Want to know my options

[Eccentrica_Gallumbits]

The first thing that the two of you have to understand is that, if you don't reach an agreement, you'll have to sell the house.

My math is based on selling the house for $830,000.

You'll pay 6% commission ($51,000) leaving $781,000.

You get your $200,000 back from the loan payoff. He gets his $60,000 back from the loan payoff.

That leaves $501,000.

He gets $60,000 back for his down payment. You get $12,000 back from your down payment.

That leaves $429,000.

You get $38,000 that you paid into the principle. He gets $20,000 that he paid into the principle.

That leaves $371,000.

Divide that in half and you owe him $185,500

At 3% interest with a 30 year amortization your P and I would be $782 per month.

In your mortgage contract you could agree to sell or refinance after the kids are grown. At 5 years your balance would be $165,000. At 10 years $141,000. Shouldn't be too hard for you to refinance that amount.

If he won't go along with the adjustment for the commission and you don't want to risk having to sell the house, add the $51,000 to the $371,000 and you get $422,000. Divide that in half and you owe him $221,000. $932 per month. Balance at 5 years $196,400. At 10 years $168,000.

If you want to calculate 2%, use this amortization calculator.

Mortgage/Loan Calculator with Amortization Schedule (bretwhissel.net)

Thank you. That's so much better. I really don't know where he got that I would owe him 350k after paying for 64% of the house.

One silver lining to NOT being married appears to be that the courts can't easily force a sale if we can't agree, like they could during a divorce. Apparently, he'd have to lawyer up and sue me to force this to happen, and it can get *quite* expensive.

Is there any way to prevent that calculator in the link you shared from automatically including a balloon payment?

 

[adjusterjack]

Apparently, he'd have to lawyer up and sue me to force this to happen, and it can get *quite* expensive.

He's got his mother's wealth, right?

Is there any way to prevent that calculator in the link you shared from automatically including a balloon payment?

What figures did you put in that got you a balloon payment?

 

[Eccentrica_Gallumbits]

He's got his mother's wealth, right?

That's my ex husband, the father of my kids, who is the trustafarian with a wealthy mom. He's vindictive. This guy isn't, plus the money he's dealing with is his own. He'd likely avoid a pricey legal battle if at all possible.

What figures did you put in that got you a balloon payment?

On the calculator, I think I was playing with something like 200,000 at 3% over 30 years. No matter what, it would throw out a low monthly amount with a large balloon payment.

 

[adjusterjack]

On the calculator, I think I was playing with something like 200,000 at 3% over 30 years. No matter what, it would throw out a low monthly amount with a large balloon payment.

Using those figures I come up with a payment of $843.21 and no balloon payment.

 

[Eccentrica_Gallumbits]

Using those figures I come up with a payment of $843.21 and no balloon payment.

Weird! First time, it did that. Then when playing with the numbers (number of months, percentage, etc.) it insisted on a balloon payment from there on out.

 

[adjusterjack]

You may have left something in a box that should have been left blank. Each time you change the parameters you have to remove the monthly payment so it can be recalculated.

 

[Eccentrica_Gallumbits]

I'm REALLY trying to get legal help with this but getting the run-around. Family lawyers tell me it's a real estate law issue. They tell me it's a family law issue or that a realtor should be able to help me. They refer me to a real estate lawyer. Any advice?

The latest is that we let the current low-interest loan ride until rates come down and I refinance. I pay him some chunk toward his share of the equity soon when my inheritance comes in, and we agree to a later payoff of the balance when the home sells. But the amount is so hard to determine with all these factors.

I swear, getting help with this has been impossible. He has so many properties but this is it for me. I really want to get this right.

 

[adjusterjack]

I'm REALLY trying to get legal help with this but getting the run-around. Family lawyers tell me it's a real estate law issue. They tell me it's a family law issue or that a realtor should be able to help me. They refer me to a real estate lawyer. Any advice?

You're over thinking this. It's not a family law issue. It's a real estate issue. You're both partners in real estate and you want to buy him out.

The latest is that we let the current low-interest loan ride until rates come down and I refinance. I pay him some chunk toward his share of the equity soon when my inheritance comes in, and we agree to a later payoff of the balance when the home sells. But the amount is so hard to determine with all these factors.

No it's not. You pick a number. You tell him the number and how you want to pay it.

If he doesn't like your number he gives you a number.

What's so hard about that?

Have you given him the numbers from my analysis in Post 45?.

If yes, with what result.

If not, what are you waiting for?

You don't need lawyers to reach a number. Once you have the number and an agreement on how to pay him, all you need is a lawyer to draw up a mortgage contract and a quitclaim deed.

 

[Eccentrica_Gallumbits]

You're over thinking this. It's not a family law issue. It's a real estate issue. You're both partners in real estate and you want to buy him out.



No it's not. You pick a number. You tell him the number and how you want to pay it.

If he doesn't like your number he gives you a number.

What's so hard about that?

Have you given him the numbers from my analysis in Post 45?.

If yes, with what result.

If not, what are you waiting for?

You don't need lawyers to reach a number. Once you have the number and an agreement on how to pay him, all you need is a lawyer to draw up a mortgage contract and a quitclaim deed.

For one, he thinks the selling costs are minor and don't need to be included. And every time we talk, he seems to come up with something different. He legit floated that scenario about us paying off the house and extending a loan to me, and the next time we talked got mad at me about it.

 

[adjusterjack]

Seems to me you have three choices:

1 - Give him what he wants and get it over with.

2 - Give him nothing and stay put. You're half owner. You can maintain the status quo as long as you want. The risk is that he files for partition and you lose the house.

3 - You file for partition and risk losing the house.

 

[Eccentrica_Gallumbits]

Thank you. Right now we're in a holding pattern. I'm feeling like there's little incentive for me to act right now. I don't think he'd file a partition lawsuit in which we would both probably end up with nothing.

Ok one more question because I see conflicting info. As joint tenants, can he or can't he transfer / sell his ownership to someone without my consent?

And what would that mean for me?

It seems like given the due-on-sale clause, which makes it possible for the lender to call in the loan with any transfer of title, such a transfer shouldn't be allowed if both are on the mortgage, because of the impact it has on the person stuck reacting.

 

[Taxing Matters]

He can transfer his interest to someone else without your consent. But few buyers would pay anywhere close to true market value for a half interest in a home with another person whom they do not know. As far as the due on sale clause, that's a risk you take when you are a co-obligor on a mortgage.

 

[Eccentrica_Gallumbits]

He can transfer his interest to someone else without your consent. But few buyers would pay anywhere close to true market value for a half interest in a home with another person whom they do not know. As far as the due on sale clause, that's a risk you take when you are a co-obligor on a mortgage.

Thank you. That makes sense. And the risk he would take if he DID sell his interest is that the clause would be triggered, the house foreclosed on, and his credit ruined along with mine, because he'd still be on the mortgage. He can't force me to refinance in my name only, right? So, that would be dumb. And a partition lawsuit would be dumb, because of high legal costs (though I think he could include in the lawsuit asking for me pay his legal costs). But regardless, the proceeds would be diminished if auctioned off.

I could really just hang on here indefinitely, if my assumptions about his judgment are correct.

I intend to be fair to him and try to buy him out. But this helps me understand what leverage and options I have when negotiating. Thank you.

 

[Taxing Matters]

And the risk he would take if he DID sell his interest is that the clause would be triggered, the house foreclosed on, and his credit ruined along with mine, because he'd still be on the mortgage. He can't force me to refinance in my name only, right? So, that would be dumb.

Correct, he cannot force you to refinance should the due on sale clause get triggered. So should that happen and he wants to preserve his credit, he'd either work with you to resolve the problem or simply pay off the mortgage to preserve his credit and then sue you for contribution (i.e. sue you for your share of the mortgage that he paid off).

But regardless, the proceeds would be diminished if auctioned off.

That's right. If the home is foreclosed, you both will end up getting quite a bit less out of the sale than you would in a regular sale because buyers at foreclosures don't know exactly what they are getting and are taking some risk, and the lower bids represent what they will to pay to take that risk. Knowing that, and the hit to his credit, should motivate him to work with you for some resolution that would be better than that. Of course, not everyone thinks logically about this stuff; if he lets emotion get in the way, he may end up being resistant to negotiation with the result that foreclosure ends up being the resolution by default.