Uncontested Divorce Form Issue

[DBDIY]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? NY

I’m filing for an uncontested divorce in NY using their online DIY tool to help set up all the forms properly. One issue I’m having is how to enter my spouses name on the form. When we got married she checked the box to take on my last name, and on the marriage license it lists her new surname as my last name. However, she has never updated her driver’s license or changed her name with social security. The only place she has used my last name was on the marriage license and everything else has her “maiden” name.

I called the clerks office and spoke to 3 different people who weren't 100% sure but said I need to make sure to get it correct prior to getting an index number. They suggested I consult an attorney or look online. I posted on one forum and they said since she never updated anything it's unlikely that she is considered to have legally changed her name and I should stick with the maiden name on the forms. They also suggested I consult an attorney.

I called one attorney and he said that he thinks she legally changed her name when we got married despite not updating her records and I should use my last name for her on the forms. I asked about whether or not she would have trouble getting the forms notarized and he said she may have to get her license updated before the divorce. Since I seem to have been getting mixed messages I spoke to a different attorney and he said if she didn't update her SS and license then she didn't legally change her name and I should stick with the maiden name. Now I have no idea what to do! Any help would be greatly appreciated, thanks!

 

[BL]

I'd say use the married name. Just because she chose not to update information is not your problem.

http://www.nycourts.gov/courthelp/faqs/divorce.html

Q. Can I go back to my maiden name after the divorce?

A. Yes, but you have to ask for it in your court papers.

 

[LdiJ]

I'd say use the married name. Just because she chose not to update information is not your problem.

http://www.nycourts.gov/courthelp/faqs/divorce.html

Q. Can I go back to my maiden name after the divorce?

A. Yes, but you have to ask for it in your court papers.

I am not sure that I agree. Government agencies will not recognize a name change until or unless the name has been changed with the SSA.

 

[Zigner]

I am not sure that I agree. Government agencies will not recognize a name change until or unless the name has been changed with the SSA.

That's not (necessarily) true.

What's going on here is that the woman never actually used the new name, thus it was never actually changed. The OP may wish to include both names on the paperwork somehow. Possibly something as simple as Jane Doe (formerly Smith). He should consult with an attorney about the proper format for something like that.

ETA: To head it off - if even one government agency will change a person's name, then your statement isn't true. A school district (a gov't agency) will change a child's name in their records upon presentation of a court-order showing the name change. Heck, I'd bet they'll even update the records of the parent if they come in with the marriage license.

 

[LdiJ]

That's not (necessarily) true.

What's going on here is that the woman never actually used the new name, thus it was never actually changed. The OP may wish to include both names on the paperwork somehow. Possibly something as simple as Jane Doe (formerly Smith). He should consult with an attorney about the proper format for something like that.

ETA: To head it off - if even one government agency will change a person's name, then your statement isn't true. A school district (a gov't agency) will change a child's name in their records upon presentation of a court-order showing the name change. Heck, I'd bet they'll even update the records of the parent if they come in with the marriage license.

That is interesting, because that is one thing that our school district will NOT do. However, I will qualify my comment to say that federal government agencies will not recognize a name change unless it has been changed with the SSA.

 

[TheGeekess]

That's not (necessarily) true.

What's going on here is that the woman never actually used the new name, thus it was never actually changed. The OP may wish to include both names on the paperwork somehow. Possibly something as simple as Jane Doe (formerly Smith). He should consult with an attorney about the proper format for something like that.

ETA: To head it off - if even one government agency will change a person's name, then your statement isn't true. A school district (a gov't agency) will change a child's name in their records upon presentation of a court-order showing the name change. Heck, I'd bet they'll even update the records of the parent if they come in with the marriage license.

Jane Doe Smith aka Jane Doe.

 

[BL]

Besides trying to email a few local Family Law Attorneys for a reply as a courtesy , if your area has a Lawyer Referral service - you may want to consult with one for $50-$60.00 for a 1/2 hr., or if you have time ,try to catch one at the local court house Family law hearing room and ask.

Is it possible to ask the spouse to update her license ?

I was thinking she may be able to obtain a non-license ID card but that may require proofs including SS card .

 

[DBDIY]

That's not (necessarily) true.

What's going on here is that the woman never actually used the new name, thus it was never actually changed. The OP may wish to include both names on the paperwork somehow. Possibly something as simple as Jane Doe (formerly Smith). He should consult with an attorney about the proper format for something like that.

ETA: To head it off - if even one government agency will change a person's name, then your statement isn't true. A school district (a gov't agency) will change a child's name in their records upon presentation of a court-order showing the name change. Heck, I'd bet they'll even update the records of the parent if they come in with the marriage license.

Jane Doe Smith aka Jane Doe.

So she called the NYC bar legal hotline and they said definitively (whereas the family law attorney’s I had spoken to didn’t seem 100% sure) that I should put down Jane Smith aka Jane Doe (with the maiden name following the aka). I think I’ll just go with that - I could just use the married name but I’m trying to make this as easy for her as possible so that it remains uncontested.

Anyway, thanks to everyone for taking the time to respond to my question. I’ll try to update the thread later when I know for sure how it works out.

 

[tuffbrk]

My husband had checked off that I was taking his name on the marriage license. I didn't. I also didn't change it on my SS card. As a result, without the proof of an updated SS card with a "new" last name, it couldn't be changed anywhere else. For example, an employer could not change the name on a paycheck without an updated copy of a SS card reflecting that name. When I filed for divorce (NJ), all of the documentation reflected my (maiden) name. My attorney considered noting an AKA, however his research indicated that since I did not use my ex's name on any legal documents, it was not my legal name.

 

[DBDIY]

My husband had checked off that I was taking his name on the marriage license. I didn't. I also didn't change it on my SS card. As a result, without the proof of an updated SS card with a "new" last name, it couldn't be changed anywhere else. For example, an employer could not change the name on a paycheck without an updated copy of a SS card reflecting that name. When I filed for divorce (NJ), all of the documentation reflected my (maiden) name. My attorney considered noting an AKA, however his research indicated that since I did not use my ex's name on any legal documents, it was not my legal name.

Shoot, now you're making me nervous that the way I'm doing it won't be correct. Hopefully the AKA will cover both. I'm filing tomorrow morning and already got it notarized with the AKA so hopefully there are no problems.