Son's mom wants to terminate her rights

[masopa]

I received a notice in the mail yesterday that a hearing has been scheduled for next week: an "in custody contempt commitment hearing." One page said I didn't need to attend, the next page said I do, since "a decision could be made which affects your interests in this matter" (of course, I will be going).

I assume that this is going to just be about child support, and why she isn't paying the purge amount to get herself out of jail. However, it says that a decision could be made which affects my interests - are they going to reduce child support, reduce the arrears? Is that possible? Would they do that just because she says she can't pay?

Is this something I should have my attorney attend with me? Is there a chance she can bring up her desire for a TPR at this hearing and have that matter heard?

For what its worth, I've told her that I am not in agreement with a TPR.

 

[ecmst12]

Always go to hearings.

 

[single317dad]

I received a notice in the mail yesterday that a hearing has been scheduled for next week: an "in custody contempt commitment hearing." One page said I didn't need to attend, the next page said I do, since "a decision could be made which affects your interests in this matter" (of course, I will be going).

I assume that this is going to just be about child support, and why she isn't paying the purge amount to get herself out of jail. However, it says that a decision could be made which affects my interests - are they going to reduce child support, reduce the arrears? Is that possible? Would they do that just because she says she can't pay?

More likely would be a decision to reduce the purge amount, usually that will be done after a person sits in jail for a while and shows no signs of being able to pay the purge. Otherwise the person could effictively receive a life sentence for failure to pay support, and that's not legal nor is it the intent.

Is there a chance she can bring up her desire for a TPR at this hearing and have that matter heard?

As a rule, most courts will only hear the matter before it, and will ignore someone trying to bring a new petition during a different hearing. It would be within the judge's discretion to hear what she has to say, but I can't imagine anything at all would happen unless the matter was properly introduced.

 

[LeeGalBarB]

I've actually gone through this. I was a mother who relinquished my rights and stepmom adopted my daughter. Granted, it was 10 years ago but, here's what happened. We split the $2,000 that the attorney cost; you can't do this on your own. I put in the petition that he would write off all back child support and I would be released from any future child support. I owed nearly $10,000 and it all went away. Stepmom adopted her (although she didn't want to) and then they had to pay about another $800 to change documents, birth certificates, etc.
It sounds like she's done a little research already. She knows she can use back leverage thinking that you and your wife want to be your son's REAL legal parental unit and is probably thinking you will let her out of her arrearages so you can just move on with your life.
Your options are to 'let her off the hook' and move on with your life, or prepare yourself from the fact that she'll probably stop doing her visitation, you'll never get a dime and all you'll have to link yourself and your son to her is her debt. Not going to keep you very warm at night. Really, it's your decision, you are in position of control and can do whatever you choose.

 

[Zigner]

I've actually gone through this. I was a mother who relinquished my rights and stepmom adopted my daughter. Granted, it was 10 years ago but, here's what happened. We split the $2,000 that the attorney cost; you can't do this on your own. I put in the petition that he would write off all back child support and I would be released from any future child support. I owed nearly $10,000 and it all went away. Stepmom adopted her (although she didn't want to) and then they had to pay about another $800 to change documents, birth certificates, etc.
It sounds like she's done a little research already. She knows she can use back leverage thinking that you and your wife want to be your son's REAL legal parental unit and is probably thinking you will let her out of her arrearages so you can just move on with your life.
Your options are to 'let her off the hook' and move on with your life, or prepare yourself from the fact that she'll probably stop doing her visitation, you'll never get a dime and all you'll have to link yourself and your son to her is her debt. Not going to keep you very warm at night. Really, it's your decision, you are in position of control and can do whatever you choose.

So, the price you sold your child for was a little less than $10,000?

 

[Silverplum]

So, the price you sold your child for was a little less than $10,000?

Holy Moses.

 

[TinkerBelleLuvr]

There are people in this world who have no business being parents. We don't know the circumstances for a person willing to TPR. There is only one judge and we are not it.

 

[ecmst12]

But, in many states it is illegal to sign over rights in exchange for forgiving back CS.