Future Parental Custody Plan

[Bells56]

What is the name of your state? California
Hi all,
I apologize in advance for the long post. I had a question about making future custodial plans for my child, when and if I were to suddenly pass. To give backstory, I did have a restraining order against my child's father and was granted sole legal and physical custody. It has since expired (the r.o.) but the custody has remained the same. My mother, my child's biological grandmother, and I both decided that if something were to happen to me (if I died, or gotten sick, etc.), she'd take care of my child. Unfortunately however, she recently passed suddenly and now I have worries about what would happen to my child now. I guess my question is, is there a 'way', for lack of a better term, to legally appoint someone else to be granted legal guardian of my child after I pass? I know that the father would have to be notified because he still legally does have rights. But since I have full legal and physical custody, am I still able to appoint someone else to take care of my child? Now I say legal guardian because the person I want appointed to be the one to be given custody is not a blood relative but my brother's child's mother. So my nephew's mother. Is there a process where I can do this? I did try to word my question as best as I could and if there are any questions I'll gladly answer them. Thanks you!

 

[stealth2]

You could appoint someone as a "stand-by guardian, but the father would have every right to claim custody in the event you pass.

My condolences on the loss of your mother.

 

[LdiJ]

You could appoint someone as a "stand-vy guardian, but the father would have every right to claim custody in the event you pass.

My condolences on the loss of your mother.

I think that you meant stand-by. Just to clarify, dad would have to go to court to try to claim custody in this scenario.

 

[stealth2]

I think that you meant stand-by. Just to clarify, dad would have to go to court to try to claim custody in this scenario.

I did, Thank you. Corrected it - fat fingers/bleary eyes.

 

[Zigner]

Just to clarify, dad would have to go to court to try to claim custody in this scenario.

Why?

 

[Zigner]

What is the name of your state? California
Hi all,
I apologize in advance for the long post.

I just wanted to say that your post was definitely not "long" and was very well put together for its purpose.

I, too, offer condolences on the passing of your mother.

 

[LdiJ]

Why?

Because mom has the unusual situation of having sole legal and physical custody. It sounds like dad may even be a stranger to the child.

 

[Zigner]

Because mom has the unusual situation of having sole legal and physical custody. It sounds like dad may even be a stranger to the child.

That does not mean that dad has lost his parental rights.

I am saying that it is not an absolute, as you stated. It's not necessarily true that "... dad would have to go to court to try to claim custody in this scenario". It's quite possible that dad would end up in court at some point, but it's not a necessary step. If dad asserts his rights, and if the nominated "guardian" doesn't force dad to go to court to do so, then there is no court involvement required.

 

[zddoodah]

is there a 'way', for lack of a better term, to legally appoint someone else to be granted legal guardian of my child after I pass?

No. You can make a will that states, if you die before your child becomes an adult, you would like the court to appoint so-and-so as guardian of the child's person and estate. However, that's nothing more than a statement of preference. A court might give consideration to such a stated preference, but the surviving parent's rights will trump that in almost every case.

since I have full legal and physical custody, am I still able to appoint someone else to take care of my child?

Just to clarify (since there's some incorrect information in this thread), you cannot appoint anyone as it relates to custody or guardianship of your child after you die. Only the court can appoint a guardian. If you die before your child becomes an adult, the father will automatically have all rights of custody (no different than if you and the father were married and you died). The father would not need to take any legal action to make this happen. Your mother could take legal action, but it would be extremely difficult to divest the father of his rights as a parent.

am saying that it is not an absolute, as you stated. It's not necessarily true that "... dad would have to go to court to try to claim custody in this scenario". It's quite possible that dad would end up in court at some point, but it's not a necessary step. If dad asserts his rights, and if the nominated "guardian" doesn't force dad to go to court to do so, then there is no court involvement required.

This is correct. That M has "sole legal and physical custody" does not mean anything as concerns F's rights upon M's death if the child is still a minor. Unless a court has stripped F of his parental rights, he has all legal rights regarding the minor child upon M's death. If some other person seeks to keep the child from F in this situation, that person is arguably committing a crime.

 

[stealth2]

Just to clarify (since there's some incorrect information in this thread), you cannot appoint anyone as it relates to custody or guardianship of your child after you die. Only the court can appoint a guardian.

Verbiage, of course, varies.
Appoint, for example:

Synonyms for appoint

• assign
• choose
• designate
• elect
• establish
• install
• name
• nominate
• select
• set
• accredit
• allot
• command
• commission
• decree
• delegate
• determine
• direct
• enjoin
• finger
• fix
• ordain
• settle
• tap

We SOMETIMES deal with colloquialisms, @zddoodah.

 

[LdiJ]

That does not mean that dad has lost his parental rights.

I am saying that it is not an absolute, as you stated. It's not necessarily true that "... dad would have to go to court to try to claim custody in this scenario". It's quite possible that dad would end up in court at some point, but it's not a necessary step. If dad asserts his rights, and if the nominated "guardian" doesn't force dad to go to court to do so, then there is no court involvement required.

Sure, if the nominated guardian simply hands the child over to dad, he would not have to go to court. However, in all reality the nominated guardian is highly unlikely to do that. This is a case where dad, by court order, has no legal or physical custody of the child, therefore I see it as a necessary step. I would never hand a child over to a stranger who just pops up out of the blue and says "I am dad, hand her over". I doubt that the police would try to assist dad at all in this scenario either. They would tell him to take it to court.

 

[Zigner]

Sure, if the nominated guardian simply hands the child over to dad, he would not have to go to court. However, in all reality the nominated guardian is highly unlikely to do that. This is a case where dad, by court order, has no legal or physical custody of the child, therefore I see it as a necessary step. I would never hand a child over to a stranger who just pops up out of the blue and says "I am dad, hand her over". I doubt that the police would try to assist dad at all in this scenario either. They would tell him to take it to court.

You've got the crystal ball!