Reasonable notice of travel with Child

[Polkadot78]

Massachusetts

Hello- In our custody agreement, it states father will provide mother with reasonable notice of travel plans concerning the child. He stated today that he is taking our son to Florida for a few days this coming Saturday, giving me 3 days notice. I don't think this is reasonable at all. My son is with me most of the time, his father sees him 5-6 days a month (just for some background). Can I please get some advise on how to handle this situation? We have this in our custody agreement for a reason. He is a pilot, and has the ability to go on trips often, but that is why we have this in our agreement, so he doesn't just assume he can take off with him at any time.

Thank you in advance.

 

[Zigner]

Massachusetts

Hello- In our custody agreement, it states father will provide mother with reasonable notice of travel plans concerning the child. He stated today that he is taking our son to Florida for a few days this coming Saturday, giving me 3 days notice. I don't think this is reasonable at all. My son is with me most of the time, his father sees him 5-6 days a month (just for some background). Can I please get some advise on how to handle this situation? We have this in our custody agreement for a reason. He is a pilot, and has the ability to go on trips often, but that is why we have this in our agreement, so he doesn't just assume he can take off with him at any time.

Thank you in advance.

How should you handle this? Make sure your mutual child packs appropriately for a few days in Florida and give him hugs and kisses before sending him off with his dad.

SMH

 

[LdiJ]

Massachusetts

Hello- In our custody agreement, it states father will provide mother with reasonable notice of travel plans concerning the child. He stated today that he is taking our son to Florida for a few days this coming Saturday, giving me 3 days notice. I don't think this is reasonable at all. My son is with me most of the time, his father sees him 5-6 days a month (just for some background). Can I please get some advise on how to handle this situation? We have this in our custody agreement for a reason. He is a pilot, and has the ability to go on trips often, but that is why we have this in our agreement, so he doesn't just assume he can take off with him at any time.

Thank you in advance.

Whose parenting time would dad be using for the trip? Is it his scheduled time or yours? What is your regular parenting schedule. How old is the child?

 

[Zigner]

Whose parenting time would dad be using for the trip? Is it his scheduled time or yours? What is your regular parenting schedule.

I will admit that I made assumptions that dad was taking kiddo entirely on dad's time. That may have been too much of a leap... (we'll see).

 

[Polkadot78]

It’s his parenting time, the child is 6. We have a custody modification in 2 weeks because he cancels last minute on his son at least 4-5 days a month, just for some more background. But why even have in our custody agreement reasonable time, if that’s not the case. It’s there for a reason, no?

 

[Zigner]

It’s his parenting time, the child is 6. We have a custody modification in 2 weeks because he cancels last minute on his son at least 4-5 days a month, just for some more background. But why even have in our custody agreement reasonable time, if that’s not the case. It’s there for a reason, no?

Notification today for a trip for a 6 year old child to take with dad and on dad's time this weekend is perfectly reasonable.

 

[not2cleverRed]

It’s his parenting time, the child is 6. We have a custody modification in 2 weeks because he cancels last minute on his son at least 4-5 days a month, just for some more background. But why even have in our custody agreement reasonable time, if that’s not the case. It’s there for a reason, no?

It's his parenting time, and your son won't be missing school.

Could he have given you more time to plan? Yes. But this is not a hill to die on.

You have not even been able to articulate a reason, other than you don't think you've been given enough notice.

 

[Polkadot78]

Then I guess what I’m really asking is, why is it even in the custody agreement?? It’s obviously there for a reason. Can someone please answer that question?

 

[stealth2]

Why do you consider it unreasonable notice?

I suspect the spirit of the wording in the agreement involves trips that might impact the other parent's time or school attendance. Would you have a problem if Dad told you he was taking kiddo skiing to VT for the weekend?

 

[not2cleverRed]

Then I guess what I’m really asking is, why is it even in the custody agreement?? It’s obviously there for a reason. Can someone please answer that question?

It is just a vaguely worded statement implying that parents should extend common courtesy to each other.

If you want it clarified, you can ask that it be clarified. You can split hairs about exactly how many days notice should be given for trips depending on whether out of county, into adjacent state, over 100 miles, over 1000 miles, out of the country. But, if you come across as controlling (you kind of are) this will backfire.

Do you think Dad is a danger to his son? Do you think Dad is irresponsible and going to allow his son be harmed during his parenting time?

 

[stealth2]

BTW.... p/x

 

[LdiJ]

I will admit that I made assumptions that dad was taking kiddo entirely on dad's time. That may have been too much of a leap... (we'll see).

Notification today for a trip for a 6 year old child to take with dad and on dad's time this weekend is perfectly reasonable.

Maybe… Mom did say "a few days". A six year old is likely in school. If the trip starts on Saturday and is a "few days", it might not be perfectly reasonable. I am not saying that it isn't, I am just saying that its not a flat out given.

 

[t74]

Monday could be a school holiday in child's district.

I think mom is jealous because child is going to better weather and she would like to be going too.

Also, mom, do you notify dad of all your travel plans? If not, why not?

 

[stealth2]

Maybe… Mom did say "a few days". A six year old is likely in school. If the trip starts on Saturday and is a "few days", it might not be perfectly reasonable. I am not saying that it isn't, I am just saying that its not a flat out given.

OP clarified that it is Dad's parenting time.

 

[stealth2]

his father sees him 5-6 days a month (just for some background).

Please see past posts where 5-6 is 6-9. OP - consistency breeds credibility.