Delaying the Divorce clock

[drysea]

Sonama County, California

Asking for a friend:

My ex-husband filed divorce and is trying to serve me the papers. I'm going out of the country in a few weeks to visit my sick mom. I don't want the divorce clock to start now. What are my options.

Can someone please help.

 

[CdwJava]

It appears that if she manages to avoid service, she can delay the clock.

Understand, however, that there are alternative methods of valid service that may not include personal service at all. So, if she's hoping to delay the inevitable, leaving the jurisdiction may not help.

__________________________________

From the CA Family Code:

2339.
(a) Subject to subdivision (b) and to Sections 2340 to 2344, inclusive, no judgment of dissolution is final for the purpose of terminating the marriage relationship of the parties until six months have expired from the date of service of a copy of summons and petition or the date of appearance of the respondent, whichever occurs first.

(b) The court may extend the six-month period described in subdivision (a) for good cause shown.

 

[drysea]

Thank you. Is there no way to request an extension or pause the proceedings temporarily ?

 

[CdwJava]

There probably is, but, doing so might count as the appearance required to set the time in motion.

Is she intending to be out of the country for 6 months or more? Does she want to contest the divorce? Keep in mind that she might only be delaying the inevitable since if he wants a divorce, he'll get one. And she can always hire an attorney to represent her interests in the proceedings if she desires.

Your friend should consult an attorney to get a grip on the legal options available to her in her unique circumstances.

 

[drysea]

Thanks for your response, much appreciate.

 

[adjusterjack]

Note that CA allows alternate methods of service, including service outside the US.

http://www.search-for-servers.com/process-server-tools/process-serving-laws/ca.htm

Avoiding personal service might not delay things by much.

 

[xylene]

An oblique but shockingly effective approach to delaying divorce: communication and reconciliation.

 

[eerelations]

An oblique but shockingly effective approach to delaying divorce: communication and reconciliation.

I think if STBX is already calling her husband an ex-husband, she's probably waaaay beyond reconciliation. And according to what SBTX's friend has said, the only reason STBX wants to delay the divorce is because she doesn't want to be served with court papers while she's away on vacation. Implied but not stated explicitly is that STBX is perfectly happy to be served said papers after she returns from said vacation.

 

[xylene]

STBX is perfectly happy to be served said papers after she returns from said vacation.

Whoa, what a concept, communicate that, in a positive and friendly way with the person they once wanted to share their life with, maybe even offering them some positive reinforcement...

"You know what we had dear, could you you wait til we can have the time to work this out when I get back from my trip. I've had it planned for years. Let's be conciliatory and have an amicable split."

Flippin' impossible terible advice especially for a third party who isn't involved...

 

[eerelations]

Whoa, what a concept, communicate that, in a positive and friendly way with the person they once wanted to share their life with, maybe even offering them some positive reinforcement...

"You know what we had dear, could you you wait til we can have the time to work this out when I get back from my trip. I've had it planned for years. Let's be conciliatory and have an amicable split."

Flippin' impossible terible advice especially for a third party who isn't involved...

Sorry if I offended you. I just meant that - according to the OP - communication and reconciliation seemed pretty impossible here.

 

[LdiJ]

Whoa, what a concept, communicate that, in a positive and friendly way with the person they once wanted to share their life with, maybe even offering them some positive reinforcement...

"You know what we had dear, could you you wait til we can have the time to work this out when I get back from my trip. I've had it planned for years. Let's be conciliatory and have an amicable split."

Flippin' impossible terible advice especially for a third party who isn't involved...

And some ex's would amicably agree and then the minute their stbx left the country they would pretend they couldn't be found, serve them by publication, and divorce them by default, and keep all of the marital assets. I also suspect that the trip is intended to be a bit longer than a couple of week's vacation.

Even the most normally amicable people can go a bit crazy when there is a divorce involved.

 

[xylene]

Sorry if I offended you. I just meant that - according to the OP - communication and reconciliation seemed pretty impossible here.

And some ex's would amicably agree and then the minute their stbx left the country they would pretend they couldn't be found, serve them by publication, and divorce them by default, and keep all of the marital assets. I also suspect that the trip is intended to be a bit longer than a couple of week's vacation.

Even the most normally amicable people can go a bit crazy when there is a divorce involved.

Then the OP's friend is a fool for leaving the country for an extended trip without a very good reason equivalent in value to what they would lose in a default divorce.

Stop the clock for a sick mom.

 

[drysea]

Thanks for your replies, yes my friend said, she did notify her husband earlier in 2nd week of December that she has to travel out of the country for 6 months and has it notarized, she said, he did agree for her leaving for 6 months for arrangement with child custody. She is surprised by the sudden move of filing the divorce end of the year and getting her served on 12/31. Is that because of any tax reasons her STBX is doing this? Also what is the consequence and she avoids getting served and leaves the country. Thanks for your help.

 

[LdiJ]

Thanks for your replies, yes my friend said, she did notify her husband earlier in 2nd week of December that she has to travel out of the country for 6 months and has it notarized, she said, he did agree for her leaving for 6 months for arrangement with child custody. She is surprised by the sudden move of filing the divorce end of the year and getting her served on 12/31. Is that because of any tax reasons her STBX is doing this? Also what is the consequence and she avoids getting served and leaves the country. Thanks for your help.

There would be no tax advantage. Your friend needs an attorney.

 

[stealth2]

Honestly? Your friend really needs to either create her own account and ask for herself, or she should consult with a local attorney.