My son legally has to start kindergarten, and we do not have a designated home address.

[D6800]

Hello,

My son legally has to start kindergarten this upcoming Florida school year. We had three different court dates to award a school district, but we still need to finish, and we now have a court date in January 2025. I am concerned my current attorney is misdirecting me by telling me to send him to two different schools. This is not the type of person I am, nor do I want our son to be ripped out of school and driven to another school until one of us gives up or DCF is involved, but I'm at a loss for how to move forward.

Information:
The agreed parenting plan is 50/50 on parental decision-making and timesharing.
We agreed on our parenting plan and child support but left home address designation to be decided by a judge ten months before the school year commenced.
My days are every Monday, Tuesday & every other weekend.
Her days are Wednesday, Thursday & every other weekend.
We live 26.6 miles apart.
Child exchanges are to be held at the school once elementary school starts.

Court hearing:
I (father) selected a private school by my address (our son tested & was awarded a seat).
Mother put the son in a public school lottery, & our son was awarded a seat.
Our judge would only grant a temporary home address once all case facts were heard.
Also, our judge stated that no emergency hearing would be granted since Florida does not recognize education as an emergency.

Since our court date:
The mother enrolled our child in her school without my consent.
The mother called/emailed to unenroll our child from my selected private school.
She threatened to withhold our son on my weekend so she could start our son at her school.
I have enrolled our son in my designated public school.

Misc. facts.
Your child can only miss five days out of 30 in Florida before a neglect case is opened.
My first choice was a school located at an equal distance from both of us. However, this was also turned down, so I selected the private school closest to my address.
I have tried to reason with the mother, but she is unwilling to work with me.

I would greatly appreciate any help you can give.

Best Regards,
D6800

 

[quincy]

Hello,

My son legally has to start kindergarten this upcoming Florida school year. We had three different court dates to award a school district, but we still need to finish, and we now have a court date in January 2025. I am concerned my current attorney is misdirecting me by telling me to send him to two different schools. This is not the type of person I am, nor do I want our son to be ripped out of school and driven to another school until one of us gives up or DCF is involved, but I'm at a loss for how to move forward.

Information:
The agreed parenting plan is 50/50 on parental decision-making and timesharing.
We agreed on our parenting plan and child support but left home address designation to be decided by a judge ten months before the school year commenced.
My days are every Monday, Tuesday & every other weekend.
Her days are Wednesday, Thursday & every other weekend.
We live 26.6 miles apart.
Child exchanges are to be held at the school once elementary school starts.

Court hearing:
I (father) selected a private school by my address (our son tested & was awarded a seat).
Mother put the son in a public school lottery, & our son was awarded a seat.
Our judge would only grant a temporary home address once all case facts were heard.
Also, our judge stated that no emergency hearing would be granted since Florida does not recognize education as an emergency.

Since our court date:
The mother enrolled our child in her school without my consent.
The mother called/emailed to unenroll our child from my selected private school.
She threatened to withhold our son on my weekend so she could start our son at her school.
I have enrolled our son in my designated public school.

Misc. facts.
Your child can only miss five days out of 30 in Florida before a neglect case is opened.
My first choice was a school located at an equal distance from both of us. However, this was also turned down, so I selected the private school closest to my address.
I have tried to reason with the mother, but she is unwilling to work with me.

I would greatly appreciate any help you can give.

Best Regards,
D6800

Who created the 26.6 mile distance?

Where does your son live on Fridays, or are Fridays part of the every other weekend?

Who would be responsible for paying for the private school?

Enrolling your child in two different schools is not only a rather stupid solution, I don’t think Florida permits it (although I didn’t check - maybe someone else will).

 

[LdiJ]

Hello,

My son legally has to start kindergarten this upcoming Florida school year. We had three different court dates to award a school district, but we still need to finish, and we now have a court date in January 2025. I am concerned my current attorney is misdirecting me by telling me to send him to two different schools. This is not the type of person I am, nor do I want our son to be ripped out of school and driven to another school until one of us gives up or DCF is involved, but I'm at a loss for how to move forward.

Information:
The agreed parenting plan is 50/50 on parental decision-making and timesharing.
We agreed on our parenting plan and child support but left home address designation to be decided by a judge ten months before the school year commenced.
My days are every Monday, Tuesday & every other weekend.
Her days are Wednesday, Thursday & every other weekend.
We live 26.6 miles apart.
Child exchanges are to be held at the school once elementary school starts.

Court hearing:
I (father) selected a private school by my address (our son tested & was awarded a seat).
Mother put the son in a public school lottery, & our son was awarded a seat.
Our judge would only grant a temporary home address once all case facts were heard.
Also, our judge stated that no emergency hearing would be granted since Florida does not recognize education as an emergency.

Since our court date:
The mother enrolled our child in her school without my consent.
The mother called/emailed to unenroll our child from my selected private school.
She threatened to withhold our son on my weekend so she could start our son at her school.
I have enrolled our son in my designated public school.

Misc. facts.
Your child can only miss five days out of 30 in Florida before a neglect case is opened.
My first choice was a school located at an equal distance from both of us. However, this was also turned down, so I selected the private school closest to my address.
I have tried to reason with the mother, but she is unwilling to work with me.

I would greatly appreciate any help you can give.

Best Regards,
D6800

You won't win on the private school unless you are willing to 100% pay for it. You won't find a judge that will force a parent to pay for private school unless it is a situation where the child was in private school before the parents ever split up.

You and mom are both at fault here. Neither one of you are putting the best interest of the child first. You should have known that living that far apart and having a 50/50 timeshare was not going to work once your child started school. The two of you should be living in the same school district. Since you are the one I am talking to you could do the best thing for your child and move to mom's area so that there will be no dispute about where he goes to school.

 

[D6800]

Who created the 26.6 mile distance?

Where does your son live on Fridays, or are Fridays part of the every other weekend?

Who would be responsible for paying for the private school?

Enrolling your child in two different schools is not only a rather stupid solution, but I don’t think Florida permits it (although I didn’t check—maybe someone else will).

We never lived together or in the same city.
When our son was born, we lived 22 miles apart. Both of us have moved, and now we are 26.6 miles apart.

Fridays are considered part of the every other weekend.

I was offering to pay for the private school in full.

Florida does not stop double enrollment, but a case can be opened for neglect once he misses five out of thirty days.

I agree with you entirely. A school in the middle is the best solution, but the mother is unwilling to compromise.

 

[adjusterjack]

I have tried to reason with the mother, but she is unwilling to work with me.

You mean she's not willing bend to your demands. The same can be said of you.

Jeez. Another pair of hostile parents using their kid as a pawn in their battle for supremacy.

You two are going to eff up your kid so bad that one day he will end up on a rooftop with a rifle.

I agree with LdiJ's comment. The weekday custody split was doomed to failure.

Give the mother weekdays and you get weekends and let the kid go to public school.

 

[LdiJ]

You mean she's not willing bend to your demands. The same can be said of you.

Jeez. Another pair of hostile parents using their kid as a pawn in their battle for supremacy.

You two are going to eff up your kid so bad that one day he will end up on a rooftop with a rifle.

I agree with LdiJ's comment. The weekday custody split was doomed to failure.

Give the mother weekdays and you get weekends and let the kid go to public school.

Or as I suggested, move to mom's school district so that things are best for him rather than the two of you. You might have a further commute to work, but you commuting to work is a lot fairer than your child having to commute to school or getting to spend less time with one of his parents.

 

[quincy]

Home schooling your son might also be an option for you and your son’s mom to consider, if you two are up for the challenge.

https://www.fldoe.org/schools/school-choice/other-school-choice-options/home-edu/

 

[Zigner]

Home schooling your son might also be an option for you and your son’s mom to consider, if you two are up for the challenge.

https://www.fldoe.org/schools/school-choice/other-school-choice-options/home-edu/

I agree, but it's fairly obvious that these two parents are not up to the challenge of such an arrangement.

 

[quincy]

I agree, but it's fairly obvious that these two parents are not up to the challenge of such an arrangement.

You are no doubt right.

I was thinking it might be workable as a temporary solution until a more permanent solution can be determined in January 2025, with the help of the court.

The 26 mile distance between homes/school really should not be a major issue for either parent. It is not enough of a distance to justify this dispute over the school’s location.

 

[LdiJ]

You are no doubt right.

I was thinking it might be workable as a temporary solution until a more permanent solution can be determined in January 2025, with the help of the court.

It definitely is a viable suggestion as a temporary solution.

The 26 mile distance between homes/school really should not be a major issue for either parent. It is not enough of a distance to justify this dispute over the school’s location.

It really depends on where the parents work in relation to the child's school and the traffic in the area. The parent's works schedules will matter as well. If either parent works in the opposite direction to the school that poses an additional problem, and in some areas traffic would make 26 miles a two hour round trip...twice a day no less.

We sent my granddaughter to a school that was 22 miles away one year, traffic was not a problem and we still gave it up after one year as unworkable. It was basically an hour round trip twice a day, and the cost in gasoline, time and wear and tear on the car was just too much for us.

Also, D6800 the hardship posed to each of you will factor into the judge's decision as well. Also keep in mind that the judge can only entertain options that you or mom include in your case. So, if neither of you asks the judge to consider the option of a school halfway between the two of you, the judge won't consider it.

 

[PayrollHRGuy]

My son legally has to start kindergarten this upcoming Florida school year.

https://www.fldoe.org/how-do-i/attendance-enrollment.stml#:~:text=No. A parent that chooses not to,in violation of compulsory school attendance laws.