15 yr old doesnt want to go back to live with dad

[ibnatasha2u]

What is the name of your state?What is the name of your state?Washington
My ex has custody of our 15 yr old daughter in Kansas. She has been here in Washington for summer break with me. She has desided that she wants to stay here with me.
We told my ex yesterday and he threw a fit. Said he was not going to allow her to stay, that he has too much time and money invested in her at this point.
Our divorce was in Kansas. I moved with my daughter and her older brother back to my home state of Washington, the kids went to Kansas for the usual long distance visitation in the summers.
due to circumstances I was unable to have the kids in my custody for a period of time and sent them out to their dad. He filed for residential custody
when he knew I had no way to fight him in court because I didnt have the $$ to go back to Kansas for court hearings.
He sent our son back to me within a year, but not our daughter. Now after 6 years she wants to remain here with me. Can someone tell me what I need to do and also what he might be able to do?
Can I go throught the courts here in Washington state? Can he have my daughter picked up and forced to go back there?
I know I need to do SOMETHING soon, possibly as soon as TODAY.

 

[legalcuriosity]

What is the name of your state?What is the name of your state?Washington
My ex has custody of our 15 yr old daughter in Kansas. She has been here in Washington for summer break with me. She has desided that she wants to stay here with me.
We told my ex yesterday and he threw a fit. Said he was not going to allow her to stay, that he has too much time and money invested in her at this point.
Our divorce was in Kansas. I moved with my daughter and her older brother back to my home state of Washington, the kids went to Kansas for the usual long distance visitation in the summers.
due to circumstances I was unable to have the kids in my custody for a period of time and sent them out to their dad. He filed for residential custody
when he knew I had no way to fight him in court because I didnt have the $$ to go back to Kansas for court hearings.
He sent our son back to me within a year, but not our daughter. Now after 6 years she wants to remain here with me. Can someone tell me what I need to do and also what he might be able to do?
Can I go throught the courts here in Washington state? Can he have my daughter picked up and forced to go back there?
I know I need to do SOMETHING soon, possibly as soon as TODAY.

Until custody changes, she has no choice than to go back to Dad's. You can certainly get the paperwork going for a chance of custody and you must file the paperwork through Kansas, since that is where the child resides.

Failure to send her back will result in contempt charges and you might as well forget about even attempting to change custody.

 

[rmet4nzkx]

Kansas has jurisdiciton. You do not have residential custody, you have visitation. You have to return your daughter or you will be in contempt and that will adversely affect any future modification you might make in Kansas. Send your daughter back and retain an attorney in Kansas if you wish to modify custody. You will have to show the court that it is in the best interest of your daughter to chnage custody. Seriously look at her reasons for the change, is it about not wanting to follow rules or dad being too strict? Teenagers often rebel at this point in life no matter what the family or custody situation and teenage girls can be very manipulative. Summer visitation is much different than the school year.

 

[rmet4nzkx]

After a review of your posts it seems this is something you have been planning for some time, not your daughter's sudden desire or best interest and while you might have has a valid reason, the fact that none is mentioned leads me to believe that there is no compelling reason for a change in custody. https://forum.freeadvice.com/showthread.php?t=232410
Also you stated that you were unable to care for your daughter and your other posts seem to confirm that your life is not so stable and your attitude at times less than conndusive to a healthy environment.

 

[ibnatasha2u]

At 15 does she have any say in this at all?
As for my not being able to care for my daughter, that was 6 years ago and was for less than a year that i was in that situation.I was fully capable of caring for both my kids after that, as I have been and now am able to do.
And the link you put in your reply https://forum.freeadvice.com/showthread.php?t=232410
is to the post where I was asking advice on what to do about my ex's common law wife assaulting my daughter, then being permitted to move back into the home with her.
As for who is the more restrictive parent, it would be me. My ex is someone who believes that "the kids going to do what they want, so why fight with them? As long as I know what they are doing they'll be fine". Ya love his thought process.
Anyway, she's 15 and doesnt want to live there anymore. Of course I'm going to welcome her with open arms, wouldnt you if she were your daughter?
I have a stable home, and a job. My husband and I work together, so we are a double income. My son is now 19 and a part time student and has part time employment. Is that an unhealthy environment?
Thank you for your replies, I will take up some of your advice and start some paper work and contact an attorney out in Kansas.

 

[LdiJ]

At 15 does she have any say in this at all?
As for my not being able to care for my daughter, that was 6 years ago and was for less than a year that i was in that situation.I was fully capable of caring for both my kids after that, as I have been and now am able to do.
And the link you put in your reply https://forum.freeadvice.com/showthread.php?t=232410
is to the post where I was asking advice on what to do about my ex's common law wife assaulting my daughter, then being permitted to move back into the home with her.
As for who is the more restrictive parent, it would be me. My ex is someone who believes that "the kids going to do what they want, so why fight with them? As long as I know what they are doing they'll be fine". Ya love his thought process.
Anyway, she's 15 and doesnt want to live there anymore. Of course I'm going to welcome her with open arms, wouldnt you if she were your daughter?
I have a stable home, and a job. My husband and I work together, so we are a double income. My son is now 19 and a part time student and has part time employment. Is that an unhealthy environment?
Thank you for your replies, I will take up some of your advice and start some paper work and contact an attorney out in Kansas.

Yes, at 15 its likely that your child wish's will be given some weight. However the judge will still make the decision based on best interest.