to be honest what should I do.. I REALLY NEED LAW ADVICE!

[acenicole]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Florida, now lets place back time and put this up so yall can understand from the very very very beginning and get to the point cause this will get very confusing very fast! well im gay and im 15 I've felt like not attracted to men at all now I've been liking this girl who has a year in a half difference than me she's 13 and we've finally started going out but when I meet her mom the and her dad her mom basically tells me to politely go f myself now she barely knows me. the reason she met me was because I was taking my girlfriend to soccer practice and she had to stop home and insisted i go with her and ofcourse my dumb self agreed because I wasn't thinking but by then we were late because of the bus now her mother was on my case because we were late saying that my girlfriend is now not focusing in school basically treating me like I'm stupid (which im not) and using the fact we were late on her side anyway continuing from this she also said I was walking her daughter and her escorting her and talking as if I was walking her daughter like a dog which by the way I caught that by the handle and almost told the lady off but I was very respectful to her and stayed quiet and took the things she was saying. after words being upset and my girlfriend having her phone and everything taken away at school she told me she couldn't go out with me and by 6th period I ended up punching a locker when I found out that she didn't want to end things and that she was a mess during kunch when she told me so me rushing to her 6th period and saw her outside I hugged her and told her I was sorry for being a douche towards her. after that we started emailing it only took a week for her mom to find out and she confronted ME at the bus stop and told me that she said she was going to call the police when I turned 16 which won't be till next year because I already turned 15 on December 11th of 2014 so I'm technically a year and a half difference from her and in Florida its legal to be 4 years apart from what I've read legal wise. anyway, after the bus stop harassment 2 of the 4 bus drivers witnessed this along with a lot of school kids I also found out that the lady was walking up and down the bus ways looking for me and even told her daughter to look for me in bus two which. caused the one of the bus drivers to ask who she was waiting for her reply was from what the bus driver told me a "friend" now when I hurd that that scared me when an adult means by that it usually is ment politely but it is also ment aggressively now what I didn't understand was why infront of the buses and why not wait for me infront of bus 2 both bus drivers almost called the police anyway. after words at school this girl approaches me and apologizes which only angers me more because I haven't cried like that in a long time. now after me taking the b.s and still forgiving her and my mother asking me how I took everything I still stayed with her cause i feel different with her. now afterwords after seeing her at soccer practice and stuff she ends up asking me to go to her game not a few days and asks me fr my email cause her mother pretty much did something and what not with her email and she couldn't email me then we email and talked and it didn't take nothing but 4 days and yesterday her father emailed me this.


Their will be no more rendezvous or meetings between you and ****** Yes she has been busted. And I have had enough of you harassing my minor daughter. This is her father talking now. And you have gone to far with this relationship. I will be involving the authorities and the school administrators if you don't put an end to this right now. She is too naive and young to know what love is about. And you have come into her life and poisoned her mind about this so called relationship. I hope you show this to your parents, because I disapprove of this relationship, be it that you are a boy or a girl. my daughter is trying to get an education not a relationship. And I will do everything in my powers to protect her. Consider this your final warning. Leave my daughter alone, or you will feel my wrath. This account will not be active after today. I have your information and all your conversations that has been going on with ******, and I will use this when I have to involve the authorities. The trust that we had with ****** is now gone. Don't think about meeting her in the park during soccer practice because she will not be alone. LEAVE ****** ALONE!!!!!!!!

I have not harassed her at all if anything I have told her if she wanted me to leave her alone to tell me to my face and just tell me I will not be upset by it and that i would not force her into anything nor would I make her do anything she didn't want to do I told her if she didn't want to do anything that it was up to her like this can someone please tell me what The f i should do. and someone who is gay friendly please!

also they say whether im a male or a female wouldn't matter then why would they include the part of poisoning her mind. idk.

 

[cbg]

She is 13 years old. It is 100% up to her parents whether she is allowed to see or talk to you or not. Bottom line, if dad says no, it is no. It is not up to her; it is up to Dad, and will be for another 5 years.

What should you do? You should keep away from his minor child, the way he says. The law is 100% on dad's side here, and not even a little bit on yours.

 

[Ohiogal]

She might want to google the story of Kaitlyn Hunt -- a florida teen who is spending time in jail.

 

[acenicole]

She might want to google the story of Kaitlyn Hunt -- a florida teen who is spending time in jail.

who me or her? and there's nothing sexual between Us that I can promise

 

[acenicole]

She is 13 years old. It is 100% up to her parents whether she is allowed to see or talk to you or not. Bottom line, if dad says no, it is no. It is not up to her; it is up to Dad, and will be for another 5 years.

What should you do? You should keep away from his minor child, the way he says. The law is 100% on dad's side here, and not even a little bit on yours.

yeah but heres the thing. how am I harrassing her when she comes to me most of the time..shouldn't he be talking to my mother instead of me? and aren't i a minor too? like im only a year and a half older than her.

 

[cbg]

It doesn't matter whether you are harassing her or not. Dad said no. Therefore it is no.

Dad could go to your mother. He could also go to the police. Whether you are also a minor or not is immaterial. You don't get to ignore what her father says just because you are a minor.

 

[stealth2]

You really need to back off. The girl's parents do not want her in a relationship at this age. Period. That is their prerogative as her parents.

 

[TigerD]

well im gay and im 15

I'm not going to engage in condescending remarks about you being too young to be gay. However, you are at a very difficult age where exploring who you are is extremely important and growing more challenging every year. At 15, everything seems so larger than life and kids seek to belong - more so when they are not getting that sense of belonging at home. Since you asked that we be honest about what you should do, my advice is not to make sweeping declarations and massive life altering decisions. The fact, as unpleasant as it is to say, is that sexual identity is tied to sexual activity in America. And legally 15 is too young to play ball - no matter which team you bat for.

I've felt like not attracted to men at all

Good. You are 15 - you shouldn't be. You should be trying to figure out who you are as a person. There is nothing wrong with spending time with boys or girls - but don't be in too much of a hurry to grow up, it will happen. Take your time and be ready for it. Adult decisions have adult consequences and deserve adult forethought.

now I've been liking this girl who has a year in a half difference than me she's 13 and we've finally started going out but when I meet her mom the and her dad her mom basically tells me to politely go f myself now she barely knows me.

That is unfortunate. Perhaps you present yourself in manner that makes them uncomfortable and they don't want that particular influence on their daughter. While it may seem like 13 is very close to 15, there is a vast gulf in maturity for many kids. A 13-year-old needs more hands-on parenting than a 15-year-old. A 15-year-old isn't likely to comprehend that without help because their frame of reference is rather small. This is the purpose of parenting. We make decisions for our kids and teach them how to make their own decisions as they grow up. If you respect your desired girlfriend, you must respect her parent's wishes and work to gain their acceptance. Any other path is selfish and more likely to cause her long term pain then build a relationship between you.

after words being upset and my girlfriend having her phone and everything taken away at school she told me she couldn't go out with me and by 6th period I ended up punching a locker...

As a parent, your anger would concern me. You didn't just "end up" punching a locker. You were unable to process and deal with your own emotions and lashed out. I would be very reluctant to allow my kids to spend much time within your blast radius. I'm guessing that you have some problems at home that you haven't had any assistance in dealing with and thus you haven't learn how to process complex feelings.

when I found out that she didn't want to end things and that she was a mess during kunch when she told me so me rushing to her 6th period and saw her outside I hugged her and told her I was sorry for being a douche towards her. after that we started emailing it only took a week for her mom to find out and she confronted ME at the bus stop and told me that she said she was going to call the police when I turned 16

As a general rule of thumb, if someone threatens to call the police on you, you should believe them. Don't for a second think that your age will protect you for the next year. You are coming across as a selfish, abusive person. At 15, that makes you a jerk. At 16-18 that will eventually make you a defendant and subsequently an inmate.

after words at school this girl approaches me and apologizes which only angers me more because I haven't cried like that in a long time. now after me taking the b.s and still forgiving her and my mother asking me how I took everything I still stayed with her cause i feel different with her.

Why you stayed with her? Really? You have been told to stay away from her.

Their will be no more rendezvous or meetings between you and ****** Yes she has been busted. And I have had enough of you harassing my minor daughter. This is her father talking now. And you have gone to far with this relationship. I will be involving the authorities and the school administrators if you don't put an end to this right now. She is too naive and young to know what love is about. And you have come into her life and poisoned her mind about this so called relationship. I hope you show this to your parents, because I disapprove of this relationship, be it that you are a boy or a girl. my daughter is trying to get an education not a relationship. And I will do everything in my powers to protect her. Consider this your final warning. Leave my daughter alone, or you will feel my wrath. This account will not be active after today. I have your information and all your conversations that has been going on with ******, and I will use this when I have to involve the authorities. The trust that we had with ****** is now gone. Don't think about meeting her in the park during soccer practice because she will not be alone. LEAVE ****** ALONE!!!!!!!!

Sounds much fairer than I would have phrased it. You have had multiple warnings - you need to stay away from her. Period.

I have not harassed her at all if anything I have told her if she wanted me to leave her alone to tell me to my face and just tell me I will not be upset by it and that i would not force her into anything nor would I make her do anything she didn't want to do I told her if she didn't want to do anything that it was up to her like this can someone please tell me what The f i should do. and someone who is gay friendly please!

You need to stay away from her. You are going to wind up in a lot of trouble if you persist in this. Romeo and Juliet was not a great love story. They both died young and never got experience that love during the ups and downs of a long life. You may need to talk to therapist about your feeling and dealing with them.

Very few teenagers realize the truth of the next statement - I didn't when I was a teenager either: There will be other girls, other loves, and other losses. They will all hurt when lost. And that is what makes you both human and humane.

TD

 

[Proserpina]

I'm not going to engage in condescending remarks about you being too young to be gay. However, you are at a very difficult age where exploring who you are is extremely important and growing more challenging every year. At 15, everything seems so larger than life and kids seek to belong - more so when they are not getting that sense of belonging at home. Since you asked that we be honest about what you should do, my advice is not to make sweeping declarations and massive life altering decisions. The fact, as unpleasant as it is to say, is that sexual identity is tied to sexual activity in America. And legally 15 is too young to play ball - no matter which team you bat for.


Good. You are 15 - you shouldn't be. You should be trying to figure out who you are as a person. There is nothing wrong with spending time with boys or girls - but don't be in too much of a hurry to grow up, it will happen. Take your time and be ready for it. Adult decisions have adult consequences and deserve adult forethought.


That is unfortunate. Perhaps you present yourself in manner that makes them uncomfortable and they don't want that particular influence on their daughter. While it may seem like 13 is very close to 15, there is a vast gulf in maturity for many kids. A 13-year-old needs more hands-on parenting than a 15-year-old. A 15-year-old isn't likely to comprehend that without help because their frame of reference is rather small. This is the purpose of parenting. We make decisions for our kids and teach them how to make their own decisions as they grow up. If you respect your desired girlfriend, you must respect her parent's wishes and work to gain their acceptance. Any other path is selfish and more likely to cause her long term pain then build a relationship between you.


As a parent, your anger would concern me. You didn't just "end up" punching a locker. You were unable to process and deal with your own emotions and lashed out. I would be very reluctant to allow my kids to spend much time within your blast radius. I'm guessing that you have some problems at home that you haven't had any assistance in dealing with and thus you haven't learn how to process complex feelings.


As a general rule of thumb, if someone threatens to call the police on you, you should believe them. Don't for a second think that your age will protect you for the next year. You are coming across as a selfish, abusive person. At 15, that makes you a jerk. At 16-18 that will eventually make you a defendant and subsequently an inmate.


Why you stayed with her? Really? You have been told to stay away from her.


Sounds much fairer than I would have phrased it. You have had multiple warnings - you need to stay away from her. Period.


You need to stay away from her. You are going to wind up in a lot of trouble if you persist in this. Romeo and Juliet was not a great love story. They both died young and never got experience that love during the ups and downs of a long life. You may need to talk to therapist about your feeling and dealing with them.

Very few teenagers realize the truth of the next statement - I didn't when I was a teenager either: There will be other girls, other loves, and other losses. They will all hurt when lost. And that is what makes you both human and humane.

TD

I think this is one of the most incredible posts I've ever seen in this forum.

There's really nothing else to say.

 

[single317dad]

I would add this to TigerD's excellent post, which you should take quite seriously, as a great deal of effort went into it, it's very much the truth, and comes from a neutral third party with no reason to mislead you:

Any decent therapist will teach you the rule of intellect and emotion. While it's all well and good to live much of your life with your "E" over your "I" (your emotions guiding your intellect), when making almost any decision, across the board, it's best to do so with your "I" over your "E" (intellect calling the shots and emotions in check). The majority of teenagers are incapable of these thought processes; that's one reason why society doesn't hold them as accountable (sealing juvenile criminal records, as one example). However, I think if you really sit down and consider your situation and the input you've been given here, you'll come to the right conclusion.

 

[stealth2]

I think this is one of the most incredible posts I've ever seen in this forum.

There's really nothing else to say.

Agreed.
**************...

 

[Shadowbunny]

I have not harassed her at all if anything I have told her if she wanted me to leave her alone to tell me to my face and just tell me I will not be upset by it and that i would not force her into anything nor would I make her do anything she didn't want to do I told her if she didn't want to do anything that it was up to her like this can someone please tell me what The f i should do. and someone who is gay friendly please!

also they say whether im a male or a female wouldn't matter then why would they include the part of poisoning her mind. idk.

Just a postscript to TigerD's remarkable post: it doesn't matter whether SHE wants you to leave her alone - the fact that her parents have told you to leave her alone is the only consideration.

I would hazard a guess that most people over the age of 30 remember very few (if any) of their loves from when they were teens. It's no consolation now, but soon she'll be just a pleasant (we hope) memory.