If you had read the entire thread, you will see that I have done MORE to facilitate this relationship than even his dad has.
I did read the entire thread. Several times.
I asked my original question to make sure that I was doing right by the court, because I am already doing right by my son.
That's a matter of opinion. Allowing visitation with his father to be an option is not doing right by your son. In my opinion.
Whether or not you or anyone else here thinks I am doing right by my son is irrelevant to me as a mother. I wanted facts as to what a judge might think. I got several points of view here. All of which I respect and have taken into consideration, helping me to decide to reach out to his father in yet ANOTHER way to not only facilitate visitation but to better the relationship my son and my ex have.
I do not believe you are doing any of that to facilitate the relationship. I believe you are doing it to CYA.
Which is over and BEYOND what I am legally bound to do.
Very telling.
I am bound to make my child available to his father. I am NOT legally bound to take care of the inner dynamics of THEIR personal relationship. That is his father's responsibility. YET, I have played mediator, I have built a relationship with his new wife, I have had private conversations with my ex, I have reached out to my ex's parents and sister in-law...ALL to better the communication between my son and my ex WHOM I DESPISE.
Also very telling.
I agonize over the fact that my kids need their dad but he wont reach out to them even though he lives merely streets away...SO DO NOT TELL ME THAT I HAVE DONE NOTHING.
I never said you've done nothing. To facilitate means to make easier or to help make happen. You've actually hindered visitation by, again, allowing your child to choose. I'm sure your ex appreciates you talking to all his relatives about the problem; however, the problem is between your ex and your son. What have you done, besides telling your son to improve his relationship with his father? Have you ever considered that your son would benefit from counseling to get over the rift? Even if his father won't help himself in this regard, the loss of that relationship will affect your son for his entire life. Don't you care about that?
I got the opinions I needed. I am putting my son first. I am abiding by the wording of the court order. My ex has not even talked about contempt. This is merely for MY information so that I can sleep at night, and let me tell you, I sleep damn good.
Apparently you weren't sleeping so well if you posted here. Dulces sueños.
ETA: One final bit of advice, which I've lifted from OhioGal's signature, "Love your kids more than you hate your ex" and think about what that
really means.
