Is this verbal assault?

[WAPatriot]

What is the name of your state? Washington

My son was dating a woman. At one point he was introduced to her brother, who is in the armed forces. The brother looked at him very threateningly and said "If you hurt my sister I will kill you." According to my son, he was not joking. This was the only interaction they had, and it caused my son considerable distress.

My son just broke up with the girl. Should he take any action like file a police report? How can he go on record about this threat?

 

[PayrollHRGuy]

No

 

[xylene]

Is your son a minor?

If not, you are waaaaaayy to involved in his life.

This is a stupid masculine trope, and you AND he need to let it go.

Bluntly - your son is a...

 

[quincy]

What is the name of your state? Washington

My son was dating a woman. At one point he was introduced to her brother, who is in the armed forces. The brother looked at him very threateningly and said "If you hurt my sister I will kill you." According to my son, he was not joking. This was the only interaction they had, and it caused my son considerable distress.

My son just broke up with the girl. Should he take any action like file a police report? How can he go on record about this threat?

Your son probably should forget about it. It sounds like the woman's brother was making an idle threat. And I assume your son did not hurt the woman he was dating.

Here is a link to Washington's law on verbal threats:
https://apps.leg.wa.gov/WAC/default.aspx?cite=132Q-10-215
If at any time your son fears for his life or safety, however, he should call the police.

 

[NeilTheCop]

Perhaps your son should consider a career in the military himself, then he won't need to run home to mummy every time he feels threatened by a bad man.

 

[pac72]

the boy has no kahunas..verbal assault ??? call the police cause he got scared ???

 

[quincy]

WAPatriot might be dad, not mom.

And we don't know the son's age or how threatening or intimidating the brother of the woman was.

But it does not sound like the son has anything to worry about. Had he been really concerned, he probably would have contacted the police soon after the threat was made.

 

[not2cleverRed]

Perhaps your son should consider a career in the military himself, then he won't need to run home to mummy every time he feels threatened by a bad man.

But then the username wouldn't be so ironic.

 

[commentator]

Some fathers, and or brothers feel the need to make such a threat to anyone who's dating their daughter/sister, whatever. It's a totally stupid bit of macho posturing that happens in some cultures (such as mine.) It is also totally unhelpful, even hinders any possible good they were trying to do by letting the young man know they feel protective toward their female relative. Because, as I heard a woman tell my bragging posturing former military co-worker who'd said if his son in law ever raised a hand against his daughter, he'd kill him, etc.

She said, "Sir, I was in an abusive relationship at one time, and I'll just tell you. If your son in law ever hurts your daughter, you'll be the last person on God's green earth she will let find out about it!"

It's the same thing that goes on with sexual abuse, "I could never tell my Dad or he will kill him and have to go to jail!" Dad or brother may think they're being helpful in these situations by making this sort of commentary but they're really not.

In reality, if your son did hurt his ex-girlfriend, he's got plenty to worry about anyhow. He needs to be seeking counseling.

If it's just that he thinks she's going to tell her brother he hurt her when he didn't, in order to get him killed or maimed for her own satisfaction, he needs to watch his back and move on quickly to end the drama. Either way, there is no way to "go on record about the threat now." I understand that may be what he's trying to do, or you think that might be a good idea to do. But probably, nothing will come of it. If it does, you can certainly tell them about it then. Until something actually happens, no one will be interested.

 

[NeilTheCop]

Read the comments while listening.
[Link removed]

 

[Shadowbunny]

Some fathers, and or brothers feel the need to make such a threat to anyone who's dating their daughter/sister, whatever. It's a totally stupid bit of macho posturing that happens in some cultures (such as mine.) ...

This. So much this. Let me guess: the parties involved are in their late teens or 20s. Truly, I heard this SO many times from my older, male cousins. It means nothing. And it's a little odd that you'd think this was serious enough to call the police.

 

[LdiJ]

This. So much this. Let me guess: the parties involved are in their late teens or 20s. Truly, I heard this SO many times from my older, male cousins. It means nothing. And it's a little odd that you'd think this was serious enough to call the police.

I am not so sure that someone who is not part of that kind of culture wouldn't be a bit freaked out by that kind of threat. I do agree with you. I do agree that its not an unusual threat that gets made. I just understand how it can freak out some people.