What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? CA
Background - My wife of 22 years has announced to our 3 minor children, our friends and our family that she is filing for divorce. She has yet to file, but has made it clear that will happen soon.
Being the sole source provider for the family, and not making a lot of money has been tough. I never realized just how tough, until I changed my direct deposit from our joint account to an account that only I can access. She already had an account that she could only access. She claims that it was to pay the bills with. I started paying the bills and realized that most are past due. Not because of nonpayment, we just seemed to always be late. I get paid every two weeks. When I questioned the bills she stated that they have always been like that and it takes some juggling to get them done. I have always just "handed over" my pay check and let her deal with the bills, i know my fault for not being more involved with the family finances.
Now that I have taken over the finances I have really tightened our budget. No more eating out and no more frivolous spending. As of this writing I only have 7 dollars in my account and don't have milk in the frig. Frustrating for me as I had vowed to take care of my family and always have done so. Now all money is going into a checking account that only I have access. I pay the bills, buy the groceries, and put gas in both of our vehicles, leaving us with little spending money, less that 40 a pay period and sometimes not even that. I have set priorities on these general expenses. Bills 60%, groceries 30%, gas 10%. This past pay day was extremely tight, hence only having 7 dollars left. I am also starting to budget for other expenses, ie school supplies (I know early but I have 3 school age children) and school clothes. I also get military disability but that too is very little and goes to pay bills.
My wife is completely upset that I have done this, and claims that it is illegal to withhold money from her. I'm not sure as all the bills are being paid, groceries are being bought, and I put gas in her car.
Now some questions:
Is what I'm doing illegal?
Does she have access to my disability once divorce is granted?
Background - My wife of 22 years has announced to our 3 minor children, our friends and our family that she is filing for divorce. She has yet to file, but has made it clear that will happen soon.
Being the sole source provider for the family, and not making a lot of money has been tough. I never realized just how tough, until I changed my direct deposit from our joint account to an account that only I can access. She already had an account that she could only access. She claims that it was to pay the bills with. I started paying the bills and realized that most are past due. Not because of nonpayment, we just seemed to always be late. I get paid every two weeks. When I questioned the bills she stated that they have always been like that and it takes some juggling to get them done. I have always just "handed over" my pay check and let her deal with the bills, i know my fault for not being more involved with the family finances.
Now that I have taken over the finances I have really tightened our budget. No more eating out and no more frivolous spending. As of this writing I only have 7 dollars in my account and don't have milk in the frig. Frustrating for me as I had vowed to take care of my family and always have done so. Now all money is going into a checking account that only I have access. I pay the bills, buy the groceries, and put gas in both of our vehicles, leaving us with little spending money, less that 40 a pay period and sometimes not even that. I have set priorities on these general expenses. Bills 60%, groceries 30%, gas 10%. This past pay day was extremely tight, hence only having 7 dollars left. I am also starting to budget for other expenses, ie school supplies (I know early but I have 3 school age children) and school clothes. I also get military disability but that too is very little and goes to pay bills.
My wife is completely upset that I have done this, and claims that it is illegal to withhold money from her. I'm not sure as all the bills are being paid, groceries are being bought, and I put gas in her car.
Now some questions:
Is what I'm doing illegal?
Does she have access to my disability once divorce is granted?
