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Question about giving back a loaner vehicle back to parent I must cut ties with

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PeterEugene

New member
Okay, I go to college away from my hometown, and am an adult. I deal with toxic parents and am close to cutting ties with them. Problem is, one of them loaned me a vehicle to use.

I must give it back to the person, it is in his name. But I'm wondering if shipping the car back to his home using one of those vehicle-shipping services counts as "giving it back" in the eyes of civil law, or do I have to physically drive to his house to give it to them (otherwise have him charge me with unauthorized/wrongful use - if he got so egotistical)? I just cringe at even having to look at this person physically.

If I were to file some kind of No Contact form or Restraining Order before this vehicle issue is taken care of, how would I give it back to him?

I'm in Indiana.
 


Just Blue

Senior Member
Okay, I go to college away from my hometown, and am an adult. I deal with toxic parents and am close to cutting ties with them. Problem is, one of them loaned me a vehicle to use.

I must give it back to the person, it is in his name. But I'm wondering if shipping the car back to his home using one of those vehicle-shipping services counts as "giving it back" in the eyes of civil law, or do I have to physically drive to his house to give it to them (otherwise have him charge me with unauthorized/wrongful use - if he got so egotistical)? I just cringe at even having to look at this person physically.

If I were to file some kind of No Contact form or Restraining Order before this vehicle issue is taken care of, how would I give it back to him?

I'm in Indiana.
You can ship the car..make sure you insure it and get a signed receipt ...also make sure the car is in the same condition as when that toxic, nasty person loaned it to you. What grounds do you think you have for a restraining order?
 

PeterEugene

New member
You can ship the car..make sure you insure it and get a signed receipt ...also make sure the car is in the same condition as when that toxic, nasty person loaned it to you. What grounds do you think you have for a restraining order?
Thank you. As for the RO, well, he's "toxic and nasty", I'll leave it at that.
 

zddoodah

Active Member
I must give it back to the person, it is in his name. But I'm wondering if shipping the car back to his home using one of those vehicle-shipping services counts as "giving it back" in the eyes of civil law, or do I have to physically drive to his house to give it to them (otherwise have him charge me with unauthorized/wrongful use - if he got so egotistical)?
As I think I told you last week on another site in response to this same inquiry, "giving it back" is not a term that has any legal meaning. I'm not really sure why you think it would make a difference whether you return possession of the vehicle yourself or by some other means, but it doesn't (except that hiring a vehicle shipping service will probably cost you a heck of a lot more money than doing it yourself, and you won't be able to verify for yourself that the car was delivered in the same condition as when you parted with it).

If I were to file some kind of No Contact form or Restraining Order before this vehicle issue is taken care of, how would I give it back to him?
That's kind of a pointless hypothetical unless you have some legal or factual basis for seeking a restraining order. Your subjective opinion that your father is "toxic" and "egotistical" and "nasty" is not a basis for a restraining order.
 

quincy

Senior Member
PeterEugene, you say you are in Indiana. Where does the parent who loaned you the car live?

If you didn’t ship the car back to your parent (perhaps because of the expense involved in doing so) and you decided to drive the car to your parent’s house instead, by what means would you return to Indiana?

I can understand that you have a toxic relationship with your parents but most college students are not all that wealthy. I think you might want to weigh carefully the costs of shipping the car against the costs of driving it to your parents’ house.
 

LdiJ

Senior Member
Okay, I go to college away from my hometown, and am an adult. I deal with toxic parents and am close to cutting ties with them. Problem is, one of them loaned me a vehicle to use.

I must give it back to the person, it is in his name. But I'm wondering if shipping the car back to his home using one of those vehicle-shipping services counts as "giving it back" in the eyes of civil law, or do I have to physically drive to his house to give it to them (otherwise have him charge me with unauthorized/wrongful use - if he got so egotistical)? I just cringe at even having to look at this person physically.

If I were to file some kind of No Contact form or Restraining Order before this vehicle issue is taken care of, how would I give it back to him?

I'm in Indiana.
Where is he? I might be tempted to mail him the keys (registered mail, return receipt) and include the location of the car in the package and let him retrieve his car.

However, that might not be the smartest thing to do. Certainly shipping it back to him would be counted as giving it back. You don't have to personally drive it back.
 

quincy

Senior Member
Where is he? I might be tempted to mail him the keys (registered mail, return receipt) and include the location of the car in the package and let him retrieve his car.

However, that might not be the smartest thing to do. Certainly shipping it back to him would be counted as giving it back. You don't have to personally drive it back.
Mailing car keys with the location of the car would not be the smartest move. BUT you could volunteer (for a price) to pick up Peter’s car and drive it to the toxic parents for him. Road trip! :)
 

PeterEugene

New member
PeterEugene, you say you are in Indiana. Where does the parent who loaned you the car live?

If you didn’t ship the car back to your parent (perhaps because of the expense involved in doing so) and you decided to drive the car to your parent’s house instead, by what means would you return to Indiana?

I can understand that you have a toxic relationship with your parents but most college students are not all that wealthy. I think you might want to weigh carefully the costs of shipping the car against the costs of driving it to your parents’ house.
This parent also lives in Indiana, we're just in 2 different cities across the state. I live in a city where they got all sorts of Uber/Lyft ridesharing, moving and storage services, as well as bus services, so getting around town or moving in between apartments is sorta the least of my worries.
 

PeterEugene

New member
As I think I told you last week on another site in response to this same inquiry, "giving it back" is not a term that has any legal meaning. I'm not really sure why you think it would make a difference whether you return possession of the vehicle yourself or by some other means, but it doesn't (except that hiring a vehicle shipping service will probably cost you a heck of a lot more money than doing it yourself, and you won't be able to verify for yourself that the car was delivered in the same condition as when you parted with it).
The reason why I inquire about any possible legal definitions of "giving it back" is because when I asking my police department questions about legal separations enforcement and etc., I brought up the issue of the car, and the person told me I'd have to give it back to him, and he was like, "You have to drive to your parents' place, and give it back or they can charge you with unauthorized use".

As to why I even considered using a car-shipping service, I guess it was more-so me wanting to avoid this parent at all costs.
 

stealth2

Under the Radar Member
Is it safe to assume you are covering all expenses (including tuition) w/o your parent's assistance (and that includes signatures on FAFSA forms)?
 

quincy

Senior Member
The reason why I inquire about any possible legal definitions of "giving it back" is because when I asking my police department questions about legal separations enforcement and etc., I brought up the issue of the car, and the person told me I'd have to give it back to him, and he was like, "You have to drive to your parents' place, and give it back or they can charge you with unauthorized use".

As to why I even considered using a car-shipping service, I guess it was more-so me wanting to avoid this parent at all costs.
The police were probably referring to the problem with insurance on the vehicle if an unauthorized person were to drive it.

Although I can understand your reluctance to interact with parents you find toxic, a simple car drop off sounds to me to be the simplest and best solution. Just have an Uber waiting for you at the house, do a fast key handoff to your parent, hop in the Uber and take off, before problems can erupt.
 

Just Blue

Senior Member
The police were probably referring to the problem with insurance on the vehicle if an unauthorized person were to drive it.

Although I can understand your reluctance to interact with parents you find toxic, a simple car drop off sounds to me to be the simplest and best solution. Just have an Uber waiting for you at the house, do a fast key handoff to your parent, hop in the Uber and take off, before problems can erupt.
I agree. Also Peter, remember to say thank you for the use of the car. :)
 

zddoodah

Active Member
when I asking my police department questions about legal separations enforcement and etc., I brought up the issue of the car, and the person told me I'd have to give it back to him, and he was like, "You have to drive to your parents' place, and give it back or they can charge you with unauthorized use".
Never take legal advice from a police officer. Cops might know criminal law, but they typically know nothing about the civil side of things. Also, what does "legal separations enforcement and etc." mean?
 

quincy

Senior Member
I have a couple of questions, Peter, mostly because I only now noticed the placement of your thread in the “Divorce, Separation, and Annulment” section of the forum:

Are your parents in the process of divorce? If so, is the car you are currently driving part of your parents’ property division dispute or agreement?

The answers (probably) won’t change my previous advice. I am just curious.
 

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