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Sole Legal Custody In Exchange for Eliminating Child Support

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Aubreeworth

New member
What is the name of your state? CA

Soon I will be getting my child’s bio father to sign paperwork giving me sole legal custody in exchange for closing the child support order currently against him.
I currently have my son full time and have since birth, but there are no legal documents linked with my custody of him. This will be a win win where his bio dad will be happy not having to pay child support and I will be happy to have sole legal custody.
My question is- What stipulations do I need to be sure to include that makes me the sole decision maker in my sons life until he becomes an adult? I do not ever want to contact his father again after this paperwork goes through. Things like passports and permission to attend different schools or leave the country I want to be my decision alone. I just want to be sure that I stipulate all of this in the signed agreement to ensure that we can sever our communication after the paperwork is complete. Are there any important items that I need to be sure to add to stipulations on the legal document to be sure that I will not have to contact the bio dad in the future for signatures or allowances by him? I’m trying to think of everything, but I do not know all the scenarios that may arise that require both parents permission for. Any advise is very appreciated!
 


stealth2

Under the Radar Member
What is the name of your state? CA

Soon I will be getting my child’s bio father to sign paperwork giving me sole legal custody in exchange for closing the child support order currently against him.
I currently have my son full time and have since birth, but there are no legal documents linked with my custody of him. This will be a win win where his bio dad will be happy not having to pay child support and I will be happy to have sole legal custody.
My question is- What stipulations do I need to be sure to include that makes me the sole decision maker in my sons life until he becomes an adult? I do not ever want to contact his father again after this paperwork goes through. Things like passports and permission to attend different schools or leave the country I want to be my decision alone. I just want to be sure that I stipulate all of this in the signed agreement to ensure that we can sever our communication after the paperwork is complete. Are there any important items that I need to be sure to add to stipulations on the legal document to be sure that I will not have to contact the bio dad in the future for signatures or allowances by him? I’m trying to think of everything, but I do not know all the scenarios that may arise that require both parents permission for. Any advise is very appreciated!
LOL It doesn't work that way. A court will not sign off on a permanent end to child support for a minor child. And how will Dad's parenting time work? I suggest you speak with a lawyer.
 

Zigner

Senior Member, Non-Attorney
Absent a total termination of rights of the parent, there is nothing "permanent" about a child support or custody order.
 

Just Blue

Senior Member
What is the name of your state? CA

Soon I will be getting my child’s bio father to sign paperwork giving me sole legal custody in exchange for closing the child support order currently against him.
I currently have my son full time and have since birth, but there are no legal documents linked with my custody of him. This will be a win win where his bio dad will be happy not having to pay child support and I will be happy to have sole legal custody.
My question is- What stipulations do I need to be sure to include that makes me the sole decision maker in my sons life until he becomes an adult? I do not ever want to contact his father again after this paperwork goes through. Things like passports and permission to attend different schools or leave the country I want to be my decision alone. I just want to be sure that I stipulate all of this in the signed agreement to ensure that we can sever our communication after the paperwork is complete. Are there any important items that I need to be sure to add to stipulations on the legal document to be sure that I will not have to contact the bio dad in the future for signatures or allowances by him? I’m trying to think of everything, but I do not know all the scenarios that may arise that require both parents permission for. Any advise is very appreciated!
How old is the child? Have you been on any type of state aide? Why are you so determined that Dad not be a part of his childs life?
 

Eekamouse

Senior Member
What is the name of your state? CA

Soon I will be getting my child’s bio father to sign paperwork giving me sole legal custody in exchange for closing the child support order currently against him.
I currently have my son full time and have since birth, but there are no legal documents linked with my custody of him. This will be a win win where his bio dad will be happy not having to pay child support and I will be happy to have sole legal custody.
My question is- What stipulations do I need to be sure to include that makes me the sole decision maker in my sons life until he becomes an adult? I do not ever want to contact his father again after this paperwork goes through. Things like passports and permission to attend different schools or leave the country I want to be my decision alone. I just want to be sure that I stipulate all of this in the signed agreement to ensure that we can sever our communication after the paperwork is complete. Are there any important items that I need to be sure to add to stipulations on the legal document to be sure that I will not have to contact the bio dad in the future for signatures or allowances by him? I’m trying to think of everything, but I do not know all the scenarios that may arise that require both parents permission for. Any advise is very appreciated!
What makes you think a judge would allow you to do this? What give you the right to deny your child his/her father? You aren't God,
 

LdiJ

Senior Member
Guys and Gals, I get the impression that dad is already not involved at all. So mom probably isn't denying her child anything.

Now, as far as child support is concerned, the court will not allow mom to say no to child support if the child is receiving any kind of state benefits such as food stamps, Medicaid, Section 8 housing etc. A court is also going to look askance if the court sees an agreement for sole custody in exchange for no child support, because it smacks of selling his child.

However they could stipulate sole custody for mom and no parenting time for dad. They could also stipulate no child support. However, it will not be enforceable long term if either of them change their mind.
 

Zigner

Senior Member, Non-Attorney
However they could stipulate sole custody for mom and no parenting time for dad. They could also stipulate no child support.
I'd like to point out that the judge can also override this type of stipulation if s/he feels it is inappropriate.
 

LdiJ

Senior Member
I'd like to point out that the judge can also override this type of stipulation if s/he feels it is inappropriate.
Yes, a judge could and some would. If mom is actually well off enough that she does not need child support she can also argue that point.
 
Short of termination of dad's parental rights, or the child is adopted by either your spouse, or by another family, dad will have the right to come back and ask to parenting time. He has the right to request time with his child, and barring any thing horrible, a family court will likely grant it. And quite possibly joint custody. And you will have the right to request child support of the dad as long as he is the legal parent, and the state has the right to demand child support from the father, should you need to rely on any state aid to raise your child.
 

Zigner

Senior Member, Non-Attorney
Short of termination of dad's parental rights, or the child is adopted by either your spouse, or by another family, dad will have the right to come back and ask to parenting time. He has the right to request time with his child, and barring any thing horrible, a family court will likely grant it. And quite possibly joint custody. And you will have the right to request child support of the dad as long as he is the legal parent, and the state has the right to demand child support from the father, should you need to rely on any state aid to raise your child.
Great summary of information already presented.
 

LdiJ

Senior Member
I get the impression that this is not going through court.
Mom wants to be able to get a passport for the child and other things without dad's permission, so if its not going through court then mom won't get what she wants.
 

Aubreeworth

New member
Absent a total termination of rights of the parent, there is nothing "permanent" about a child support or custody order.
I am aware of that. The father has very clearly established that he does not and will not ever be a part of his child's life though and I believe this to be true wholeheartedly. I know that of course things could change in years to come, but it is unlikely that he'd ever request visitation in the future, so in my mind, once the paperwork goes through and I am awarded sole legal custody, I won't have to stress about it anymore.
 

Aubreeworth

New member
Short of termination of dad's parental rights, or the child is adopted by either your spouse, or by another family, dad will have the right to come back and ask to parenting time. He has the right to request time with his child, and barring any thing horrible, a family court will likely grant it. And quite possibly joint custody. And you will have the right to request child support of the dad as long as he is the legal parent, and the state has the right to demand child support from the father, should you need to rely on any state aid to raise your child.
I absolutely understand that and perhaps I wasn't clear in my question. I am aware that he has the right to request visitation or a change in custody order until my child is 18, but I am not at all concerned about that considering he has zero interest in his child's life and has made it clear that he never will. My question is about the paperwork- if I fill out the paperwork for sole legal custody, will that include everything I'd ever need to make decisions for in regards to my child. Will I have all the legal power to make these decisions without having to interact with his bio dad?
 

LdiJ

Senior Member
I absolutely understand that and perhaps I wasn't clear in my question. I am aware that he has the right to request visitation or a change in custody order until my child is 18, but I am not at all concerned about that considering he has zero interest in his child's life and has made it clear that he never will. My question is about the paperwork- if I fill out the paperwork for sole legal custody, will that include everything I'd ever need to make decisions for in regards to my child. Will I have all the legal power to make these decisions without having to interact with his bio dad?
If you have sole custody, that mean that you can make all decisions regarding your child without any input from dad. You should however state it as sole legal and physical custody.
 

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