Not divorced but husband is holding up money from the sale of our house. Is this legal?

[TKAngels]

What is the name of your state? New York

Hello,

I need some advice desperately. My husband just called the lawyer for the sale of our house and said he is not releasing any money until we come to an agreement. The thing is we already did. He would let me have the portion needed for the down payment on my new house and he would take the rest. He has NEVER paid mortgage and works off the books 6 months after buying this home. I need that money to buy my new home from the sale of this home, which I already signed a contract on. If we can't come to an agreement, then we will both be sued for breach of contract buy the buyers of this home. Can he legally do this to me with holding up the money? Does the house lawyer really have to have an agreement legally just because he called their office and said he does not want to release the money? I don't understand why this is??? We are still 100% married anybody should be able to pick up the check.

There is no separation agreement or divorce at all. No divorce lawyers are involved for either party. Please help. I am in tears because I won't be able to buy my house that I already signed a contract on.

 

[adjusterjack]

No divorce lawyers are involved for either party.

Well, now you'd better damned well get one.

 

[not2cleverRed]

There is no separation agreement or divorce at all.

Well, there you are.

You are married. You need a lawyer, since it's not going to be an amicable parting of ways.

 

[TKAngels]

Well, now you'd better damned well get one.

I can't afford one

 

[TKAngels]

Well, there you are.

You are married. You need a lawyer, since it's not going to be an amicable parting of ways.

New and old House is supposed to close at the end of this month. I just don't have the money because he made me pay for everything for the sale of the house and extras that come with it. I am broke, but yet make too much to afford an free lawyer. I only make 61,000 a year. I don't know what to do. All of my savings have been depleted. Also, due to the new sale, I can't put anything on credit cards that would affect my overall debt balance. I was just hopeing a lawyer or someone with some legal knowledge in this area would know.

 

[Taxing Matters]

Both you and the ex are in the same boat: you likely own the home as tenancy by the entirety, and as a result both have to be on board with the terms of the deal and sign the deed with the buyer. The buyer gets nothing without both of you signing off. So that puts you in a stand off. The check will have both names on it and unless he intends to commit the crimes of forgery and fraud both signatures endorsing the check will be needed. So you can hold things up until you're satisfied with the split of the funds, and any deal you make the ex you should get that in writing signed by your ex so he can't back out at the last minute to try to grab more. You might want to tell your ex to sign off on a written version of the oral agreement you made or nobody gets anything and that the deal you two made is the best he'll be able to get. This is the point that you each have your maximum leverage because you need each other for the sale, and if your deal gives him more than half the sale money, you have the upper hand because in a divorce you'd presumptively get 50%. In other words, for him he'd be stupid to hold out on this because he'll shoot himself in the foot in the process.

It may help too to remind him that if you two have to litigate the split, either now or in a divorce, it'll cost you each legal fees which means that you both walk away with less than you otherwise could have. If your deal gave him more than half of the house proceeds, you may want to remind him than in NY the presumptive split is 50% each and honoring the deal he made with you is almost certainly the best he'll see out of the sale. In other words, the stunt he's pulling is a stupid one for him; it only works if you fold and give in to what he wants. And that may be what he thinks he can pressure you into doing. So you want to stand firm on this one. If you fold and the house closes with him taking everything then you'll likely not ever see a penny of the house sale money. See if you can find a real estate lawyer who will be willing to wait until the house sale closes to get paid. Then you can use your split of the sale to pay the fees and the rest you will be safely yours once it's divided and you have a check in hand for your portion of the sale. I'm not your lawyer and can't be because I'm not licensed in NY. You want specific legal advice from a NY lawyer to make the most out of the position you have. My goal here is mostly to impress upon you that this is a time to stand firm with your ex. He's got more to lose here, and if you make it clear you know it, he should go back to the deal you struck if he's smart.

In short, make it clear to him that the deal you two made is the best he'll get and he's stupid not to uphold that deal. If the sale falls apart because of his stunt, he'll almost certainly never see as much out of this as what is on the table now. What he's doing now is putting that at risk. Greed makes people do stupid things, and just from what you've said here it sounds like that describes your ex.

 

[zddoodah]

the lawyer for the sale of our house

What does this mean? Whom does this lawyer represent? Who owns the house? You and your husband jointly? What is the current status of the sale?

and said he is not releasing any money until we come to an agreement.

"He" being your husband? What money are we talking about? Releasing money to whom? Agreement about what?

I need that money to buy my new home from the sale of this home, which I already signed a contract on. If we can't come to an agreement, then we will both be sued for breach of contract buy the buyers of this home.

I assume that you're selling your marital home, but I'm uncertain why the lack of agreement between the two of you regarding the division of the proceeds of the sale might result in a breach of contract.

Can he legally do this to me with holding up the money?

There is no possible way for anyone here to know. One would need to review the relevant contracts and related documents and obtain clarity about the facts.

Does the house lawyer really have to have an agreement legally just because he called their office and said he does not want to release the money?

Again, I don't know what "the house lawyer" means, but the answer likely depends on the terms of the contract by which this person was engaged to do whatever he/she is doing. Did you call this "house lawyer" and ask him/her this question? If not, why not? If so, what response did you receive?

 

[TKAngels]

Both you and the ex are in the same boat: you likely own the home as tenancy by the entirety, and as a result both have to be on board with the terms of the deal and sign the deed with the buyer. The buyer gets nothing without both of you signing off. So that puts you in a stand off. The check will have both names on it and unless he intends to commit the crimes of forgery and fraud both signatures endorsing the check will be needed. So you can hold things up until you're satisfied with the split of the funds, and any deal you make the ex you should get that in writing signed by your ex so he can't back out at the last minute to try to grab more. You might want to tell your ex to sign off on a written version of the oral agreement you made or nobody gets anything and that the deal you two made is the best he'll be able to get. This is the point that you each have your maximum leverage because you need each other for the sale, and if your deal gives him more than half the sale money, you have the upper hand because in a divorce you'd presumptively get 50%. In other words, for him he'd be stupid to hold out on this because he'll shoot himself in the foot in the process.

It may help too to remind him that if you two have to litigate the split, either now or in a divorce, it'll cost you each legal fees which means that you both walk away with less than you otherwise could have. If your deal gave him more than half of the house proceeds, you may want to remind him than in NY the presumptive split is 50% each and honoring the deal he made with you is almost certainly the best he'll see out of the sale. In other words, the stunt he's pulling is a stupid one for him; it only works if you fold and give in to what he wants. And that may be what he thinks he can pressure you into doing. So you want to stand firm on this one. If you fold and the house closes with him taking everything then you'll likely not ever see a penny of the house sale money. See if you can find a real estate lawyer who will be willing to wait until the house sale closes to get paid. Then you can use your split of the sale to pay the fees and the rest you will be safely yours once it's divided and you have a check in hand for your portion of the sale. I'm not your lawyer and can't be because I'm not licensed in NY. You want specific legal advice from a NY lawyer to make the most out of the position you have. My goal here is mostly to impress upon you that this is a time to stand firm with your ex. He's got more to lose here, and if you make it clear you know it, he should go back to the deal you struck if he's smart.

In short, make it clear to him that the deal you two made is the best he'll get and he's stupid not to uphold that deal. If the sale falls apart because of his stunt, he'll almost certainly never see as much out of this as what is on the table now. What he's doing now is putting that at risk. Greed makes people do stupid things, and just from what you've said here it sounds like that describes your ex.

Oh wow...thank you so much Taxing for your knowledge and sharing it with me. He is very very greedy to the point that he does not even care about his son. He is hurting him in this process as well because he cares more about the money. I will find a real estate lawyer. I talked to a few divorce lawyers and they all want around 5 grand...sigh...

 

[TKAngels]

What does this mean? Whom does this lawyer represent? Who owns the house? You and your husband jointly? What is the current status of the sale?

The lawyer represents the sale of our house. It is jointly owned. It is almost in closing status.


"He" being your husband? What money are we talking about? Releasing money to whom? Agreement about what?


Yes, the money from the sale of the house after the current mortgage is paid. Releasing the money to either I or my husband. The check will have both of our names. We had a verbal agreement that I could use what I needed for the down payment on my new house and he would take the rest. Now he is being very evil doing everything he can to hurt me.

I assume that you're selling your marital home, but I'm uncertain why the lack of agreement between the two of you regarding the division of the proceeds of the sale might result in a breach of contract.

Yes, well the lawyer for the house said we have to come to an agreement. I am uncertain as well. Also, the lawyer wants it in writing.


There is no possible way for anyone here to know. One would need to review the relevant contracts and related documents and obtain clarity about the facts.


Yes, I called the lawyer for the sale of the house and that is what he told me. Because my husband called the lawyers office and said he would not agree to the release of funds until we come to an agreement. Therefore, it needs to be in writing but this does not sound right.

Again, I don't know what "the house lawyer" means, but the answer likely depends on the terms of the contract by which this person was engaged to do whatever he/she is doing. Did you call this "house lawyer" and ask him/her this question? If not, why not? If so, what response did you receive?

 

[zddoodah]

A lawyer cannot "represent[] the sale of [a] house." I'm guessing that the lawyer represents you and your husband jointly. If I'm right, you'll need separate legal counsel to deal with the dispute with your husband.

 

[LdiJ]

Ok, first, your husband's refusal to sign off on the release of the money shouldn't effect the actual sale of the house, the sale should still go through unless your husband is also refusing to sign the closing paperwork.

Second, do you know what it is that he wants at this point? If you don't, you need to find out. That doesn't mean that you can or should agree with what he wants, but you need to know exactly what it is before you can effectively deal with the situation. "He is greedy" is not a helpful answer to you or to anyone advising you.

If he is going to get much less than he anticipated because 1) your down payment needs are higher than anticipated or 2) you are getting less from the sale than anticipated or 3) the closing costs are higher than anticipated, then he might be right to be questioning things at this point. If you both own the house then it doesn't matter which one of you paid the mortgage payment, you would both normally be entitled to 1/2 of the equity in the home. However, at the same time you would normally both be entitled to 1/2 of all other marital assets and responsible for 1/2 of all marital debts, so all of that factors in as well.

 

[Litigator22]

What is the name of your state? New York

Hello,

I need some advice desperately. My husband just called the lawyer for the sale of our house and said he is not releasing any money until we come to an agreement. The thing is we already did. He would let me have the portion needed for the down payment on my new house and he would take the rest. He has NEVER paid mortgage and works off the books 6 months after buying this home. I need that money to buy my new home from the sale of this home, which I already signed a contract on. If we can't come to an agreement, then we will both be sued for breach of contract buy the buyers of this home. Can he legally do this to me with holding up the money? Does the house lawyer really have to have an agreement legally just because he called their office and said he does not want to release the money? I don't understand why this is??? We are still 100% married anybody should be able to pick up the check.

There is no separation agreement or divorce at all. No divorce lawyers are involved for either party. Please help. I am in tears because I won't be able to buy my house that I already signed a contract on.

PLEASE PAY ATTENTION to what I am about to tell you! Because you have bigger problems than how to split the proceeds from the sale of "our house"!

The troubles stem from the fact (1) you two remain a married couple and (2) that by virtue of New York Domestic Relation Laws any and all assets that either of you acquire during the marriage are presumed to be marital or jointly owned property!

Which means that not only are the proceeds from the sale of "our house" marital property, but also any property rights that you might acquire upon closing the purchase contract covering the new home will become marital property.

(And this is so irrespective of the fact that your husband may not be named as a buyer in the contract for the purchase of the new home.)

Not only would you be using a marital asset as a down payment on the new home, but you'd also be purchasing it during your marriage. In other words, a "a double dip'' favoring it as a marital asset!

However, please note that I advisedly wrote "presumed to be marital property".

In legal terms it means that assets acquired during marriage that otherwise would be included in the marital estate (jointly owned) can be attribute to and become the sole and separate property of a named spouse; PROVIDED, there exists a marital agreement designed for that express purpose and effect.

In other words, the marital estate can make a gift of a marital asset to an individual spouse's separate estate. And one spouse can denounce/ waive/gift a marital claim favoring the other. But in the present context and the husband's hostility it ought to be formally documented. And despite your urging, "we did agree" I don't see that has ever happened or likely to happen.

ADDING:

If you are interested in learning how at little cost you can achieve your wish to own the new home as your sole and separate property by utilizing the existing window of opportunity, just ask. But you need to do so before the window closes.