Am I obligated to tell my now divorced husband I am pregnant when I was unaware?

[Greensox]

I was recently divorced by my now ex husband and found out in the most horrible way. He went behind my back and didn't notify me of court and was able to gain custody of our 2 yr old daughter because of false charges of abuse. (Trying to fight him for purgatory now) at the time this happened I had left with my daughter and was not aware I was pregnant. The divorce has been finalized and I am now trying to regain custody of my daughter. Am I obligated to tell him in the state of WV that I am pregnant even though the divorce is now final and I was not aware I was pregnant and have only known for 3 months that I am? Will it go against me in the court of law while fighting for custody?

 

[Eekamouse]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?

What state are you in and is the child his?

 

[Zigner]

If the child is born less than 10 months after the divorce was finalized, then your (ex-)husband is considered the legal father of the child.

 

[Greensox]

What state are you in and is the child his?

I lived in WV but now AR and yes

 

[Eekamouse]

I lived in WV but now AR and yes

And you want to know if you can get away with not telling him you're pregnant with his child? What's wrong with you?

 

[Greensox]

If the child is born less than 10 months after the divorce was finalized, then your (ex-)husband is considered the legal father of the child.

Yes I am aware of that, but I'm asking if it will go against me in any way because I was not aware at the time of the divorce or that I was pregnant. I intended on filing for divorce myself in the state I now reside in but was beaten to the punch and not notified I had court. He now has custody of my daughter (2yrs). I left him because of verbal, and sexual abuse to me and neglect to our child by him. He has custody because he claimed I was physically abusive to him and claimed I did not want our daughter or anything to do with her since she was born. Because of his failure to notify me of court he was able to testify without my aperance and get away with lying under oath to obtain our daughter. I am fearful of her life and safety, but cannot currently do anything in my power as of now until I am back in town (I had court regarding the possible reopening of the case in WV today and was denied) I need to get a lawyer, but I'm afraid to mention I'm pregnant for this babies sake.

 

[Greensox]

And you want to know if you can get away with not telling him you're pregnant with his child? What's wrong with you?

I did not leave in spite because I wanted to, I left for mine and my daughters safety as I posted in previous pose and will post again here.

I'm asking if it will go against me in any way because I was not aware at the time of the divorce or that I was pregnant. I intended on filing for divorce myself in the state I now reside in but was beaten to the punch and not notified I had court. He now has custody of my daughter (2yrs). I left him because of verbal, and sexual abuse to me and neglect to our child by him. He has custody because he claimed I was physically abusive to him and claimed I did not want our daughter or anything to do with her since she was born. Because of his failure to notify me of court he was able to testify without my aperance and get away with lying under oath to obtain our daughter. I am fearful of her life and safety, but cannot currently do anything in my power as of now until I am back in town (I had court regarding the possible reopening of the case in WV today and was denied) I need to get a lawyer, but I'm afraid to mention I'm pregnant for this babies sake.

 

[Zigner]

I don't think I was unclear. He IS the child-to-be's legal father, whether you tell him or not.

 

[not2cleverRed]

I did not leave in spite because I wanted to, I left for mine and my daughters safety as I posted in previous pose and will post again here.

I'm asking if it will go against me in any way because I was not aware at the time of the divorce or that I was pregnant. I intended on filing for divorce myself in the state I now reside in but was beaten to the punch and not notified I had court. He now has custody of my daughter (2yrs). I left him because of verbal, and sexual abuse to me and neglect to our child by him. He has custody because he claimed I was physically abusive to him and claimed I did not want our daughter or anything to do with her since she was born. Because of his failure to notify me of court he was able to testify without my aperance and get away with lying under oath to obtain our daughter. I am fearful of her life and safety, but cannot currently do anything in my power as of now until I am back in town (I had court regarding the possible reopening of the case in WV today and was denied) I need to get a lawyer, but I'm afraid to mention I'm pregnant for this babies sake.

Look, ignoring unpleasant realities isn't helping you.

You messed up first by crossing state lines without going through court. The correct way would have been to contact a local DV shelter/organization, get custody in WV, and then petition to move to AR.

You didn't do that, so he was able to pull a fast one on you. Because there is no legal paper trail indicating he ever abused you, and there was no paper trail indicating you were interested in legal custody. And you left the state, so the onus wasn't on him to hunt you down. Yes, he had to show that you had been served - but depending on the circumstances, service by publication is sufficient. (Does anyone under 80 spend time reading all those tiny notices in the newspaper?)

Lies and obfuscation have not served you well.

Contact a local DV group and see if they can help you. In addition to emotional support, etc., they sometimes can help with legal assistance - or point you in the right direction. Your ex-husband is the legal father of this child. You want to make sure when this child is born that this legality is recognized, you file for custody ASAP.

Oh, and my motto is that there are 2 types of people you don't lie to: your doctor and your lawyer. So yes, any lawyer you talk to needs to know you're pregnant - it's legally relevant.

 

[LdiJ]

Look, ignoring unpleasant realities isn't helping you.

You messed up first by crossing state lines without going through court. The correct way would have been to contact a local DV shelter/organization, get custody in WV, and then petition to move to AR.

You didn't do that, so he was able to pull a fast one on you. Because there is no legal paper trail indicating he ever abused you, and there was no paper trail indicating you were interested in legal custody. And you left the state, so the onus wasn't on him to hunt you down. Yes, he had to show that you had been served - but depending on the circumstances, service by publication is sufficient. (Does anyone under 80 spend time reading all those tiny notices in the newspaper?)

Lies and obfuscation have not served you well.

Contact a local DV group and see if they can help you. In addition to emotional support, etc., they sometimes can help with legal assistance - or point you in the right direction. Your ex-husband is the legal father of this child. You want to make sure when this child is born that this legality is recognized, you file for custody ASAP.

Oh, and my motto is that there are 2 types of people you don't lie to: your doctor and your lawyer. So yes, any lawyer you talk to needs to know you're pregnant - it's legally relevant.

And to add: You file for custody of this child, in the state you are living in when the child is born, as that is the state that will have jurisdiction over this child.