13 year old in trouble for receiving topless photo of classmate

[PsychePunk]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? California

The school called me today to tell me six students reported that he had a topless photo of a female classmate on his cell phone. They were waiting to talk to him, but warned me he could be charged as a sex offender. After talking to him they called me back and reported that they still needed to talk to the girl but were going to try and keep the authorities out of it. They said he admitted to it right away and gave them his phone. They confirmed he received the photo, unsolicited and he him self had only forwarded it to one person. But as of today this photo is being circulated in three middle schools. They said he as an exemplary record and is well respected by teachers and students alike. OK, so that is the good news. I am still concerned. I want to be able to protect his rights and at the same time assure the school I understand that this is serious. I do understand my kid made a poor decision and I want him to understand that not knowing it was wrong doesn't excuse his responsibility in this. But, I also don't see him as the villain in this. I want to be prepared. Any advice is appreciated.

 

[Zigner]

I would suggest that you start interviewing attorneys.

Are you suggesting that, in this day and age, your 13 year old son didn't know it was wrong to have and/or send a topless photo of a 12-14 year old girl to other people?

 

[PsychePunk]

I am embarrassed to say I did not know this was illegal. I am very upset that my son made the choice to send it to even one person. I do believe he did not think it would end up in three middle schools. The counselor told me he is extremely remorseful. I haven't spoken to my son yet. She also said his remorse and cooperation are why they are leaning towards handling it all within the school. When they looked through his phone, she said the messages back up what he had to say. This is a very good kid. I am certain he knew it was wrong to send the picture. I doubt he thought t was wrong to keep it.

 

[Just Blue]

I am embarrassed to say I did not know. illegalthis was I am very upset that my son made the choice to send it to even one person. I do believe he did not think it would end up in three middle schools. The counselor told me he is extremely remorseful. I haven't spoken to my son yet. She also said his remorse and cooperation are why they are leaning towards handling it all within the school. When they looked through his phone, she said the messages back up what he had to say. This is a very good kid. I am certain he knew it was wrong to send the picture. I doubt he thought t was wrong to keep it.

I find it kinda ...odd that at your age you haven't watched the new or read a newpaper and seen the multi reports of sexting underaged sexual comments or photos.

 

[RRevak]

OP needs to stop posting on the internet and start calling attorneys. Just because the school is potentially choosing to not involve law enforcement doesn't mean the parents of the girl are going to do the same. If they do, kiddo is potentially going to end up in a world of awful seeing as he chose to forward said photo to another person.

 

[Zigner]

OP needs to stop posting on the internet and start calling attorneys. Just because the school is potentially choosing to not involve law enforcement doesn't mean the parents of the girl are going to do the same. If they do, kiddo is potentially going to end up in a world of awful seeing as he chose to forward said photo to another person.

I'm a bit surprised the the school personnel (all mandated reporters) haven't already reported this. Then again, maybe they have.

 

[RRevak]

I'm a bit surprised the the school personnel (all mandated reporters) haven't already reported this. Then again, maybe they have.

Eh, I wouldn't bet the farm on that one. Not all schools choose to bring that type of drama into their midst unless it looks like it might get legally ugly for them. In fact, I know this to be true in at least one school in my area. About 2 wks ago there was a boy accused of sexual harassment towards another girl in my daughters school. End result was the school chose to speak to the parents and suspend the boy for 2 days. No law enforcement was contacted. Nor were they contacted a month ago when this happened then with the same boy and the same girl.

 

[Zigner]

Eh, I wouldn't bet the farm on that one. Not all schools choose to bring that type of drama into their midst unless it looks like it might get legally ugly for them. In fact, I know this to be true in at least one school in my area. About 2 wks ago there was a boy accused of sexual harassment towards another girl in my daughters school. End result was the school chose to speak to the parents and suspend the boy for 2 days. No law enforcement was contacted. Nor were they contacted a month ago when this happened then with the same boy and the same girl.

Are you in CA? We tend to be hyper-vigilant about this sort of thing. All those lawyers and such...

 

[RRevak]

Are you in CA? We tend to be hyper-vigilant about this sort of thing. All those lawyers and such...

Nope, i'm in the sunny side of the east coast. This is a charter school so i'm unfamiliar with how they are allowed to run things. I'm almost certain that if this were to have occured in her previous public school law enforcement would absolutely been involved from the reporting of the first incident.

 

[PsychePunk]

OP needs to stop posting on the internet and start calling attorneys. Just because the school is potentially choosing to not involve law enforcement doesn't mean the parents of the girl are going to do the same. If they do, kiddo is potentially going to end up in a world of awful seeing as he chose to forward said photo to another person.

The girl faces three felonies, my son two, his friend two. I doubt her parents are eager to get law enforcement involved.

 

[PsychePunk]

I find it kinda ...odd that at your age you haven't watched the new or read a newpaper and seen the multi reports of sexting underaged sexual comments or photos.

Yes, I have. What I didn't know is that a 13 year old girl who sends a photo of herself to a 13 year old boy could end up having to register as a sex offender for the rest of her life. I also didn't know the boy she sent it to could also.

 

[PsychePunk]

Are you in CA? We tend to be hyper-vigilant about this sort of thing. All those lawyers and such...

I'm in Southern California. Everything is OK. It turns out the other boy did not send the photo on to anyone else. The girl herself is responsible for the mass distribution, although knowing the circumstances I don't believe that is what she intended. It is all very unfortunate, and I do not envy her parents right now. I guess the girl is mortified. A very hard lesson learned today. But, I am changing my son's phone plan - he will not be able to send or receive any media of any sort.
Even though he didn't make any excuses, I don't want him receiving anymore of these, I can't be sure he will do the right thing, at least not at thirteen. Thank you.

 

[Zigner]

I'm in Southern California. Everything is OK. It turns out the other boy did not send the photo on to anyone else. The girl herself is responsible for the mass distribution, although knowing the circumstances I don't believe that is what she intended. It is all very unfortunate, and I do not envy her parents right now. I guess the girl is mortified. A very hard lesson learned today. But, I am changing my son's phone plan - he will not be able to send or receive any media of any sort.
Even though he didn't make any excuses, I don't want him receiving anymore of these, I can't be sure he will do the right thing, at least not at thirteen. Thank you.

My question was actually to RRevak and had to do with the different attitudes towards mandatory reporting.

 

[CdwJava]

This is arguably a matter of mandatory reporting, and the school officials involved could be guilty of a crime if they fail to report the incident to CPS and/or the police. That does not mean anyone will be prosecuted for it, but the school SHOULD have reported it. I'm more than a little concerned that they apparently chose not to.

 

[Ohiogal]

Eh, I wouldn't bet the farm on that one. Not all schools choose to bring that type of drama into their midst unless it looks like it might get legally ugly for them. In fact, I know this to be true in at least one school in my area. About 2 wks ago there was a boy accused of sexual harassment towards another girl in my daughters school. End result was the school chose to speak to the parents and suspend the boy for 2 days. No law enforcement was contacted. Nor were they contacted a month ago when this happened then with the same boy and the same girl.

By not reporting it, they are breaking the law. Schools are MANDATED to report this type of stuff. MANDATED.