Should I let 13 month old child stay overnight?

[stealth2]

I don't think the mom ever sought to have him penalized.

If she did nothing, nor did she receive state aid, then he wouldn't be penalized. But your situation is different - and should remain so (i.e. you do take action) when you're on your feet.

 

[UpAllNight83]

Was that mother receiving state aid? That makes a difference.

I believe so but only for a short time. She married and had second child within 2 years, the stepdad provides for both kids and has even since their divorce.

 

[HRZ]

Any unpaid CS probably hangs over dad's head until child is about 28 in MI.

CS apparently in MI is paid thru the system, not directly to custodial parent.

OP, I don't know if paid counsel would be of great help at this stage...but be sure to follow up on what seems to be court ordered DNA testing and dads ducking of same and keep track of the due process steps to make sure Dad goes on the hook as soon as appropriate.

Paying CS is by itself NOT an issuance of any visitation rights or orders .

 

[UpAllNight83]

Any unpaid CS probably hangs over dad's head until child is about 28 in MI.

CS apparently in MI is paid thru the system, not directly to custodial parent.

OP, I don't know if paid counsel would be of great help at this stage...but be sure to follow up on what seems to be court ordered DNA testing and dads ducking of same and keep track of the due process steps to make sure Dad goes on the hook as soon as appropriate.

Paying CS is by itself NOT an issuance of any visitation rights or orders .

I am basically seeking free consults at the moment because the case is purposely being stalled by him and I cannot afford to retain counsel right now.

Is it standard for unmarried couples to be ordered to submit a DNA test to establish parentage? I was under the impression that one parent has to be denying parenthood and that was when DNA is required. Father told me the case was initiated by him to secure visitation rights but it is unlikely he actually did?

I mistakenly thought that child support and custody are always intertwined. The way they have the steps laid out on the mi child support webpage they are listed together. I know my own ignorance is no excuse for not investigating CS law in MI on my own much sooner.

 

[stealth2]

Generally speaking, when a couple is unmarried unless a father voluntarily steps forward and admits paternity (via an Affidavit of Paternity or similar - whatever the particular state recognizes - a DNA test is rather standard. And, honestly? It's foolish for a man to accept paternity w/o one, especially when unmarried. Mothers should not find it insulting or offensive. When unmarried, custody generally lies with the mother, because, well, there are people who see the child born so maternity is not in question. Child support needs to be filed for & ordered, as does parenting time for the father. They are separate matters.

 

[UpAllNight83]

Thank you to everyone that responded to my posts. Much I didn't know (but should have) was brought to light. His father has now informed me he will be going to jail for at the least 10.5 months at the end of October. I'm guessing my case will be changing sooner than I imagined? Hopefully it's somehow positive in any way if possible.

 

[Just Blue]

Thank you to everyone that responded to my posts. Much I didn't know (but should have) was brought to light. His father has now informed me he will be going to jail for at the least 10.5 months at the end of October. I'm guessing my case will be changing sooner than I imagined? Hopefully it's somehow positive in any way if possible.

At least the State will know where to find him for the DNA test.

BTW...Why is he going to jail?

 

[UpAllNight83]

At least the State will know where to find him for the DNA test.

BTW...Why is he going to jail?

He got a dui in May, his 4th. He told me he was going to get 3 years probation but his lawyer could not get that deal for him. So now he's basically begging to take our child overnight. Him and everything about this situation is off so I will not be budging on this issue now.

 

[Just Blue]

He got a dui in May, his 4th. He told me he was going to get 3 years probation but his lawyer could not get that deal for him. So now he's basically begging to take our child overnight. Him and everything about this situation is off so I will not be budging on this issue now.

Uhaaa yeah. Don't send you baby on an over-night with drunk not-adjudicated Dad. No brainer.

 

[UpAllNight83]

Uhaaa yeah. Don't send you baby on an over-night with drunk not-adjudicated Dad. No brainer.

He's on a breathalyzer tether since May, I just don't know if there's a way to trick it. I am curious why staying overnight has suddenly become so urgent? I'm sure he has some ulterior motive and the urgency only makes me more suspicious.

 

[Just Blue]

He's on a breathalyzer tether since May, I just don't know if there's a way to trick it. I am curious why staying overnight has suddenly become so urgent? I'm sure he has some ulterior motive and the urgency only makes me more suspicious.

How old are you and dad?

 

[stealth2]

How old are you and dad?

Dad has a 15yo. So at least 28? 30?

 

[justalayman]

He's on a breathalyzer tether since May, I just don't know if there's a way to trick it. I am curious why staying overnight has suddenly become so urgent? I'm sure he has some ulterior motive and the urgency only makes me more suspicious.

There are usually ways to trick it.

 

[Just Blue]

Dad has a 15yo. So at least 28? 30?

I only asked because "they" seem young.

 

[stealth2]

I only asked because "they" seem young.

I did wonder about OP when I saw he has a significantly older child...