Stay Away OOP/ School Property

[Bingbing22]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? NY

There is an OOP issued in criminal court against my ex with both myself and my daughter being protected parties. It states that he cannot go to my daughters school. Does that apply to school property outside of the school day (i.e. community festival held on school grounds). If he did attend but did not approach me or my daughter but was seen there and posted photos on social media of him being there is that enough for a violation. He has repeatedly violated the order and just recently got out of jail after serving 7 months for a violation while we waited for trial. I am not trying to be a jerk, just wondering because I had assumed it meant at any time, I would just have to be more careful moving forward if it does not.

 

[LdiJ]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? NY

There is an OOP issued in criminal court against my ex with both myself and my daughter being protected parties. It states that he cannot go to my daughters school. Does that apply to school property outside of the school day (i.e. community festival held on school grounds). If he did attend but did not approach me or my daughter but was seen there and posted photos on social media of him being there is that enough for a violation. He has repeatedly violated the order and just recently got out of jail after serving 7 months for a violation while we waited for trial. I am not trying to be a jerk, just wondering because I had assumed it meant at any time, I would just have to be more careful moving forward if it does not.

If he went there knowing that you and your daughter were likely to be there then its a violation. If he went there for an event that he did not believe that you or your daughter would attend, it would not be a violation.

 

[Ohiogal]

If he went there knowing that you and your daughter were likely to be there then its a violation. If he went there for an event that he did not believe that you or your daughter would attend, it would not be a violation.

WRONG. If the order states he cannot go to the child's school then it doesn't matter what the situation is. If the order prohibits him from the child's school then he can't be there regardless of the circumstances.

 

[LdiJ]

WRONG. If the order states he cannot go to the child's school then it doesn't matter what the situation is. If the order prohibits him from the child's school then he can't be there regardless of the circumstances.

Ok...I will take your word for it. I am surprised however that it would mean that he couldn't attend a public function there if it was unlikely that the OP and child would attend. Our school buildings are often rented out for public or private functions that have nothing to do with the school itself.

For example, what if he were ordered to anger management classes, and sessions were offered at the school one evening a week? Would he have to find another anger management class?

 

[Bingbing22]

thanks to both of you. I had just assumed it meant no matter what he couldn't be there so when I found out he was there I wasn't sure what I should do.

 

[Ohiogal]

Ok...I will take your word for it. I am surprised however that it would mean that he couldn't attend a public function there if it was unlikely that the OP and child would attend. Our school buildings are often rented out for public or private functions that have nothing to do with the school itself.

For example, what if he were ordered to anger management classes, and sessions were offered at the school one evening a week? Would he have to find another anger management class?

Yes it very well could. If the order states specifically that he cannot be at the school and doesn't specify when the child and OP would be there, then he can NEVER be at that school.

 

[BL]

There is an OOP issued in criminal court against my ex with both myself and my daughter being protected parties. It states that he cannot go to my daughters school.

Plain english law doesn't ring a bell??

 

[HighwayMan]

The order should be quite clear. Unless there are exceptions listed then the ex must not visit the child's school. Period.

To do so under any circumstances is a violation of the order and subjects him being arrested for Criminal Contempt. If he already did 7 months in jail for it then one would think he would know better.

 

[Bingbing22]

His Workplace/OOP

NY State

Okay so what happens if there is a community event (Bible camp) that my daughter wants to attend held at the workplace of my ex, who is prohibited by the OOP from being near my daughter or I.

He works at a church, as the facilities manager, which has a community building (the only one where we live) that is rented out or offered to community groups for events.

Can my daughter and I still attend events there, (even the food pantry which we need on occasion is there), what happens if he is there at the same time?

Who has to leave? Could I get in trouble for being there or allowing her to be there?

 

[I'mTheFather]

NY State

Okay so what happens if there is a community event (Bible camp) that my daughter wants to attend held at the workplace of my ex, who is prohibited by the OOP from being near my daughter or I.

He works at a church, as the facilities manager, which has a community building (the only one where we live) that is rented out or offered to community groups for events.

Can my daughter and I still attend events there, (even the food pantry which we need on occasion is there), what happens if he is there at the same time?

Who has to leave? Could I get in trouble for being there or allowing her to be there?

Daughter doesn't go to Bible camp and you go to events only when you know, for sure, that your ex isn't working at the time.

You seriously cannot think that he would have to leave his job to accommodate your visit, do you?

 

[BL]

NY State

Okay so what happens if there is a community event (Bible camp) that my daughter wants to attend held at the workplace of my ex, who is prohibited by the OOP from being near my daughter or I.

He works at a church, as the facilities manager, which has a community building (the only one where we live) that is rented out or offered to community groups for events.

Can my daughter and I still attend events there, (even the food pantry which we need on occasion is there), what happens if he is there at the same time?

Who has to leave? Could I get in trouble for being there or allowing her to be there?

Xdon't have to leave , and since you know about the OOP , then don't go or take the child .

You a troll?

 

[Bingbing22]

No BL, I am not a troll, I am a mother who was almost killed 7 years ago, who has a daughter whose connection to the Bible Camp predates his employment there. The fact that I am asking should show that I prefer to be informed by those more experienced in law than I am, so I can make an educated decision, rather than make ignorant comments such as yours.

Xdon't have to leave , and since you know about the OOP , then don't go or take the child .

You a troll?

 

[BL]

No BL, I am not a troll, I am a mother who was almost killed 7 years ago, who has a daughter whose connection to the Bible Camp predates his employment there. The fact that I am asking should show that I prefer to be informed by those more experienced in law than I am, so I can make an educated decision, rather than make ignorant comments such as yours.

Then stay away from the place. That's educated LAW . You are creating problems your're self .

you can't have both ways ,and make him leave his work place.

Get a grip and move on.

 

[aardvarc]

Okay so what happens if there is a community event (Bible camp) that my daughter wants to attend held at the workplace of my ex, who is prohibited by the OOP from being near my daughter or I.

On the off chance that this isn't a total troll...


Does your daughter understand the word "no"? She might want to play with a machine gun too. The answer: "no". The reason: "because I said so". YOU are the parent. YOU run the show. You are expected to do what you need to do to keep your child SAFE...NOT cater to the child's whims.

As the parent, the court expects you to not WILLFULLY and KNOWINGLY expose the child to someone that you have already told the court is a danger to you or your child. If you'd like the court to DROP the order, by all means, show up with the child where you KNOW he works. That's all it would take for him to stand in front of the judge and say "well Your Honor, she apparantly has NO fear for herself or the child, because look at these pictures...she shows up where she knows I work, for something that isn't a life and death situation". If your kids wants to attend Bible camp, find her ANOTHER one. It really is THAT simple.

And, to take things a step even further to the extreme...the very fact that you'd be willing to risk (according to you AND the court, it would be dangerous) your child's LIFE just because she wants to attend a community event could even put you on the radar for child services to wonder if you are failing to protect the child appropriately.

Can my daughter and I still attend events there, (even the food pantry which we need on occasion is there),

There's nothing in the order stopping you or the child from doing anything. But every time to step foot on property where you know the father works, you build his case for having the order dropped completely.

what happens if he is there at the same time?

Depends. If you make an issue of it and insist on staying, you effectively leave the court no choice but to DROP the order. It's not like he works at the emergency room and your child needs emergency surgery. Find other resources in your community, or make plans to increase your safety planning for when the order is vacated by the court. You can't have it both ways.

Could I get in trouble for being there or allowing her to be there?

Only in the sense that your presence or your child's presence negates the need for the order. If asking if you or your child would be arrested, no, since neither of you is the subject of the order. If you allow your daughter to be around someone that you have told thecourt is dangerous, you risk the court taking the child away from YOU if you show you are unwilling to play the role of a responsible parent and keeping her away from danger. Again, you can't have it both ways. If dad is as dangerous as you make him out to be, then you do what you need to do to keep your child away, at ALL costs. If participation in church-based activities is so important to you and/or your child, then your only long term option is to get involved in a church that he doesn't work for. Last time I checked, God was everywhere. Go to a different church. Move if you need to. The court isn't going to make dad quit his job and every time you show up there, you are poking a lion with a stick. You are the only one with anything to loose.

 

[Just Blue]

On the off chance that this isn't a total troll...


Does your daughter understand the word "no"? She might want to play with a machine gun too. The answer: "no". The reason: "because I said so". YOU are the parent. YOU run the show. You are expected to do what you need to do to keep your child SAFE...NOT cater to the child's whims.

As the parent, the court expects you to not WILLFULLY and KNOWINGLY expose the child to someone that you have already told the court is a danger to you or your child. If you'd like the court to DROP the order, by all means, show up with the child where you KNOW he works. That's all it would take for him to stand in front of the judge and say "well Your Honor, she apparantly has NO fear for herself or the child, because look at these pictures...she shows up where she knows I work, for something that isn't a life and death situation". If your kids wants to attend Bible camp, find her ANOTHER one. It really is THAT simple.

And, to take things a step even further to the extreme...the very fact that you'd be willing to risk (according to you AND the court, it would be dangerous) your child's LIFE just because she wants to attend a community event could even put you on the radar for child services to wonder if you are failing to protect the child appropriately.




There's nothing in the order stopping you or the child from doing anything. But every time to step foot on property where you know the father works, you build his case for having the order dropped completely.




Depends. If you make an issue of it and insist on staying, you effectively leave the court no choice but to DROP the order. It's not like he works at the emergency room and your child needs emergency surgery. Find other resources in your community, or make plans to increase your safety planning for when the order is vacated by the court. You can't have it both ways.




Only in the sense that your presence or your child's presence negates the need for the order. If asking if you or your child would be arrested, no, since neither of you is the subject of the order. If you allow your daughter to be around someone that you have told thecourt is dangerous, you risk the court taking the child away from YOU if you show you are unwilling to play the role of a responsible parent and keeping her away from danger. Again, you can't have it both ways. If dad is as dangerous as you make him out to be, then you do what you need to do to keep your child away, at ALL costs. If participation in church-based activities is so important to you and/or your child, then your only long term option is to get involved in a church that he doesn't work for. Last time I checked, God was everywhere. Go to a different church. Move if you need to. The court isn't going to make dad quit his job and every time you show up there, you are poking a lion with a stick. You are the only one with anything to loose.

Most wonderfully stated!!!