Lost and overwhelmed

[ecmst12]

FREAK starts with F and is a perfectly acceptable word, but go ahead and report me if you think that's what you need to do

Honestly, I think some of you people just look for reasons to attack posters even when they DON'T deserve it.

 

[bookwurm25]

Thank you Carlos. I know the JAG office here is open on Thursdays for walk-ins, and I have already discussed child care for that day. You can bet that's where I will be this Thursday.

 

[Carlos Ray]

Thank you Carlos. I know the JAG office here is open on Thursdays for walk-ins, and I have already discussed child care for that day. You can bet that's where I will be this Thursday.

Good for you, good luck and God bless you. I have been in a somewhat similar situation several years ago and for whatever reasons, I will never know, i did not do what I advised you to do. Strangely 4 years later as a unit commander I was advising soldiers to do that very thing. I wish you the very best.

 

[Just Blue]

FREAK starts with F and is a perfectly acceptable word, but go ahead and report me if you think that's what you need to do

Honestly, I think some of you people just look for reasons to attack posters even when they DON'T deserve it.

As You can see I did not report you. And no one "freaking" attacked the poster. If you "think" that perhaps you should seek some ...help. Good luck to you.

 

[stealth2]

Acronyms are still considered when Admin scans these threads. Just saying.
"WTF" is a TOS violation.

So report it. And expect that the next time you put even the tip of a toe over the line, I'll do the same to you.

When did this board turn into a snipe-fest instead of one where we actually try to help people? Sheesh.

 

[stealth2]

Thank you Carlos. I know the JAG office here is open on Thursdays for walk-ins, and I have already discussed child care for that day. You can bet that's where I will be this Thursday.

Go armed with a list of questions. Good luck, and I hope you will come back and let us know what you were advised. Some of us really would like to help you.

 

[Just Blue]

So report it. And expect that the next time you put even the tip of a toe over the line, I'll do the same to you.

.

Are you kidding? If I post a "WTF" ...You or one of the others would report me. I did not report...I advised.

Just saying....

I will also be sure to not "tip my toe" in the "f-bomb waters" as to avoid the stealth-en-a-dor. "shudder".

 

[latigo]

Zigner, then enlighten me: Option A) Leave without the kids and it's abandonment OR Option B) Leave with the kids, and now I am a bad parent for not letting him take care of them? This is where I get confused. If I leave with the kids and go out of state where the employment opportunities are better and I have a family support system, he will come after with "kidnapping" since he has made it perfectly clear there is no way he will ever agree to any custody that takes the kids from him; if I leave without the kids then I am abandoning them because it's "convenient" for me; if I stay with him and "co-parent" it WILL escalate into a physical fight, like it has before. So you tell me, what am I supposed to do?

Apparently your intentions are to move from Louisiana.

SO, BEAR IN MIND that the only way you will ever obtain court awarded physical custody is if you commence the appropriate proceedings in the state where they reside.

In other words, right now only a court in Louisiana has the necessary personal jurisdiction (over the children) enabling any custody placement.

Also, if you do move out-of-state in an act of forsaking the marriage, the father will undoubtedly file for the divorce and obtain custody. In which case your chances of ever having that custody order modified are virtually nil. Why?

Because you would be required not only to journey to the state where they are living, but to hire an attorney and file a motion for modification. And your burden of having that custody order modified would be an obstacle that you could not overcome.

Not unless you were able to convince the court that a material and permanent change of circumstances had occurred since the order was entered warranting that custody be awarded to you and that it would in the best interest of the children to do so.

You ask what to do? I’ll tell you.

Unless you wish to literally give up any chance of having those children with you, then stay put!

Seek the advice of an attorney with the goal of instituting a divorce action and obtaining temporary orders granting you the exclusive use of the residence, custody of your children and temporary spousal and child support. Plus an order that your husband assist you in the payment of your legal expenses.

If you cannot afford the services of an attorney then start making some inquires about obtaining free legal service. For example some chapters of the YWCA have attorneys that volunteer their time. Also contact the appropriate offices at your husband’s military post, because as an dependent you are entitled to free legal advice.

Also, seek pro bono (free legal) services through the Louisiana State Bar Association by starting here: www.lawhelp.org/LA.

And I will repeat, if you pack up and leave the state without your children and establish a permanent domicile outside of Louisiana, you can virtually kiss away of any chance of ever being granted their physical custody.

It is up to you to set your priorities. But my guess is that you are going to walk away.

 

[stealth2]

Are you kidding? If I post a "WTF" ...You or one of the others would report me. I did not report...I advised.

Just saying....

I will also be sure to not "tip my toe" in the "f-bomb waters" as to avoid the stealth-en-a-dor. "shudder".

Actually - I wouldn't have. Becauser I don't normally pay that much attention to your idiocy. But I will now. ecmat didn't deserve your battitude.

 

[Just Blue]

Actually - I wouldn't have. Becauser I don't normally pay that much attention to your idiocy. But I will now. ecmat didn't deserve your battitude.

"Battitude"? Is that what I did? REALLY??
Perhaps the weekend drinks at the FABG should contain Prozac.

OP is the primary caregiver, it's best for the children to stay with her.

In a shelter? Really? Mom stated she was all good with Dad having custody...until she might not pick it back up.

 

[Proserpina]

I'll make some tea, and hot buttered crumpets.

Specially for Latigo, whose response was not just on point, but extremely helpful.

(Not the only post, but that one stuck out)

 

[stealth2]

Eh... one of a few typos. Whatevs.

Ditto Pro on latigo's post.

 

[Eekamouse]

So what happens when daddy ends his military service and moves to California for school? What then? He won't be able to pack up the kids and take them along without her agreeing to it. Is OP just going to be stuck living in LA or won't the court allow either of them to move with the kids?

 

[stealth2]

So what happens when daddy ends his military service and moves to California for school? What then? He won't be able to pack up the kids and take them along without her agreeing to it. Is OP just going to be stuck living in LA or won't the court allow either of them to move with the kids?

No one said she would not ever be able to move. But either the two of them have to agree to the kids being moved to a different state, or a court has to give the okay. If OP has custody and Dad moves to CA, it is entirely likely that the court would allow Mom to move the kids to her home state.

 

[Bali Hai]

How do you report a violation? I'm getting tired of being abused when I try to help someone.