Alimony with adultery involved?

[G8tor4life]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? FL

How much does adultery matter when it comes to alimony? Currently going through the process of dissolution of marriage. My wife committed adultery twice during our marriage with two different men and had one child with each of those men. One of those was taken from her by child protective services.

 

[justalayman]

Google 101



http://www.leg.state.fl.us/statutes/index.cfm?App_mode=Display_Statute&Search_String=&URL=0000-0099/0061/Sections/0061.08.html


also be aware there is currently action to reconsider the lifetime alimony issue. I have not followed it but they were working on stopping it.


btw: the fact that this happened twice dilutes your argument. If you didn't object to it the first time and seek a remedy, it may be seen that it was not that much of a concern to you.

 

[ecmst12]

Don't forget you need to disestablish paternity for those children if you haven't already.

 

[Bali Hai]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? FL

How much does adultery matter when it comes to alimony? Currently going through the process of dissolution of marriage. My wife committed adultery twice during our marriage with two different men and had one child with each of those men. One of those was taken from her by child protective services.

Sorry, I'd love to help you, but, it appears that others don't want you to hear what I have to say.

 

[Bali Hai]

Google 101



http://www.leg.state.fl.us/statutes/index.cfm?App_mode=Display_Statute&Search_String=&URL=0000-0099/0061/Sections/0061.08.html


also be aware there is currently action to reconsider the lifetime alimony issue. I have not followed it but they were working on stopping it.


btw: the fact that this happened twice dilutes your argument. If you didn't object to it the first time and seek a remedy, it may be seen that it was not that much of a concern to you.

The bill was vetoed by the FL Governor a few weeks ago after overwhelmingly passing the house and senate.

http://www.foxnews.com/politics/2013/05/02/florida-gov-scott-vetoes-bill-that-would-end-permanent-alimony-in-state/

 

[sandyclaus]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? FL

How much does adultery matter when it comes to alimony? Currently going through the process of dissolution of marriage. My wife committed adultery twice during our marriage with two different men and had one child with each of those men. One of those was taken from her by child protective services.

Florida is a "no fault" divorce state. This means that either party may seek a divorce without proving any reason for it other than the spouses don't want to be married anymore. The spouse seeking a divorce simply needs to state that the marriage is "irretrievably broken." This rule relieves the court of the complicated duty of deciding who is at fault, and the parties to the marriage are spared having to talk about painful personal issues in court.

Florida laws specifically list adultery as a factor to be considered in determining the amount of alimony awarded, but courts have struggled to reconcile the consideration of adultery with the "no fault" concept. The bottom line is that judges will only increase a wronged spouse's alimony if the adulterous conduct somehow increases that spouse's monetary needs.

In all honesty, since the children are going to remain with you, then the only factor here to consider is how your spouse's adultery affects YOUR income and assets. It appears the court will seek to equalize and accommodate YOU as the wronged spouse, but if your income and assets aren't really affected by her adultery, then it would be HER that would be on the losing end of that equation. It could actually prevent her from receiving a significant amount of alimony as a result of her actions.

 

[Bali Hai]

Florida is a "no fault" divorce state. This means that either party may seek a divorce without proving any reason for it other than the spouses don't want to be married anymore. The spouse seeking a divorce simply needs to state that the marriage is "irretrievably broken." This rule relieves the court of the complicated duty of deciding who is at fault, and the parties to the marriage are spared having to talk about painful personal issues in court.

Florida laws specifically list adultery as a factor to be considered in determining the amount of alimony awarded, but courts have struggled to reconcile the consideration of adultery with the "no fault" concept. The bottom line is that judges will only increase a wronged spouse's alimony if the adulterous conduct somehow increases that spouse's monetary needs.
In all honesty, since the children are going to remain with you, then the only factor here to consider is how your spouse's adultery affects YOUR income and assets. It appears the court will seek to equalize and accommodate YOU as the wronged spouse, but if your income and assets aren't really affected by her adultery, then it would be HER that would be on the losing end of that equation. It could actually prevent her from receiving a significant amount of alimony as a result of her actions.

The above bolded is confusing.

 

[sandyclaus]

Florida is a "no fault" divorce state. This means that either party may seek a divorce without proving any reason for it other than the spouses don't want to be married anymore. The spouse seeking a divorce simply needs to state that the marriage is "irretrievably broken." This rule relieves the court of the complicated duty of deciding who is at fault, and the parties to the marriage are spared having to talk about painful personal issues in court.

Florida laws specifically list adultery as a factor to be considered in determining the amount of alimony awarded, but courts have struggled to reconcile the consideration of adultery with the "no fault" concept. The bottom line is that judges will only increase a wronged spouse's alimony if the adulterous conduct somehow increases that spouse's monetary needs.

In all honesty, since the children are going to remain with you, then the only factor here to consider is how your spouse's adultery affects YOUR income and assets. It appears the court will seek to equalize and accommodate YOU as the wronged spouse, but if your income and assets aren't really affected by her adultery, then it would be HER that would be on the losing end of that equation. It could actually prevent her from receiving a significant amount of alimony as a result of her actions.

The above bolded is confusing.

How is it confusing?

Let's say a husband cheated on his wife. Let's also assume that the husband was the primary breadwinner in the family. If his infidelity takes away money that would have been available as marital assets, the courts appear to be able to order an extra portion to the injured spouse to make up for those assets the husband misused on his adulterous affair. Since the injured spouse in our situation here would be the primary breadwinner himself, the courts appear to be able to order a LESSER amount of alimony to the spouse (if any is awarded at all) due to her own infidelity if and only if her adultery affected his monetary needs. That's how I would interpret the above bolded portion.

I would be interested in seeing how others interpret this.

 

[I'mTheFather]

Perhaps if you linked the site you cut-and-pasted from, it would help those of us trying to interpret the words of a third person.

 

[I'mTheFather]

If she truly abandoned the family 3 years ago and hasn't responded to the court, why do you think she would be awarded any alimony at all?

 

[Bali Hai]

If she truly abandoned the family 3 years ago and hasn't responded to the court, why do you think she would be awarded any alimony at all?

Because that's what FL judges are prone to do. That's the reason for legislated bills that are subsequently vetoed by the Governor.

 

[justalayman]

The bill was vetoed by the FL Governor a few weeks ago after overwhelmingly passing the house and senate.

http://www.foxnews.com/politics/2013/05/02/florida-gov-scott-vetoes-bill-that-would-end-permanent-alimony-in-state/

sorry to hear that. When I first heard of the possibility, I was amazed it was factual. Heck, that is worse than having a kid. At least they age out of having to support them. Why should a spouse be able to depend on a lifetime income from a former spouse?

 

[ecmst12]

In all honesty, since the children are going to remain with you, then the only factor here to consider is how your spouse's adultery affects YOUR income and assets.

According to the post, OP does not have any children. Wife had children fathered by other men, which hopefully have been disestablished as his or will be during the divorce, but they certainly wouldn't be "remaining with him" since they're not with him in the first place and aren't his.

 

[JennK2009]

Why should a spouse be able to depend on a lifetime income from a former spouse?

It seems to be an antiquated practice, when women would take care of the household and only the husbands went to work. What did they (ex-wife) do after the last of the kids leave the nest and hubby likes his newer version? And, you know the newer version, may just only like them for the money that the family, in its' entirety, has earned.

I always like Bali's perspective. He's funny and he does have a point.

 

[tuffbrk]

Adultery does not make a difference. The courts aren't interested in your story in no-fault states. If you're filing for an at fault divorce, it may result in a smaller award if she has recently begun an adulterous affair and you have documented proof (private investigator). Reality? It is very difficult to have alimony denied if there is any disparity in your incomes.

Your legal fee funds are better off spent ensuring you are not made responsible for any children that aren't yours. However, I will add that if they believe you are dad, call you dad and you have bonded with them and have a parent/child relationship you may want to consider leaving that intact. It's not a decision to be made lightly. It will have repercussions for the child and you may have regrets.

Just an fyi-children are NOT a requirement for alimony and the lack thereof also does not take alimony off of the table. Alimony is paid in childless marriages, it is paid by victims of abuse to their abusers, it is paid by SSDI recipients, it is paid to spouses who are divorcing due to having acknowledged a preference for the same sex, it is paid even if the income disparity is a mere $10, 000.

Keep those facts in mind when it comes time to negotiate and stick with rehabilitive (needs to update professional license) or limited duration. Good luck.