I too am very suspect of the depth of the "conversation with a lawyer" this wife has had. If this person has been married 50 years, assuming she wasn't a child bride, she's probably in her 70's at least. And the South is just full of women AND men in this age group who've put up with a lot from spouses because they didn't want to divorce, no matter what. I won't really go into whether or not she's cheated on him, has given up sex, etc. because we don't have that sort of information. But some people sort of have the idea that divorce is wrong, and they're never going to do it no matter what. But she was also probably of the idea that if she did divorce him for cheating, she could throw the book at him, so to speak. When they explained division of marital property to her, it didn't sound good at all. It's not what she'd like. I'm sure what she'd really like is for him to quit cheating and come home and behave. I bet if the husband would stop cheating and come home and seek marital counseling with her and work this out, that'd be fine with her.
But that's not going to happen. He's told her he won't do it. She will just have to deal with an attorney and discuss what a fair and equitable division of their property and marital assets would be, else just stand the situation as it is and hope she outlives him. There are a lot of people out there doing that.