Am I violating my visitation agreement?

[t74]

The decree was ordered in Texas. I am the mom and custodial parent.

Last night, my daughter had a father-daughter dance. When dad dropped her back off, I told him that I will be out of the state on his next visitation weekend, not this week's, but almost 3 weeks away.
I told him that if he wants to have them for his court-ordered time, he could pick them up from school. He claims that he can't because it is too early in the day and that I am in violation of our court order, which, from my understanding, says nothing about issues at the beginning of possession unless we Cannot take possession. Also, I understand that I am giving him much more than the required notice in order to adjust his potential schedule or ask someone else to pick them up. I will be putting it in writing today, per #8 below.

Here is the copied wording from our decree:

7. Inability to Exercise Possession – Each conservator is ORDERED to give
notice to the person in possession of the child on each occasion that the conservator will be
unable to exercise that conservator’s right of possession for any specified period. Such notice
must be received by the conservator in possession of the child at least four (4) hours prior to
the time the period of possession is scheduled to begin.
8. Written Notice – Written notice shall be deemed to have been timely made if
received or postmarked before or at the time that notice is due.
This concludes the Standard Possession Order.

We had an issue with the end of our last custodial switch, which is why he is saying this to me now.
It was Superbowl Sunday and he had agreed to tell me if he would be bringing them back early or on time. When I messaged him earlier that afternoon to see what he had decided, he said he never agreed to that, so I asked him to bring them at the ordered time. He refused. When I went to the location, he was not there at the court ordered time and I said I would alert the authorities if I did not have them within 2 hours. He showed up 1 hour later.

I only resorted to this because I have tried to be as fair and accommodating as possible, which he has acknowledged, and he always finds a way to back out of the agreement so I have to do all of the driving and pay for all of the fuel.

I am not trying to bad mouth him, only going on proven events. He is employed, but $40,000 behind in child support and the OAG will not do anything except send him a letter. He is supposed to pay for their medical insurance and have life insurance on himself, neither of which has happened in the 5 years since the order.

Am I in violation or should I be handling this a different way?

Thank you for any responses.

Authorities? The police? for a civil matter?

 

[t74]

I live with my fiance, his mother gets them ready for school and watches them afterward. Dad does not have our address per my fear of property damage he has caused in the past, not that I could legally prove, so no protective/restraining order.
Fiance's mom does not have a vehicle big enough to carry all 4 of our combined children to a meeting place or dad's house. My fiance will not meet with him because dad has threatened to physically harm him, which wouldn't happen, but it's better not start something.

Dad does not know where his children are living? Are you kidding?

 

[LdiJ]

Authorities? The police? for a civil matter?

Texas does have custodial interference laws on the books, so it can be a criminal matter in TX.

 

[t74]

Whether she can the question is whether she should. Imagine the harm to the child if dad is arrested when child is present.

Based on mom's threat, dad would be foolish to do anything but obey the orders to the letter. He could pick the child up at school as requested by mom and have her call the authorities on him for doing so. Mom wants him to follow the orders except when it suits her.

Both need to step back and stop being so childish.

 

[LdiJ]

Whether she can the question is whether she should. Imagine the harm to the child if dad is arrested when child is present.

Based on mom's threat, dad would be foolish to do anything but obey the orders to the letter. He could pick the child up at school as requested by mom and have her call the authorities on him for doing so. Mom wants him to follow the orders except when it suits her.

Both need to step back and stop being so childish.

That is a ridiculous thing to say. You are comparing apples and oranges. There is a huge difference between a parent voluntarily allowing/suggesting an early pickup and a parent flat out refusing to return children.

 

[PayrollHRGuy]

That is a ridiculous thing to say. You are comparing apples and oranges. There is a huge difference between a parent voluntarily allowing/suggesting an early pickup and a parent flat out refusing to return children.

And how would the father prove the mother called and asked him to pick the child up at school if the mother said otherwise?

 

[LdiJ]

And how would the father prove the mother called and asked him to pick the child up at school if the mother said otherwise?

Mom said she was putting it in writing.

 

[Ohiogal]

That is a ridiculous thing to say. You are comparing apples and oranges. There is a huge difference between a parent voluntarily allowing/suggesting an early pickup and a parent flat out refusing to return children.

Dad didn't refuse to return the children and actually did.