Disagree with Child Support Order

[Pinkie39]

Not defining floozy. Its my own special word lol. Uppity...yes. Telling me I'm not worthy of her response, that's pretty uppity. I didn't ask for her responses, they are 99 percent irrelevant to the questions I posed to begin with. She's continued to nit pick my posts and try to make me feel like a piece of crap because I'm protecting the best interests of my child and fighting for her consideration FIRST before someone else's children. I didn't come here for her approval. And it seems like your only looking to continue the bickering SP.

LD I appreciate that. I'm sorry for venting but this is a very frustrating situation that becomes emotionally draining and impacts my time and energy that is devoted to my children. Parents should support their children and be attentive to their needs. Its very frustrating that I have to battle with them to give their children the very basic needs they are entitled to. I get blown off because I make good money and my family is very wealthy. Their attitude towards me is that we should pay for everything "just because". And I really think the Judge screwed the pooch on this one, and I need some case law for my appeal. I don't work with a lot of case law I primarily work in estate law. But yes I think consulting my Attorney on how to proceed is a good idea.

There's no way to force someone to be responsible if they don't want to be.

Yes, there's legal recourse when someone won't pay child support, BUT that certainly doesn't mean the OP is going to miraculously start receiving $500+ a month in support for each child, either.

If the OP really has the means to support her children comfortably pretty much on her own, as she claims, then personally I think she'd be better off devoting her time and energy to other things besides an endless court battle.

 

[Ladyback1]

OK...just so you know where I'm coming from:

My Ex started fighting the child support amount 4 mo. after the divorce. He moved 4 hrs away in 2010, and has not seen the children since Dec. 2010. He eventually succeeded in getting his payment amt. lowered (by $250/mo) in 2011. He contributes NOTHING to the mental, emotional or day-to-day needs of my children. He probably wouldn't pay child support except I'm going through the state and they garnish whatever paycheck he gets (including the 2.5 years of unemployment that he's had in the last 5 years).

my advice: You can NOT force someone to be a parent. You just can't. If the "parent" doesn't want to support their child financially, they will find a way to get out of paying.
It's real easy to be bitter. It's real easy to want to lay blame on the offending parent. But, let me tell you--the MINUTE you give up trying to force either of your children's fathers to actual be a parent? You will feel so much better. No one is saying your children are less important or deserve less than any other children. What we are saying is at some point, you have to give up the bitter, angry vitriol about your Exs. Until you learn/accept that sometimes, no matter what you think or do, you are NEVER, EVER, EVER going to be able to change the men you chose to procreate with.

 

[Proserpina]

Posterina or whatever your name is...don't call me pet names and don't get off track. My post about my opinion and her being lazy is not what I plan on bringing into Court. The fact that they misrepresented their income purposely to deny my daughter child support is what I am appealing on, and that the step children's needs are due to the fact that their own parents are obligated to support them and one voluntarily chooses not to. You're taking my words out of context and twisting them around. There is a difference between my opinion and what I will base my appeal on.

I'm going to be the visiting parent cause I call it like I see it? Ok lady. Whatever your smoking, I want some. Do you have any idea the way people act in court rooms when child support and custody issues arise? This is mild. It has nothing to do with despising anyone. More along the lines of being disgusted. Our daughter and her needs should come first. This guy has literally resorted to dodging the mail man and trying to take partial residential responsibility for her in an effort to avoid paying child support (which was obviously DISMISSED). He signed off on his rights to avoid paying child support to begin with! He's a loser with a capital L. Don't tell me to watch my mouth I am an excellent parent and that is why I am standing up for her and making sure that her needs and best interest are put FIRST for once in her life instead of his floozy girlfriends and wives and their children. I will never be the visiting parent because their Father's couldn't be BOTHERED with having them full-time or even part-time since the day they were born. Momma has done all the work while they screw off and play. Until you have walked a mile in my shoes don't pass judgement. I don't need your haughty and uppity answers talking down on me. People are always quick to draw conclusions till the shoe is on the other foot. Are you a single Mother of two children receiving 190 a month in child support? Im willing to bet your NOT.

Oh. Want to walk in my shoes first? We could play swappsies.

When you're widowed very early in life, when you lose a child, when you're dealing with a chronic, life-shortening disease.... come back and talk to me. And if you think that your children aren't picking up on your feelings, you've got another thing coming.

L - If you can give me something...anything...specifically prohibiting the court from using Dad's circumstances (as they pertain to CS, at least) as a reason to deviate , you know me. Show me the goods, and I'll come back and apologize. And I'll do it graciously.

Also, let's not pretend that the kids aren't picking up on Mom's feelings. You know better than that.

(You guys did read the statute...right?)

 

[FamilyGirl]

Where did I ever say I was having a hard time? Put up or shut up. I NEVER said I was having a hard time. I complained about the child support payments that I am receiving from my children's fathers because they are obligated by State law to support their children. I'm not going to release them of their financial obligations at any time, no matter how many raises I get or how much wealth I accumulate. They Fathered the children, signed their birth certificates, they insisted on visitation schedules which I am happy to oblige as long as my children are safe. Point being they need to pay child support payments in accordance with State Guidelines, and the Marital Master gave my daughter's father a downward deviation to which I do not believe he is entitled and a Magistrate signed off on it. His circumstances were not represented correctly. Yes I've read the statute. AGAIN I pose the question...where in NH law does it say that the support of step-children should take priority over biological during a child support calculation? The fact that I'm doing well and have my stuff together is irrelevant. I'm not letting him off the hook because I come from a hard working family. He needs to pay child support in the amount calculated according to their COMPLETE and accurate financial position which is $86 and not $35. I never said I was struggling so stay out of my lane.

I do understand I need to get over the bitterness and I can't force them to be parents but on the same token they are always insisting on visitation, but don't want to pay child support. My son's Father dragged me into Court to get visitations and now he doesn't want them because they were ordered supervised because he is a drug addict and was impaired at the final hearing. Its not ME creating all the madness here. I don't care if they never saw their children again. But if they are going to insist upon it, than pay child support payments according to your income and follow through with the visitation schedule as set forth. This is not an emotionally draining situation that I just magically create for myself. I can't ignore their requests for hearings. They get ordered visitation, I adjust my schedule accordingly, and then they don't show up or don't want it. I file for contempt and get harrased about it and called every name in the book. Either you want a part of your kids life or you don't. Regardless they need to pay CS and I will never stop pursuing them for that again. Every three years or every raise I find out about I will request it be adjusted as well. The fact that I make good $$$ is mostly irrelevant.

 

[FamilyGirl]

But Lady I do understand I need to work on my attitude towards them. I'm working on it. Thanks for your input. I was very negative and bitter about it but now I am choosing to be positive because along with all the work comes all the glory. I now consider myself very lucky to be a single Mother and have the privilege of having my kids 90 percent of the time and enjoying these very precious moments because they don't last forever. Their the losers, not me. But I can't ignore court battles that I get dragged into most of the time either.

 

[Proserpina]

Where did I ever say I was having a hard time? Put up or shut up. I NEVER said I was having a hard time. I complained about the child support payments that I am receiving from my children's fathers because they are obligated by State law to support their children. I'm not going to release them of their financial obligations at any time, no matter how many raises I get or how much wealth I accumulate.
They Fathered the children, signed their birth certificates, they insisted on visitation schedules which I am happy to oblige as long as my children are safe. Point being they need to pay child support payments in accordance with State Guidelines, and the Marital Master gave my daughter's father a downward deviation to which I do not believe he is entitled and a Magistrate signed off on it. His circumstances were not represented correctly. Yes I've read the statute. AGAIN I pose the question...where in NH law does it say that the support of step-children should take priority over biological during a child support calculation? The fact that I'm doing well and have my stuff together is irrelevant. I'm not letting him off the hook because I come from a hard working family. He needs to pay child support in the amount calculated according to their COMPLETE and accurate financial position which is $86 and not $35. I never said I was struggling so stay out of my lane.

Attorney.

I do understand I need to get over the bitterness and I can't force them to be parents but on the same token they are always insisting on visitation, but don't want to pay child support. My son's Father dragged me into Court to get visitations and now he doesn't want them because they were ordered supervised because he is a drug addict and was impaired at the final hearing. Its not ME creating all the madness here. I don't care if they never saw their children again. But if they are going to insist upon it, than pay child support payments according to your income and follow through with the visitation schedule as set forth. This is not an emotionally draining situation that I just magically create for myself. I can't ignore their requests for hearings. They get ordered visitation, I adjust my schedule accordingly, and then they don't show up or don't want it. I file for contempt and get harrased about it and called every name in the book. Either you want a part of your kids life or you don't. Regardless they need to pay CS and I will never stop pursuing them for that again. Every three years or every raise I find out about I will request it be adjusted as well. The fact that I make good $$$ is mostly irrelevant.

I actually completely agree in one aspect - and that should surprise you.

Legally, they're two separate things. But morally? Support your offspring.

Just be aware that any increased income you get can also justify a modification - downwards.

 

[stealth2]

I usually take every opportunity I can to trash talk them, as long as my kids don't hear it.

My only comment to this thread has to do with the above statement. As much care as you may take to not speak poorly about the fathers within earshot of the kids, believe me when I tell you that they are well aware of your feelings, and that is not necessarily a good thing. Not that it's likely to lose you custody or anything, but it could cause one or both of your children serious emotional harm. No matter how terrible they may be, those men make up half of your children's DNA. For no reason apart from that, your children deserve better than the anger and bitterness you give off. Just something for you to ponder on.

 

[Proserpina]

Where did I ever say I was having a hard time? Put up or shut up.

Or else you'll do what, exactly?

I NEVER said I was having a hard time. I complained about the child support payments that I am receiving from my children's fathers because they are obligated by State law to support their children. I'm not going to release them of their financial obligations at any time, no matter how many raises I get or how much wealth I accumulate. They Fathered the children, signed their birth certificates, they insisted on visitation schedules which I am happy to oblige as long as my children are safe. Point being they need to pay child support payments in accordance with State Guidelines, and the Marital Master gave my daughter's father a downward deviation to which I do not believe he is entitled and a Magistrate signed off on it. His circumstances were not represented correctly. Yes I've read the statute. AGAIN I pose the question...where in NH law does it say that the support of step-children should take priority over biological during a child support calculation? The fact that I'm doing well and have my stuff together is irrelevant. I'm not letting him off the hook because I come from a hard working family. He needs to pay child support in the amount calculated according to their COMPLETE and accurate financial position which is $86 and not $35. I never said I was struggling so stay out of my lane.

If you'd actually looked at the information provided you would easily see - because it screams out of the page - that the state guidelines are just that. Guidelines.

And clearly, a deviation is allowed.

Though I'd love to see an order including the words "step-children should take priority".

I do understand I need to get over the bitterness and I can't force them to be parents but on the same token they are always insisting on visitation, but don't want to pay child support. My son's Father dragged me into Court to get visitations and now he doesn't want them because they were ordered supervised because he is a drug addict and was impaired at the final hearing. Its not ME creating all the madness here. I don't care if they never saw their children again. But if they are going to insist upon it, than pay child support payments according to your income and follow through with the visitation schedule as set forth. This is not an emotionally draining situation that I just magically create for myself. I can't ignore their requests for hearings. They get ordered visitation, I adjust my schedule accordingly, and then they don't show up or don't want it. I file for contempt and get harrased about it and called every name in the book. Either you want a part of your kids life or you don't. Regardless they need to pay CS and I will never stop pursuing them for that again. Every three years or every raise I find out about I will request it be adjusted as well. The fact that I make good $$$ is mostly irrelevant.

You keep saying that you've read the statute. Is this the part you don't understand?

IV. Self-support reserve and minimum child support obligation.
(a) If the obligor parent's gross income is less than the self-support reserve and the court has determined that the obligor is not voluntarily unemployed or underemployed, the court shall order the child support obligation in the amount of a minimum support order.
(b) If the obligor parent's gross income is greater than the self-support reserve but payment of the parental support obligation as calculated under this chapter would reduce the obligor parent's adjusted gross income below the self-support reserve, the presumptive child support obligation shall be the difference between the self-support reserve and the obligor parent's adjusted gross income, but in any event shall be no less than the amount of a minimum support order.

Do you need someone to explain what that means?

 

[Just Blue]

Posterina or whatever your name is...don't call me pet names and don't get off track. My post about my opinion and her being lazy is not what I plan on bringing into Court. The fact that they misrepresented their income purposely to deny my daughter child support is what I am appealing on, and that the step children's needs are due to the fact that their own parents are obligated to support them and one voluntarily chooses not to. You're taking my words out of context and twisting them around. There is a difference between my opinion and what I will base my appeal on.

I'm going to be the visiting parent cause I call it like I see it? Ok lady. Whatever your smoking, I want some. Do you have any idea the way people act in court rooms when child support and custody issues arise? This is mild. It has nothing to do with despising anyone. More along the lines of being disgusted. Our daughter and her needs should come first. This guy has literally resorted to dodging the mail man and trying to take partial residential responsibility for her in an effort to avoid paying child support (which was obviously DISMISSED). He signed off on his rights to avoid paying child support to begin with! He's a loser with a capital L. Don't tell me to watch my mouth I am an excellent parent and that is why I am standing up for her and making sure that her needs and best interest are put FIRST for once in her life instead of his floozy girlfriends and wives and their children. I will never be the visiting parent because their Father's couldn't be BOTHERED with having them full-time or even part-time since the day they were born. Momma has done all the work while they screw off and play. Until you have walked a mile in my shoes don't pass judgement. I don't need your haughty and uppity answers talking down on me. People are always quick to draw conclusions till the shoe is on the other foot. Are you a single Mother of two children receiving 190 a month in child support? Im willing to bet your NOT.

Dear...No one on this forum has to give you the time of day. You are a "paralegal" ...find your own case law.

And as the Mother of two children who has had problems with their dad...Your hate that you display toward WILL make itself clear to your children. They are half you and Dad(s) DNA.
With all the issues I have had with my girs father...I never hated him. I love my children too much to hate their Father. If not for him I would not have THEM. I have to Love Him just for that.

Your attitude and postings here are really nasty...makes one wonder why Dad waived his VISITATION rights.

 

[Pinkie39]

NH uses an income shares model for child support. So if the OP earns a lot of money, and a lot more than her ex, that can reduce his support as well.

 

[Proserpina]

NH uses an income shares model for child support. So if the OP earns a lot of money, and a lot more than her ex, that can reduce his support as well.

As should be the case.

 

[justalayman]

I skipped over much but somewhere back a few pages you said the father lied about the family income in his household. Throughout the thread you have asked about reconsideration or appeal.


For an appeal to be accepted there needs to be a basis for the appeal. For the order to be reconsidered there must be a reason.

You seem to be basing either on the family income issue


So, my question to you is;

Why didn't you dispute the income issue when it was presented to the court? Often times if you fail to object to evidence in a timely manner (such as when it is entered as evidence) you lose the right to appeal based on that issue later b

 

[Pinkie39]

I skipped over much but somewhere back a few pages you said the father lied about the family income in his household. Throughout the thread you have asked about reconsideration or appeal.


For an appeal to be accepted there needs to be a basis for the appeal. For the order to be reconsidered there must be a reason.

You seem to be basing either on the family income issue


So, my question to you is;

Why didn't you dispute the income issue when it was presented to the court? Often times if you fail to object to evidence in a timely manner (such as when it is entered as evidence) you lose the right to appeal based on that issue later b

She harped on the ex's girlfriend getting food stamps, Medicaid and assistance paying her electric bills. I can't imagine a court would consider that as income. No more than they will figure in any tax credits a custodial parent receives, when calculating income. I know some custodial parents who get $3000+ dollars a year in income tax refunds because they have children.

If the OP thinks any public assistance coming in to her ex's household should be counted against him as income, would she also be ok with any tax credits she gets as a result of having kids be counted against her in return? I doubt it.

 

[LdiJ]

She harped on the ex's girlfriend getting food stamps, Medicaid and assistance paying her electric bills. I can't imagine a court would consider that as income. No more than they will figure in any tax credits a custodial parent receives, when calculating income. I know some custodial parents who get $3000+ dollars a year in income tax refunds because they have children.

If the OP thinks any public assistance coming in to her ex's household should be counted against him as income, would she also be ok with any tax credits she gets as a result of having kids be counted against her in return? I doubt it.

That wasn't what she was counting as income. Her ex got a deviation because he is allegedly supporting his stepchildren. However, his wife is receiving child support from their father, plus all the state bennies, therefore its questionable if her ex is providing much, if any support at all for the stepchildren. She was stating that the child support for the stepchildren he is allegedly supporting should have been counted in. In normal circumstances, that would not be the case. However, with the claim that he is supporting those stepchildren and the subsequent request for a deviation, any other funds contributing towards their support certainly should have been factored in.

However, I also have some concern about those state bennies...because if the household is receiving those bennies without dad's income factored in (and thats an awful lot of bennies for 35.00 a week to be a deviation from dad's income)...mom's appeal could open a huge can of worms for dad's family.

 

[FamilyGirl]

Dear...No one on this forum has to give you the time of day. You are a "paralegal" ...find your own case law.

And as the Mother of two children who has had problems with their dad...Your hate that you display toward WILL make itself clear to your children. They are half you and Dad(s) DNA.
With all the issues I have had with my girs father...I never hated him. I love my children too much to hate their Father. If not for him I would not have THEM. I have to Love Him just for that.

Your attitude and postings here are really nasty...makes one wonder why Dad waived his VISITATION rights.

I am a Paralegal, but again Paralegal's don't know everything. We specialize in one area of law. I understand no one has to give me the time of day, but I thought I would ask. I see many of you just want to continue picking me apart, and hey that's fine with me. Suit yourself. I have way better things to do than try and defend myself from internet trolls.

Dad waived his visitation rights because he didn't want to pay child support and was too irresponsible to be a parent, and wanted to continue to play. If anybody sold their child for money it was him, and the people important in my life and whose opinion's matter know that is the truth. He was what we call "selfish". Don't enable his choices by saying it's my fault he waived his rights. There is really no good excuse to not be a part of your child's life. If you can create them, than you should step up and take care of them.

I asked for Pinky to back up his or her statements that I was saying I was broke and needed their child support, or complaining that I didn't have enough to get by. Because she/he accused me of whining in one statement and than saying I was well off in another. You can continue to try and poke holes in my story all you want. What your saying exists, doesn't. I NEVER said I couldn't take care of my offspring. My kids have everything and more, and I consider myself very blessed. That doesn't mean I'm going to let their Father's off their financial obligations.

Posterina. I have read the statute, many times. For the 10th time, I don't question the STATUTE. It says right here that he is "entitled to a downward deviation because he is caring for three young (step-children)". I want to know where it says that step children's needs are considered in a child support order over that of the biological child in the State of NH. Their needs ARE being made a priority over our daughters needs because when I run the numbers through a CS calculator the minimum payment is $86.18 for him and he is only ordered to pay $35.00. The step-children are therefore entitled to a larger portion of his income than is his own child. Don't insinuate I'm a ______ because my kids have "various" Father's. They have TWO. Welcome to 2014.