plenty more.

You need to seriously tone down your demands. The world doesn't revolve around you. Your attorney has other clients - and I'd be willing to bet almost anything that many of them are far more critical than your worries about your pet. It is very likely that your attorney is trying to protect people from abuse. And trying to recover children who have been kidnapped. And lots more. If you want 100% of an attorney's time, feel free to pay for one. Sure, that will mean that you have to get a second job, but that's life. You want charity, you live by its terms.

 

[spinkitten]

I dont think I am demanding much, I just want the divorce to be final. I'm really trying to keep certain details out. I have a protection order in place for a reason, the judge granted it because there was evidence of physical and emotional abuse.

I know I will never get my animals back. I also know I probably will not see anything else again. I'm an adult I will get over it. But our young child is having a difficult time with his pets loss and other belongings.

I also accept the fact that x2b has every right to have a lawyer, fine and dandy, but how long should the court give him? a month? 6 months? a year?

What I'm getting from your response is child support is not important, our child's needs is not important. I just want to be done with things, I dont think this is asking to much.

I have come a long way since being separated from this man, I am standing up and breaking the silence.

Just would have been nice for the lawyer to explain what was going on, instead of turning his back to me as if I didnt exist.

 

[ecmst12]

By the way, child support is based on dad's ACTUAL income. He is not going to be required to work 3 jobs to pay what YOU think he should be paying. If he is voluntarily underemployed, that may be different, but if he has no special skills or education and minimum wage is really all he can get, then his support payment is going to be based on minimum wage.

 

[spinkitten]

yes he has skills and before his main job shut down he was making good money.

I also want to state that I'm not asking for a ridiculous amount of money

He took a second job making min wage to support his "hobbies"

The child support he pays for his other kid is pretty high and no matter what he was making he has to pay a certain amount. In fact when support was ordered for his first kid, he was not even employed.

A family member of mine pays support for his 3 kids, he works 2 jobs to make it happen.

 

[mistoffolees]

yes he has skills and before his main job shut down he was making good money.

I also want to state that I'm not asking for a ridiculous amount of money

He took a second job making min wage to support his "hobbies"

The child support he pays for his other kid is pretty high and no matter what he was making he has to pay a certain amount. In fact when support was ordered for his first kid, he was not even employed.

A family member of mine pays support for his 3 kids, he works 2 jobs to make it happen.

If you're going to ignore all the advice you're given, why are you here?

 

[CurrentlyUndone]

yes he has skills and before his main job shut down he was making good money.

I also want to state that I'm not asking for a ridiculous amount of money

He took a second job making min wage to support his "hobbies"

The child support he pays for his other kid is pretty high and no matter what he was making he has to pay a certain amount. In fact when support was ordered for his first kid, he was not even employed.

A family member of mine pays support for his 3 kids, he works 2 jobs to make it happen.

And those other cases are irrelevant to yours. Sorry.

 

[Antigone*]

If you're going to ignore all the advice you're given, why are you here?

Because, she wants some cheese with her whine and we havent' been kind enough to give her a slice.

We are so mean

 

[Ohiogal]

She still has NOT answered whether or not SHE is employed and how many jobs she works.

 

[CurrentlyUndone]

Because, she wants some cheese with her whine and we havent' been kind enough to give her a slice.

We are so mean

I am having some lovely cheese with my pinot grigio. Really lovely.