What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? - Maryland
Sorry about the length of this. I am looking for some advice.
I am a volunteer scout leader and I have a divorced couple with a child in my unit. I assume the divorce was messy and there is still a lot of bad feelings.
Before the first meeting, mom asked, via email, if the membership guy or I could call her about some questions. I can't remember the specifics about the call, but she was concerned about dad's participation and asked if she could send me the divorce papers. I declined the paperwork at that time.
Let me explain the leadership situation in the unit. This group of scouts began the year without a parent volunteer to lead the group, so I stepped up to fill the gap and prepare a more permanent leader. At the first meeting of the year while the scouts were playing a game, I explained to all of the assembled parents that my plan was to guide the scouts and to find a parent to take over as the long term leader of the group.
Fast forward about 6 weeks. We have had several meetings and we have another parent who has volunteered as the group leader. He is approved by the unit committee chairperson and has begun to lead the meetings. I am helping as his assistant. He has a work emergency and cannot make one of the meetings. I get a call at 4:30 the day of the meeting. I wasn't prepared, but was able to put something together. I arrived to the meeting location early and the divorced couple was there and was helping me set up. I told them that the other leader had a last minute issue and I was going to lead the meeting. Off the cuff, I said that both of them seemed interested and would they consider helping as assistants. I realized I messed up as soon as the words left my mouth. Apparently this was an issue for Mom. She was not happy with the idea of Dad in a leadership role. While I continued the set-up, they had words and Dad left in a huff. Somethings were said by him about the court orders and what-not.
At the end of the meeting, Dad explained his issues and that she was going to slander him and try to get me to keep him from volunteering. He said she would bring up an issue that happened at a baseball game with the coach who was her new-boyfriend. He explained that he had experience leading some other youth activity groups (youth hockey, etc). Mom caught me too after that and asked if she could call me about this. As I was getting in my car to leave they were still arguing in the parking lot. What had I gotten myself into? I really feel sorry for the kids.
She did call me the next day and explained about a past incident where dad lost his temper with a baseball coach. She also said there had been issues with other organizations. I explained that there was nothing finally decided. She said she could send me the divorce papers. I told her okay. I read them when they arrived. I only found a phrase that Dad could not coach any sports team the kids were on until June 2017 (my story takes place since October 2017). The order also that Dad needs to continue to see a psychiatrist until discharged by the psychiatrist. Nothing in the order about abuse or anything like that.
I spoke to the committee chairperson and the new group leader about this and we collectively agree that our duty lies with the kids. We will include the dad as any of the other parents. If either party displays negative behavior, they will be asked to step away (so the kids can't see or witness).
This past week Dad asks to speak to me. He said he knows that the Mom has slandered him and he will be speaking to his attorney. He asked if she had sent me any emails. I said that she had. He asked me to not delete them because he may need to subpoena them. Dad emails me the next day and asks that I send him the email. If I don't he will get his attorney to subpoena it.
I am looking for what my options would be. 1) Send the email to Dad. 2) ask Dad for the email address and name of his attorney and send the emails to Dad and the attorney 3) Tell Dad that he will need to have the email subpoenaed. 4) something else...
Both parents seem to be pretty nice, away from each other. The unit is sticking with the position that Dad and Mom will be helpers like any of the other parents. I feel that Dad's behavior in this is a bit childish and Mom is being a bit vindictive and neither should be leaders in the unit.
Thanks for your help
Sorry about the length of this. I am looking for some advice.
I am a volunteer scout leader and I have a divorced couple with a child in my unit. I assume the divorce was messy and there is still a lot of bad feelings.
Before the first meeting, mom asked, via email, if the membership guy or I could call her about some questions. I can't remember the specifics about the call, but she was concerned about dad's participation and asked if she could send me the divorce papers. I declined the paperwork at that time.
Let me explain the leadership situation in the unit. This group of scouts began the year without a parent volunteer to lead the group, so I stepped up to fill the gap and prepare a more permanent leader. At the first meeting of the year while the scouts were playing a game, I explained to all of the assembled parents that my plan was to guide the scouts and to find a parent to take over as the long term leader of the group.
Fast forward about 6 weeks. We have had several meetings and we have another parent who has volunteered as the group leader. He is approved by the unit committee chairperson and has begun to lead the meetings. I am helping as his assistant. He has a work emergency and cannot make one of the meetings. I get a call at 4:30 the day of the meeting. I wasn't prepared, but was able to put something together. I arrived to the meeting location early and the divorced couple was there and was helping me set up. I told them that the other leader had a last minute issue and I was going to lead the meeting. Off the cuff, I said that both of them seemed interested and would they consider helping as assistants. I realized I messed up as soon as the words left my mouth. Apparently this was an issue for Mom. She was not happy with the idea of Dad in a leadership role. While I continued the set-up, they had words and Dad left in a huff. Somethings were said by him about the court orders and what-not.
At the end of the meeting, Dad explained his issues and that she was going to slander him and try to get me to keep him from volunteering. He said she would bring up an issue that happened at a baseball game with the coach who was her new-boyfriend. He explained that he had experience leading some other youth activity groups (youth hockey, etc). Mom caught me too after that and asked if she could call me about this. As I was getting in my car to leave they were still arguing in the parking lot. What had I gotten myself into? I really feel sorry for the kids.
She did call me the next day and explained about a past incident where dad lost his temper with a baseball coach. She also said there had been issues with other organizations. I explained that there was nothing finally decided. She said she could send me the divorce papers. I told her okay. I read them when they arrived. I only found a phrase that Dad could not coach any sports team the kids were on until June 2017 (my story takes place since October 2017). The order also that Dad needs to continue to see a psychiatrist until discharged by the psychiatrist. Nothing in the order about abuse or anything like that.
I spoke to the committee chairperson and the new group leader about this and we collectively agree that our duty lies with the kids. We will include the dad as any of the other parents. If either party displays negative behavior, they will be asked to step away (so the kids can't see or witness).
This past week Dad asks to speak to me. He said he knows that the Mom has slandered him and he will be speaking to his attorney. He asked if she had sent me any emails. I said that she had. He asked me to not delete them because he may need to subpoena them. Dad emails me the next day and asks that I send him the email. If I don't he will get his attorney to subpoena it.
I am looking for what my options would be. 1) Send the email to Dad. 2) ask Dad for the email address and name of his attorney and send the emails to Dad and the attorney 3) Tell Dad that he will need to have the email subpoenaed. 4) something else...
Both parents seem to be pretty nice, away from each other. The unit is sticking with the position that Dad and Mom will be helpers like any of the other parents. I feel that Dad's behavior in this is a bit childish and Mom is being a bit vindictive and neither should be leaders in the unit.
Thanks for your help
