Building a house with my Girlfriend and now she wants out. What is she entitled to?

[Abigail123]

Hello,

Over the past 2 years my girlfriend and I have been building a house. She has put money into it and I have been doing all the labor with my family. She has recently decided that she wants out and nothing to do with the house due to the expenses. I have agreed to pay back all the money she has put into building it once I get the final and loan for the house. She is now saying that she wants all her money back, plus the interest (the lot has been on loan for interest only payments until its paid off by house loan) and interest on top of everything for her money being invested for 2 years.

She and I legally signed for the lot, but because we are doing interest only payments we don't officially own the lot until its paid off and since we don't have a final on the house yet- we don't have a mortgage on the house yet so don't technically own it. We've used my parents as a "loan" to finish off the building process-my girlfriend made interest payments to their credit line and their credit cards.

Im paying her back for all the money she has put into building the house, but Is she entitled to get all the interest payments that she's paid to my parents credit line back on top of it now that she has decided to back out. She also wants overall interest on her money she put into what was going to be her and my house even though my parents were "our bank" in this situation and they haven't charged her any additional interest for letting us use their credit line over the past 2 years.

I was told that since she doesn't own the lot, she is entitled to get the downpayment back, but not the 2 years of interest payments. Would this be the same with the interest payments she made to my parents credit line and would she be entitled to getting overall interest on her money when she didn't go into it as an investor, she went into it as it being our house together and has been involved with making the decisions with everything.

Any advice is appreciated.

 

[Zigner]

What US state?

Your answers (assuming you are in the US) depend on the agreement you (plural) entered in to with her. If nothing like this was contemplated, and you can't negotiate a mutually agreeable settlement, then you will likely need someone to help sort it out, whether it be binding arbitration or a court.

 

[Abigail123]

Its in California

 

[adjusterjack]

She and I legally signed for the lot, but because we are doing interest only payments we don't officially own the lot until its paid off

That doesn't necessarily follow. You could have been issued a deed with the property securing the loan even if it was interest only.

Better check on that. If she is an owner on the deed then she is "entitled" to whatever she can squeeze out of you in exchange for her signature on a quitclaim deed.

If she is not a deeded owner, then you can write her a check for whatever amount you think is right and see if she sues you for anything else.

 

[LdiJ]

Hello,

Over the past 2 years my girlfriend and I have been building a house. She has put money into it and I have been doing all the labor with my family. She has recently decided that she wants out and nothing to do with the house due to the expenses. I have agreed to pay back all the money she has put into building it once I get the final and loan for the house. She is now saying that she wants all her money back, plus the interest (the lot has been on loan for interest only payments until its paid off by house loan) and interest on top of everything for her money being invested for 2 years.

She and I legally signed for the lot, but because we are doing interest only payments we don't officially own the lot until its paid off and since we don't have a final on the house yet- we don't have a mortgage on the house yet so don't technically own it. We've used my parents as a "loan" to finish off the building process-my girlfriend made interest payments to their credit line and their credit cards.

Im paying her back for all the money she has put into building the house, but Is she entitled to get all the interest payments that she's paid to my parents credit line back on top of it now that she has decided to back out. She also wants overall interest on her money she put into what was going to be her and my house even though my parents were "our bank" in this situation and they haven't charged her any additional interest for letting us use their credit line over the past 2 years.

I was told that since she doesn't own the lot, she is entitled to get the downpayment back, but not the 2 years of interest payments. Would this be the same with the interest payments she made to my parents credit line and would she be entitled to getting overall interest on her money when she didn't go into it as an investor, she went into it as it being our house together and has been involved with making the decisions with everything.

Any advice is appreciated.

What would you think is fair if the roles were reversed. Would you think it fair to have paid interest towards something you will never own? If so, then by all means refuse to reimburse her for the interest.

 

[Litigator22]

Hello,

Over the past 2 years my girlfriend and I have been building a house. She has put money into it and I have been doing all the labor with my family. She has recently decided that she wants out and nothing to do with the house due to the expenses. I have agreed to pay back all the money she has put into building it once I get the final and loan for the house. She is now saying that she wants all her money back, plus the interest (the lot has been on loan for interest only payments until its paid off by house loan) and interest on top of everything for her money being invested for 2 years.

She and I legally signed for the lot, but because we are doing interest only payments we don't officially own the lot until its paid off and since we don't have a final on the house yet- we don't have a mortgage on the house yet so don't technically own it. We've used my parents as a "loan" to finish off the building process-my girlfriend made interest payments to their credit line and their credit cards.

Im paying her back for all the money she has put into building the house, but Is she entitled to get all the interest payments that she's paid to my parents credit line back on top of it now that she has decided to back out. She also wants overall interest on her money she put into what was going to be her and my house even though my parents were "our bank" in this situation and they haven't charged her any additional interest for letting us use their credit line over the past 2 years.

I was told that since she doesn't own the lot, she is entitled to get the downpayment back, but not the 2 years of interest payments. Would this be the same with the interest payments she made to my parents credit line and would she be entitled to getting overall interest on her money when she didn't go into it as an investor, she went into it as it being our house together and has been involved with making the decisions with everything.

Any advice is appreciated.

Well you have put your self in a fine mess and one that MUST be sorted out by your attorney. But you can rest assured that unless there is a binding agreement to the contrary neither of you are obligated to reimburse the other for their individual contributions to the project.

So assuming there is no such pre existing agreement and she wants out of the deal it must be arranged and solidified on terms and conditions that are mutually agreeable. Otherwise it may/will end up in a lawsuit and one possibly involving a judicial sale of the property. All much depending on the status of your respective ownership interests and/or contractual rights to obtain fee simple title to the lot. None of which is made clear by your random posting.

However, under no circumstances should you pay her a red cent until she has quitclaimed or is contractually committed to quitclaim over to you all of her right title and interest in the land.

But again (and let me emphasize) the need of the services of an attorney! Attempting to resolve this without one would only add to the existing chaos. And if you don't think that you two have forged a legal nightmare and an expensive one at that, then just wait!

Lastly, never, never, never purchase or commit to the purchase of real property by joint acquisition unless as a married couple or in a domestic relationship recognized by existing law!

 

[Ohiogal]

Well you have put your self in a fine mess and one that MUST be sorted out by your attorney. But you can rest assured that unless there is a binding agreement to the contrary neither of you are obligated to reimburse the other for their individual contributions to the project.

So assuming there is no such pre existing agreement and she wants out of the deal it must be arranged and solidified on terms and conditions that are mutually agreeable. Otherwise it may/will end up in a lawsuit and one possibly involving a judicial sale of the property. All much depending on the status of your respective ownership interests and/or contractual rights to obtain fee simple title to the lot. None of which is made clear by your random posting.

However, under no circumstances should you pay her a red cent until she has quitclaimed or is contractually committed to quitclaim over to you all of her right title and interest in the land.

But again (and let me emphasize) the need of the services of an attorney! Attempting to resolve this without one would only add to the existing chaos. And if you don't think that you two have forged a legal nightmare and an expensive one at that, then just wait!

Lastly, never, never, never purchase or commit to the purchase of real property by joint acquisition unless as a married couple or in a domestic relationship recognized by existing law!

She would be a fool to quitclaim anything prior to getting paid if she is on the deed. She can also file a partition suit if on the deed and force the sale of the property.

 

[xylene]

What a mess. You didn't have an agreement that specified what would happen in the event of this INCREDIBLY COMMON contingency?

(y'all splitting up was something you SHOULD have planned as a possibility...)

You should consider to both abandon the project depending on what the agreement with your lender (your parents) exactly is.

I am not convinced she is owed a DIME by you and agreeing to repayment was another HUGE HUGE mistake.

It's called sunk costs. Why does she get to recover her sunk costs on a house that never got built from a person she doesn't want to be with?

Y'all need a lawyer yesterday... You needed a lawyer 2 years ago.

 

[xylene]

I was told that

told by whom?

Anytime a poster mentions getting told something - pretty good clue nobody knows what is going on and they are at least halfway up a certain creek without a rowing implement.

 

[LdiJ]

What a mess. You didn't have an agreement that specified what would happen in the event of this INCREDIBLY COMMON contingency?

(y'all splitting up was something you SHOULD have planned as a possibility...)

You should consider to both abandon the project depending on what the agreement with your lender (your parents) exactly is.

I am not convinced she is owed a DIME by you and agreeing to repayment was another HUGE HUGE mistake.

It's called sunk costs. Why does she get to recover her sunk costs on a house that never got built from a person she doesn't want to be with?

Y'all need a lawyer yesterday... You needed a lawyer 2 years ago.

If she has legal right to the lot it would be a HUGE mistake not to agree to repay her.

 

[xylene]

If she has legal right to the lot it would be a HUGE mistake not to agree to repay her.

Please explain why the OP needs to repay interest paid on a construction loan that the co-borrowery has (presumably) defaulted on?

Why does his grilfriend get to stop making payments just because she 'wants out'? Explain that.

If anything, depending on what they exacly agreed to, she could be on the hook.

Hence why I pointed out the stupidity of agreeing to anything without involving a legal professional who has read their exact agreements.

 

[LdiJ]

Please explain why the OP needs to repay interest paid on a construction loan that the co-borrowery has (presumably) defaulted on?

Why does his grilfriend get to stop making payments just because she 'wants out'? Explain that.

If anything, depending on what they exacly agreed to, she could be on the hook.

Hence why I pointed out the stupidity of agreeing to anything without involving a legal professional who has read their exact agreements.

If she stays on the hook, she still co-owns the property. The OP doesn't want THAT.

 

[adjusterjack]

Please explain why the OP needs to repay interest paid on a construction loan that the co-borrowery has (presumably) defaulted on?

Why does his grilfriend get to stop making payments just because she 'wants out'? Explain that.

Because OP's parents are bankrolling this project with money they borrowed. The girlfriend has been voluntarily contributing to the project, perhaps in amounts that coincide with the parents' payments, but she is not a borrower nor does she have any contractual obligation to continue her contributions once she has left the relationship.

Hence why I pointed out the stupidity of agreeing to anything without involving a legal professional who has read their exact agreements.

There is nothing to indicate that there are any agreements to read. It's almost a foregone conclusion that nobody has anything in writing.

If she stays on the hook, she still co-owns the property.

We don't know yet if girlfriend is a deeded owner.

 

[xylene]

The girlfriend has been voluntarily contributing to the project,

Oh, so she has a right to insist on the money's return because it was voluntary?

Umm, ok.

She may really be owed some or all the money, honestly.

My point is it is very stupid for the OP to agree money is owed on her terms, potentially obliging him to money NOT owed to her without a professional lawyer advising and representing him and his interests.

I am firmly of the opinion that he should do everything to not pay anything not legally owed to the ex who abandoned the project, not pay her off out of "fairness"

 

[adjusterjack]

Oh, so she has a right to insist on the money's return because it was voluntary? Umm, ok.
She may really be owed some or all the money, honestly.

Which point are you referring to? Getting money back or discontinuing paying when the relationship is over?

If the former, there doesn't seem to be any doubt that the girlfriend's money was for purchasing an ownership interest in the home that they were building, whether she was on the deed or not. Being on the deed gives her leverage without the need of litigation. She just has to withhold her signature until the OP coughs up enough to satisfy her. Even without being on the deed, she still has an equitable interest in the property for which she should be paid if she no longer possesses the property. How much that is may be subject to litigation.

By the same token, if she's no longer enjoying possession, occupancy or potential equity, she no longer has to contribute.