Gender biased

[EstrellaJ4]

New York: Can a school/day care not accept a student because she is not wearing a dress? My daughters school dress code is a dress for girls and pants for boys. They are now threatening to not let her attend if she doesn't wear a dress.

 

[TheGeekess]

New York: Can a school/day care not accept a student because she is not wearing a dress? My daughters school dress code is a dress for girls and pants for boys. They are now threatening to not let her attend if she doesn't wear a dress.

If she doesn't follow the dress code, yes, they can stop her from attending. If you enrolled her, you were aware of the requirements, so this should not be a problem.

 

[cbg]

Multiple courts have ruled that having gender-based differing dress codes is NOT illegal discrimination.

 

[EstrellaJ4]

Dress code

If she doesn't follow the dress code, yes, they can stop her from attending. If you enrolled her, you were aware of the requirements, so this should not be a problem.

They didn't send the dress code until after we applied.

 

[CdwJava]

New York: Can a school/day care not accept a student because she is not wearing a dress? My daughters school dress code is a dress for girls and pants for boys. They are now threatening to not let her attend if she doesn't wear a dress.

Is this a private DAY CARE or private school? Or, is it a public school?

In most instances dress codes are legal. If this is a public school, there may be accommodations that can be applied for.

 

[Zigner]

They didn't send the dress code until after we applied.

Thanks for sharing - see the response above.

 

[not2cleverRed]

They didn't send the dress code until after we applied.

Are you asking about an application being denied because she showed up to a campus interview in something other than a dress?

Or are you asking about whether she was accepted but not allowed to attend if she doesn't comply with the dress code?

Why shouldn't a school be allowed to enforce its dress code? Why would you apply to a school without checking out a brochure or website - that information is usually proudly proclaimed in promotional literature. Is there a religious reason for your daughter not to comply with the dress code? Or a medical reason?

 

[LdiJ]

New York: Can a school/day care not accept a student because she is not wearing a dress? My daughters school dress code is a dress for girls and pants for boys. They are now threatening to not let her attend if she doesn't wear a dress.

Personally...I would be switching schools. My child would never attend a school with that kind of dress code, on principle.

I am 58 years old and until I was 13, skirts or dresses were required for all female students in our public school system. Anyone who is familiar with REAL winter does not understand just how unfair that was. We are not even talking about women's lib or anything else like that, but the utter unfairness of requiring female children to be less warm than male children.

I, and about 70% of the female students at my junior high school, along with the support of our mothers and a lot of our fathers too, decided one day that enough was enough. We all made a pact to show up to school the next day in pants (although at the time we called them slacks). My father was president of the school board at the time and while he did not overtly support what I was doing he watched me leave the house that morning and gave me my usual hug on the way out the door.

When we all started entering the school the administrated TRIED to separate us and started calling parents...but when our numbers got so big it was impossible and they finally gave up and sent us to class. On top of that most of the parents that they did call said "heck no" we are not picking her up. Some mothers even brought slacks to school for the daughters that didn't have the guts to do it in the first place, to change into. By the end of the day the administration announced over the loudspeaker that as of that day, girls were permitted to wear slacks to school.

We didn't just get things changed for OUR junior high, we got them changed for the 20 schools (elementary, junior high and high school) in the district.

If some school tries to tell me that my granddaughter cannot attend school unless she wears a dress or skirt, that is the LAST day she will attend that school, and I will go on a serious campaign to make sure that its the last day for as many other students whose parents I can reach.

Off my soapbox now.

 

[ajkroy]

I am wondering if the student in question identifies with the other gender, and perhaps that is why they wish to wear pants? With so many schools having gender-neutral bathrooms nowadays (my own school included), it seems antiquated and un-PC to separate students by gender within a dress code.

 

[Proserpina]

Personally...I would be switching schools. My child would never attend a school with that kind of dress code, on principle.

I am 58 years old and until I was 13, skirts or dresses were required for all female students in our public school system. Anyone who is familiar with REAL winter does not understand just how unfair that was. We are not even talking about women's lib or anything else like that, but the utter unfairness of requiring female children to be less warm than male children.

I, and about 70% of the female students at my junior high school, along with the support of our mothers and a lot of our fathers too, decided one day that enough was enough. We all made a pact to show up to school the next day in pants (although at the time we called them slacks). My father was president of the school board at the time and while he did not overtly support what I was doing he watched me leave the house that morning and gave me my usual hug on the way out the door.

When we all started entering the school the administrated TRIED to separate us and started calling parents...but when our numbers got so big it was impossible and they finally gave up and sent us to class. On top of that most of the parents that they did call said "heck no" we are not picking her up. Some mothers even brought slacks to school for the daughters that didn't have the guts to do it in the first place, to change into. By the end of the day the administration announced over the loudspeaker that as of that day, girls were permitted to wear slacks to school.

We didn't just get things changed for OUR junior high, we got them changed for the 20 schools (elementary, junior high and high school) in the district.

If some school tries to tell me that my granddaughter cannot attend school unless she wears a dress or skirt, that is the LAST day she will attend that school, and I will go on a serious campaign to make sure that its the last day for as many other students whose parents I can reach.

Off my soapbox now.

A "real" winter?

What is a "real" winter?

Is winter only a "real" winter if the average daily temp drops below zero?

Does that mean schools should never be able to ban daisy dukes & spaghetti straps in the midst of summer?

 

[CdwJava]

Oh, schools out here have banned Daisy Duke style shorts and spaghetti straps for years - summer or not.

And, dress codes are lawful even in liberal CA (though we have to permit an opt-out process for anyone who objects ... though that tends to set that student apart from the others). The OP's query may very well involve a NON PUBLIC pre-school. I don't know about NY, but out here there are exceedingly few public pre-schools, and those tend to be First-Five or related programs. I suspect that NY may be similar in that most pre-schools are private - and not required attendance - and can set most any dress code they choose.

 

[not2cleverRed]

Oh, schools out here have banned Daisy Duke style shorts and spaghetti straps for years - summer or not.

And, dress codes are lawful even in liberal CA (though we have to permit an opt-out process for anyone who objects ... though that tends to set that student apart from the others). The OP's query may very well involve a NON PUBLIC pre-school. I don't know about NY, but out here there are exceedingly few public pre-schools, and those tend to be First-Five or related programs. I suspect that NY may be similar in that most pre-schools are private - and not required attendance - and can set most any dress code they choose.

There are some public pre-K programs in NY - my daughter went to one. Although in rural areas universal pre-K is not so universally available...

For a while our school district had what was supposed to be a phased in uniform dress code, but we finally got rid of that school sup., and yes, there was an opt-out form, which I made a point of signing - mostly because I think it's ridiculous to restrict what colors a kindergartener can wear.

Charter schools *are* public schools, and some of them require uniforms. The local charter school's uniform policy is stricter than the parochial school. Personally, I fail to see how totally black shoes and sneakers is going to increase your understanding of math, or how a stripe on the top of your tube socks will affect your reading comprehension, but I guess that's why we never filled out an application. (Felt vindicated when the principal of the charter school was quoted in the news as saying he only worries if parents with certain skin colors complain.)

OP has not elaborated on her question, so we really can't be specific.

But yeah, a school can have a uniform policy. And they can enforce their policy. And if you don't like it, and can't opt out, then you can look for a different school. If there was a hefty application fee... well, shouldn't one ask such things before ponying up a hefty application fee or signing anything?

 

[Proserpina]

Oh, schools out here have banned Daisy Duke style shorts and spaghetti straps for years - summer or not.

And, dress codes are lawful even in liberal CA (though we have to permit an opt-out process for anyone who objects ... though that tends to set that student apart from the others). The OP's query may very well involve a NON PUBLIC pre-school. I don't know about NY, but out here there are exceedingly few public pre-schools, and those tend to be First-Five or related programs. I suspect that NY may be similar in that most pre-schools are private - and not required attendance - and can set most any dress code they choose.

At least the point was made.

 

[CdwJava]

Having worked in areas with some depressed economic conditions, I found that uniforms were actually very effective. For one reason, the policy eliminated much of the competition among the students for the best clothes, or to compare labels from Nordstrom and name brands to Kmart and Wal-Mart kids. Not to mention the fact that limiting colors and items such as hats, shoelaces and bandannas effectively eliminated flashy gang-related displays. For the poorer kids the clothing could often be found cheaper than the clothing the kids might otherwise want in order to fit in at the school.

Ironically, the public school uniform policy was supported very strongly by the minority community and opposed only by a small number of largely well-to-do white parents. (one of whom had a trouble-making 12 year old daughter that did not respect rules or authority, and whose mom insisted that she spoke to her daughter as a peer and an "adult" and not as a child ... the daughter even referred to mom by her first name! She was not the best choice of speaker for the anti-uniform parents at that particular meeting.) We had only one school in the district where more than a quarter of children had opted out, the rest had about a 90%+ inclusion rate.

But, even when I went to public school in the 60s and 70s, we did not have uniforms. We had a dress code (corduroy pants or slacks, and button up shirts for boys, and dresses for girls - slacks in the higher grades) that was strictly enforced. In high school they relaxed a bit, but no jeans and no T-shirts (though by my senior year clean and unfaded blue jeans were considered appropriate).

 

[LdiJ]

Having worked in areas with some depressed economic conditions, I found that uniforms were actually very effective. For one reason, the policy eliminated much of the competition among the students for the best clothes, or to compare labels from Nordstrom and name brands to Kmart and Wal-Mart kids. Not to mention the fact that limiting colors and items such as hats, shoelaces and bandannas effectively eliminated flashy gang-related displays. For the poorer kids the clothing could often be found cheaper than the clothing the kids might otherwise want in order to fit in at the school.

Ironically, the public school uniform policy was supported very strongly by the minority community and opposed only by a small number of largely well-to-do white parents. (one of whom had a trouble-making 12 year old daughter that did not respect rules or authority, and whose mom insisted that she spoke to her daughter as a peer and an "adult" and not as a child ... the daughter even referred to mom by her first name! She was not the best choice of speaker for the anti-uniform parents at that particular meeting.) We had only one school in the district where more than a quarter of children had opted out, the rest had about a 90%+ inclusion rate.

But, even when I went to public school in the 60s and 70s, we did not have uniforms. We had a dress code (corduroy pants or slacks, and button up shirts for boys, and dresses for girls - slacks in the higher grades) that was strictly enforced. In high school they relaxed a bit, but no jeans and no T-shirts (though by my senior year clean and unfaded blue jeans were considered appropriate).

I have no problem with school uniforms. Our local school district has a uniform policy. I only have a problem with girls being required to wear skirts.