Can he just show back up and move in?

[needdivorce]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? GA

I was granted a divorce by publication (thanks for the help on this) back in January of this year. My ex vanished in Oct 2013 and I was not able to contact him, I asked his sisters, sent emails, facebook etc to try to end the divorce with no luck. The judge dissolved the marriage in Jan 2015. There was no property to split, as I had owned my house since 1998.

This week, he contacted me and informed me he was on the way "home". I informed him that this was not his home and he was not welcome here, ever. He said we were not divorced because he did not have the papers and he was homeless now, so he was coming here. I do not want him here. Period. Too much hurt. Too much damage.

I assumed we were legally divorced because I have the papers in my file drawer with a judge's signature and filed with the court clerk. Does he have any rights, so to speak, to show up since his newest girlfriend kicked him out and no one will take him in, so that means I have to?

Thanks

 

[Zigner]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? GA

I was granted a divorce by publication (thanks for the help on this) back in January of this year. My ex vanished in Oct 2013 and I was not able to contact him, I asked his sisters, sent emails, facebook etc to try to end the divorce with no luck. The judge dissolved the marriage in Jan 2015. There was no property to split, as I had owned my house since 1998.

This week, he contacted me and informed me he was on the way "home". I informed him that this was not his home and he was not welcome here, ever. He said we were not divorced because he did not have the papers and he was homeless now, so he was coming here. I do not want him here. Period. Too much hurt. Too much damage.

I assumed we were legally divorced because I have the papers in my file drawer with a judge's signature and filed with the court clerk. Does he have any rights, so to speak, to show up since his newest girlfriend kicked him out and no one will take him in, so that means I have to?

Thanks

Based on what you posted, no, not at all. Do not allow him in. If he shows up, call the police. I would suggest that you make a few copies of your divorce paperwork...keep the originals tucked away somewhere that you can get to them in case the police ask to see originals. If he DOES show up, then you may wish to seek a restraining order.

 

[ShyCat]

Does he have any rights, so to speak, to show up since his newest girlfriend kicked him out and no one will take him in, so that means I have to?

No. You are legally divorced whether he believes it or not. If he shows up and won't leave your doorstep, call the police.

 

[not2cleverRed]

And of course, if you haven't changed the locks since he left, now would be the time to do it.

 

[single317dad]

While I absolutely agree that you should not let your ex "come home" and are in no way required to accommodate him, if he takes the initiative to go back to court, this may not be the end of the divorce. Depending on the length of your marriage, he may in fact have some claim to the equity in your home, or other marital assets. If he can convince the judge to vacate the ruling and reopen the case, he'll be a thorn in your side for some time to come.

Best to deny him for as long as possible though.

 

[LdiJ]

While I absolutely agree that you should not let your ex "come home" and are in no way required to accommodate him, if he takes the initiative to go back to court, this may not be the end of the divorce. Depending on the length of your marriage, he may in fact have some claim to the equity in your home, or other marital assets. If he can convince the judge to vacate the ruling and reopen the case, he'll be a thorn in your side for some time to come.

Best to deny him for as long as possible though.

Actually it is the end of the "divorce" itself. What it might not be the end of is any potential property settlement. A judge cannot undo end of the marriage, only re-open the property aspects.

However, that doesn't mean that he has any rights at all at this point, nor any right to enter the home. It only may mean that he, after a great deal of legal effort on his part (and legal cost) might have a claim to a share of any property that could be deemed a marital asset...and even that would be a bit of a legal stretch.

 

[needdivorce]

For some reason, my post was ate.

How much of my house is he entitled to? My house is a 98 double wide mobile home that sits on my parents' land. I am still making payments on it. We were married in Nov 2011 and he left in Oct 2013. He did not work from Dec 2012 until he left in Oct 2014. This, among other reasons is one of the reasons that the marriage deteriorated. I paid the house payment out of my SSDI. I am disabled and on a fixed income and have no extra money to give him!

 

[Zigner]

I doubt your home is worth more now than it was when you married him...

 

[LdiJ]

I doubt your home is worth more now than it was when you married him...

I agree, there is very little chance that a 15 year old double wide would have gained any real equity/value during the short amount of time you were married. I really do not think that you have anything to worry about as far as property is concerned.

Once again, change the locks, and call the police if he shows up at your house.

 

[single317dad]

How much of my house is he entitled to?

At this point, he is not entitled to any portion of any marital asset assigned to you in the divorce, or any premarital asset you own solely. It would be up to him to make the effort to reopen the case and argue differently.

 

[needdivorce]

He showed!

My ex decide to show up yesterday afternoon, just after I got my daughter off the bus. When the car pulled in, I naturally went to see who it was. When I realized it was him, I told him he needed to leave. I managed to get the front door shut and locked before he got to the porch and yelled for my daughter to lock the back door. He came up on the porch and began beating on the door saying I had to let him in. I told him no and he needed to leave now or I was calling the sheriff's department. He kept yelling and screaming, so I called 911 and told them what was going on.

While I was on the phone, my daughter got on her phone and called her brother and told him my ex was trying to break in and to come help us. She is 12 and was hysterical. As my son pulled into the yard, my ex put his foot through the door and came in the house after me. My son got to him as he grabbed me and hit me in the face (I now have a black eye from this). My son, protecting his mom (I am disabled btw) jumped on him and proceeded to kick his tail. 911 was still on the line and heard him come through the door and heard the fighting.

The deputies got here finally (those 7 minutes seemed like hours, I tell you) and my ex was arrested for breaking into my house and assault on me. They are going to see if any other charges can be filed. My son was initially in cuffs until they figured out who was who, but he was released here at home with no charges.

I have never been so scared in my life. I am thankful my son was close by or things could have been nasty. I am equally grateful my son had been at school, so he did not have a gun with him or it could have gotten equally nasty. I have never seen my kid as mad as he was yesterday.

 

[single317dad]

Don't forget to petition the court for a restraining order, if it's not issued automatically as part of the criminal proceedings.

Coming from a violent upbringing, I actually see the son showing up and fighting as a negative. Adult problems should be handled by adults (and the police as necessary). As someone who felt I had to assault my stepfather more than once, that didn't do me any favors later in life. You're lucky your son was not arrested as well. Food for thought.

 

[Ladyback1]

Don't forget to petition the court for a restraining order, if it's not issued automatically as part of the criminal proceedings.

Coming from a violent upbringing, I actually see the son showing up and fighting as a negative. Adult problems should be handled by adults (and the police as necessary). As someone who felt I had to assault my stepfather more than once, that didn't do me any favors later in life. You're lucky your son was not arrested as well. Food for thought.

Would you feel the same way if the son had pulled up to the house and a stranger was kicking in the door?

I disagree with you on this one. It wasn't about an "adult problem". The OP's son was defending and protecting disabled mom and young sister.

(and while improbable, OP's son could be an adult... )

 

[needdivorce]

Would you feel the same way if the son had pulled up to the house and a stranger was kicking in the door?

I disagree with you on this one. It wasn't about an "adult problem". The OP's son was defending and protecting disabled mom and young sister.

(and while improbable, OP's son could be an adult... )

My son is 18, so legally, yes he is an adult. I honestly do not believe I could have lasted until the police got here if my son had not shown up and helped. I took one blow to the head and that was enough to cause problems.

 

[not2cleverRed]

Well, you ex certainly isn't much of a charmer.

In addition to the previous advice, perhaps he should have to pay for repairs to your home.