Is this sexual harassment?

[oshmunnies]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? South Dakota

My girlfriend's boss has repeatedly made "jokes" to her, not about her or himself, but essentially implying that I cheat on her when I travel for my job because "all guys do it."

From what I've read about sexual harassment, it typically only mentions jokes/comments/questions referring to the first or second party, but not a third party.

Wondering if this sort of "joke" is legally sexual harassment, it sure seems like it to me.

Thanks for any input.

P.S. Not that it has any legal relevance, but these jokes lead to some temporary trust issues between her and me (now resolved). I love her deeply, and would never do such a despicable thing, making me all the more angry about it.

 

[quincy]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? South Dakota

My girlfriend's boss has repeatedly made "jokes" to her, not about her or himself, but essentially implying that I cheat on her when I travel for my job because "all guys do it."

From what I've read about sexual harassment, it typically only mentions jokes/comments/questions referring to the first or second party, but not a third party.

Wondering if this sort of "joke" is legally sexual harassment, it sure seems like it to me.

Thanks for any input.

P.S. Not that it has any legal relevance, but these jokes lead to some temporary trust issues between her and me (now resolved). I love her deeply, and would never do such a despicable thing, making me all the more angry about it.

Did she tell her boss that his comments make her uncomfortable and did she ask him to stop with the "jokes?"

 

[oshmunnies]

Did she tell her boss that his comments make her uncomfortable and did she ask him to stop with the "jokes?"

Not explicitly. She does what I think many people do in similar situations (not wanting to create conflict with a superior), she diffuses it by acting partly amused, but more annoyed, then just ignores it. I've told her to ask him to stop, but she keeps acting like it's not worth it.

 

[Proserpina]

Not explicitly. She does what I think many people do in similar situations (not wanting to create conflict with a superior), she diffuses it by acting partly amused, but more annoyed, then just ignores it. I've told her to ask him to stop, but she keeps acting like it's not worth it.

Then realistically she has nothing. She needs to report this.

 

[commentator]

If she were to report this to higher ups, the guy would say, "I had no idea it was offensive, she never gave me any indication!" And he'd be off the hook. She'd look like a tattletale, very unprofessional. She's silly to believe him, or to pay too much attention to him in the first place, and if she wanted to stop the conversation, she could. You don't even know whether or not the conversations actually took place, do you? You're definitely barking up the wrong tree here. if she's coming home and having trust issues with you because of something some man on her job supposedly says to her about how "all guys do it," she's really worried herself, and she's just using what he supposedly said as an excuse to jump you and sound you out about it. You instructing her to go in and tell this man she works with not to say things like this to her anymore is creepy and controlling.

 

[cbg]

However, from an HR perspective what the boss is saying to her is, if not traditionally SH, inappropriate at best.

The OP's girlfriend absolutely needs to either tell him to stop, or report it to HR.

 

[Eekamouse]

The girlfriend is obviously pouring her concerns and worry into her boss' ear about her boyfriend's out of town business trips and he's simply voicing the accusations she can't quite bring herself to say herself. You two have trust issues that are not the fault of her boss.

 

[eerelations]

The girlfriend is obviously pouring her concerns and worry into her boss' ear about her boyfriend's out of town business trips and he's simply voicing the accusations she can't quite bring herself to say herself. You two have trust issues that are not the fault of her boss.

Where in any of the OP's posts did you find all this?