Divorce

[Nakita]

What is the name of your state (Ohio)?
My husband and I have been married for almost 6 years (I was 17 when we got married). My husband is 26, and we have a 3 year old daughter. Everything we own is in his name (all the cars, the house, the utilities) and I want to have a divorce. No one will tell me eactly how to do this. My husband and I have been getting into REALLY bad fights and it is having a negative effect on the baby. Last sat alone I asked him to leave and he told me no so I said I would go and he told me I counldn't take Riley with me, so I said fine you will go and I packed his clothes and told him to leave. He proceeded to take his keys and go to his car like he was going to leave and he just pulled his car behind mine and told me I wasn't leaving and it was in his name anyways. I blocked the front door with a chair under the knob in hopes he would just leave and he kicked in the front door. The entire door knob broke off and he almost broke the chair (mind you the baby saw ALL of this). I then took the baby into the play room and told him to just leave us alone and he blocked me in there and wouldnt move out of the doorway. Finally he said "I'm going to end this now keep her in here" then he went and took his gun out of the closet like he was going to commit suicide. Now I realize I should've called the cops, but I didnt have my phone (he took it). So eventually he started crying and telling me he couldnt live without me and all this other stuff and that he would go and get help which he has yet to do. But for the safety of my child I think it is best for him to leave seeing how I have no where else to go...I was wondering what are my options or legal rights when it comes to the baby and the house? I just dont think he is mentally stable enough to have her right now.

 

[nextwife]

You had no right to lock him out of the marital home. I would have broken back into my home too, if my spouse tried to do that without a court order giving them sole possession.

Why didn't you just call a cab and leave? Is he home 24/7?

 

[LdiJ]

What is the name of your state (Ohio)?
My husband and I have been married for almost 6 years (I was 17 when we got married). My husband is 26, and we have a 3 year old daughter. Everything we own is in his name (all the cars, the house, the utilities) and I want to have a divorce. No one will tell me eactly how to do this. My husband and I have been getting into REALLY bad fights and it is having a negative effect on the baby. Last sat alone I asked him to leave and he told me no so I said I would go and he told me I counldn't take Riley with me, so I said fine you will go and I packed his clothes and told him to leave. He proceeded to take his keys and go to his car like he was going to leave and he just pulled his car behind mine and told me I wasn't leaving and it was in his name anyways. I blocked the front door with a chair under the knob in hopes he would just leave and he kicked in the front door. The entire door knob broke off and he almost broke the chair (mind you the baby saw ALL of this). I then took the baby into the play room and told him to just leave us alone and he blocked me in there and wouldnt move out of the doorway. Finally he said "I'm going to end this now keep her in here" then he went and took his gun out of the closet like he was going to commit suicide. Now I realize I should've called the cops, but I didnt have my phone (he took it). So eventually he started crying and telling me he couldnt live without me and all this other stuff and that he would go and get help which he has yet to do. But for the safety of my child I think it is best for him to leave seeing how I have no where else to go...I was wondering what are my options or legal rights when it comes to the baby and the house? I just dont think he is mentally stable enough to have her right now.

If you truly have no place to go then contact a domestic violence shelter to help you make a safety plan to get out with some temporary assistance. Also, it doesn't matter that everything is still in his name. Anything purchased during the marriage is marital property and will be divided as marital property.

 

[nextwife]

If you truly have no place to go then contact a domestic violence shelter to help you make a safety plan to get out with some temporary assistance. Also, it doesn't matter that everything is still in his name. Anything purchased during the marriage is marital property and will be divided as marital property.

That's not exactly correxct. Non domingled property bought using non comingled non marital funds is not necesaarily community property, even if acquired during the marriage. Converting one investment format to another, doesn't change it's non marital status if not comingled . We cannot know if all his assets are marital. Likely yes, due to age, but sometimes people have inheritance or gift funds to use.

 

[Ohiogal]

What is the name of your state (Ohio)?
My husband and I have been married for almost 6 years (I was 17 when we got married). My husband is 26, and we have a 3 year old daughter. Everything we own is in his name (all the cars, the house, the utilities) and I want to have a divorce. No one will tell me eactly how to do this.

You need to file a complaint, a property affidavit form, an income affidavit form, a parenting proceeding affidavit form, a health insurance affidavit form, a child support application form, service instructions for certified mail service, temporary orders motion (if you want that), a mutual restraining order form, and a filing fee.

My husband and I have been getting into REALLY bad fights and it is having a negative effect on the baby. Last sat alone I asked him to leave and he told me no so I said I would go and he told me I counldn't take Riley with me, so I said fine you will go and I packed his clothes and told him to leave.

You have NO RIGHT to pack his clothes and tell him to leave. Until a judge orders one of you out of the marital residence you both get to stay. Do you work? Does your husband?

He proceeded to take his keys and go to his car like he was going to leave and he just pulled his car behind mine and told me I wasn't leaving and it was in his name anyways. I blocked the front door with a chair under the knob in hopes he would just leave and he kicked in the front door.

He had EVERY RIGHT to kick in the front door to get into his house. YOU HAD NO RIGHT to prevent him from entering his home.

The entire door knob broke off and he almost broke the chair (mind you the baby saw ALL of this).

Why did YOU subject the baby to this behavior?

I then took the baby into the play room and told him to just leave us alone and he blocked me in there and wouldnt move out of the doorway. Finally he said "I'm going to end this now keep her in here" then he went and took his gun out of the closet like he was going to commit suicide. Now I realize I should've called the cops, but I didnt have my phone (he took it).

So what did YOU do?

So eventually he started crying and telling me he couldnt live without me and all this other stuff and that he would go and get help which he has yet to do. But for the safety of my child I think it is best for him to leave seeing how I have no where else to go...I was wondering what are my options or legal rights when it comes to the baby and the house? I just dont think he is mentally stable enough to have her right now.

YOUR child? That child is also his child. You can go elsewhere. He doesn't have to go ANYWHERE unless a court says he does. You and he both have equal rights to the baby. As for the house, you are entitled to half the equity in the home but you don't have to move out until a court orders you to move. You have no evidence that he is NOT mentally stable.

 

[Ohiogal]

That's not exactly correxct. Non domingled property bought using non comingled non marital funds is not necesaarily community property, even if acquired during the marriage. Converting one investment format to another, doesn't change it's non marital status if not comingled . We cannot know if all his assets are marital. Likely yes, due to age, but sometimes people have inheritance or gift funds to use.

Ohio is NOT a community property state. it is an equitable distribution state.

 

[Nakita]

ok

ok maybe i had no right to lock him out of the house, but he was being crazy and would not stop yelling at me in front of MY child I say mine because ever since she has been born he has never taken an active role in her life. He knows this and I know this. It may be wrong that I say that but honestly he has never even changed a diaper, and he refers to me leaving her with him as babysitting. I did not subject my daughter to anything I could not call a cab because he took my phone from me! I attempted to diffuse the situation by taking her in the other room to get away he followed me in there I was not yelling he was. I am done yelling and I do not want my daughter in that situation. If that makes me a bad person for locking him out then so be it because he has gotten physical with me before and I thought it would be better for him to just leave.

 

[Ohiogal]

ok maybe i had no right to lock him out of the house, but he was being crazy and would not stop yelling at me in front of MY child I say mine because ever since she has been born he has never taken an active role in her life.

Get used to saying "our" child -- his and yours.

He knows this and I know this. It may be wrong that I say that but honestly he has never even changed a diaper, and he refers to me leaving her with him as babysitting.

So he does NOTHING for her and yet you leave the infant with him?

I did not subject my daughter to anything I could not call a cab because he took my phone from me! I attempted to diffuse the situation by taking her in the other room to get away he followed me in there I was not yelling he was. I am done yelling and I do not want my daughter in that situation. If that makes me a bad person for locking him out then so be it because he has gotten physical with me before and I thought it would be better for him to just leave.

Then you should have left or called the police if he got physical with you. You chose not to do so. You chose, instead, to make poor choices.

Again, are you working? Do you have a job?

 

[Nakita]

hm

Yes we both have jobs. Mine is a private home health care and his is at a factory but I make more money then he does. I do not leave her with him if I dont have to but I am going to school and I work so it makes it more difficult. I cant bring her to work with me everyday but usually he only watches her on wed from 7-9pm and maybe thursdays 8:30am-4:30pm.

 

[Ohiogal]

Yes we both have jobs. Mine is a private home health care and his is at a factory but I make more money then he does. I do not leave her with him if I dont have to but I am going to school and I work so it makes it more difficult. I cant bring her to work with me everyday but usually he only watches her on wed from 7-9pm and maybe thursdays 8:30am-4:30pm.

So on Thursdays your child's diaper doesn't get changed between the hours of 830 and 430?

 

[Nakita]

no

No. My child is 3 and is no longer using diapers and hasnt for over a year now. he would change her but would wait until her diaper was so full to do it unless she defecated then he would change her more frequently. He laid in bed and let her have the run of the house while I was gone. She is at the age now that she knows what she can and cant get into so its not as big of a deal but still he should be up and playing with her.

 

[mistoffolees]

No. My child is 3 and is no longer using diapers and hasnt for over a year now. he would change her but would wait until her diaper was so full to do it unless she defecated then he would change her more frequently. He laid in bed and let her have the run of the house while I was gone. She is at the age now that she knows what she can and cant get into so its not as big of a deal but still he should be up and playing with her.

So you don't have any legitimate complaints about his care.

Expecting a parent to spend every minute playing with a child is unrealistic - AND unhealthy for the child.

 

[Zigner]

A textbook example of parenting differences.