16 YO niece living with a non relative situation

[shardisky]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? PA

I have a niece that is living with a non relative and he says that he supposively has a notarized statement from the father that he is allowed to take care of my 16 YO niece(I haven't seen it yet). It is only him and her in the house, he is in his 60's. My wife and I are in our late 20's and have an uneasy feeling that it may be a abusive situation. He brings up her and her mothers looks as to why he opened his home to them(mother is out of the picture right now). The mother spoke in past conversation of how he would come onto her and how she repeatedly turned him down. He supposedly also was possessive and invaded their privacy. The mother went to the UK on a trip with her daughter and daughter was abandoned there as her mother has psych issues and then the daughter was deported back here and is living with the non relative as i said just them. I have not followed up with the divorced father to make sure that he did sign something in front of a notary. I wanted advice before i do anything. The niece has serious issues with cutting and self abuse. She was homeschooled since she was 8 with her mother and it's hard to determine what she has gone through. She lived isolated with her mother. The mother was very secretive and had told her daughter many lies about our family. She told her daughter that my wife and I lived far away in Oregon when we live close by in PA, and stated that her family where free masons and such things in order to scare her away and keep her isolated from those who care about her. The mother and daughter moved into this guys home because they had no money and he offered them money based on taking care of the him and his home. The mother told us at one point that he has no interest in the mother staying there without the daughter there which we found kinda shady as well. We have contact with the daughter via cell phone which is paid for by the non relative and we have met with our niece and the guy last week and it was not reassuring. We are able to house our niece as we live in a 2 bedroom apartment and we have no kids. Looking for what we can do to protect her and make sure she is safe and cared for and do we have any say in anything?

 

[justalayman]

The father doesn't have to sign anything nor would it have to be notorized to be enforceable if he had. The question is; has he given his permission to allow his daughter to live with the old guy

So, get on the phone and call him and ask. Maybe he isn't aware of the issues you mention and needs to be enlightened.

 

[CTU]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? PA

I have a niece that is living with a non relative and he says that he supposively has a notarized statement from the father that he is allowed to take care of my 16 YO niece(I haven't seen it yet). It is only him and her in the house, he is in his 60's. My wife and I are in our late 20's and have an uneasy feeling that it may be a abusive situation. He brings up her and her mothers looks as to why he opened his home to them(mother is out of the picture right now). The mother spoke in past conversation of how he would come onto her and how she repeatedly turned him down. He supposedly also was possessive and invaded their privacy. The mother went to the UK on a trip with her daughter and daughter was abandoned there as her mother has psych issues and then the daughter was deported back here and is living with the non relative as i said just them. I have not followed up with the divorced father to make sure that he did sign something in front of a notary. I wanted advice before i do anything. The niece has serious issues with cutting and self abuse. She was homeschooled since she was 8 with her mother and it's hard to determine what she has gone through. She lived isolated with her mother. The mother was very secretive and had told her daughter many lies about our family. She told her daughter that my wife and I lived far away in Oregon when we live close by in PA, and stated that her family where free masons and such things in order to scare her away and keep her isolated from those who care about her. The mother and daughter moved into this guys home because they had no money and he offered them money based on taking care of the him and his home. The mother told us at one point that he has no interest in the mother staying there without the daughter there which we found kinda shady as well. We have contact with the daughter via cell phone which is paid for by the non relative and we have met with our niece and the guy last week and it was not reassuring. We are able to house our niece as we live in a 2 bedroom apartment and we have no kids. Looking for what we can do to protect her and make sure she is safe and cared for and do we have any say in anything?

I'm curious as to why you think you should be notified about anything concerning this minor.

 

[shardisky]

I'm curious as to why you think you should be notified about anything concerning this minor.

Could you clarify? Are you asking why do we feel any desire to be involved in this? If that is what you are asking then the answer is simply to ensure the safety of the minor as she is a blood relative and at the time there is noone but us that have any interest or means in the family to make sure that she is being taking care in a safe and supportive environment. To put this as candid as possible; she has a dead beat dad, a mother who abandoned her, and we want to ensure not to add sexual abuse or any other trauma to that list if we can help it. We want her to know she is loved and to grow up with support at this crucial age. If We were 100% positive there was no abuse involved, we would not pursue anything outside of quality time and a normal family relationship with her, but we have a sense that may not be the case by the *****ness of the situation. . .Hope we answered your question?

 

[LdiJ]

Could you clarify? Are you asking why do we feel any desire to be involved in this? If that is what you are asking then the answer is simply to ensure the safety of the minor as she is a blood relative and at the time there is noone but us that have any interest or means in the family to make sure that she is being taking care in a safe and supportive environment. To put this as candid as possible; she has a dead beat dad, a mother who abandoned her, and we want to ensure not to add sexual abuse or any other trauma to that list if we can help it. We want her to know she is loved and to grow up with support at this crucial age. If We were 100% positive there was no abuse involved, we would not pursue anything outside of quality time and a normal family relationship with her, but we have a sense that may not be the case by the *****ness of the situation. . .Hope we answered your question?

I agree with the fact that you need to be in contact with the father to see whether or not dad has agreed that his daughter should be living with the old guy. You also might want to make a report to CPS that you suspect sexual abuse.

 

[shardisky]

I agree with the fact that you need to be in contact with the father to see whether or not dad has agreed that his daughter should be living with the old guy. You also might want to make a report to CPS that you suspect sexual abuse.

Thank you for the advice.

We will contact the father soon and may think about contacting Ohio CPS. Is there anything that might protect our rights to have a relationship with her? Say he manipulates her away from talking to us? Just worry that he may pull some moves if he feels threatened from a CPS visit? Is there anything we should be prepared for if we go down that road, what could be some outcomes?

 

[CTU]

Thank you for the advice.

We will contact the father soon and may think about contacting Ohio CPS. Is there anything that might protect our rights to have a relationship with her? Say he manipulates her away from talking to us? Just worry that he may pull some moves if he feels threatened from a CPS visit? Is there anything we should be prepared for if we go down that road, what could be some outcomes?

You don't have any rights to a relationship with your niece.

And my previous post was based upon you saying this:

has a notarized statement from the father that he is allowed to take care of my 16 YO niece(I haven't seen it yet)

Nothing more, nothing less.

 

[shardisky]

You don't have any rights to a relationship with your niece.

And my previous post was based upon you saying this:




Nothing more, nothing less.

good to know...thank you

 

[shardisky]

She's only been there a week without her mother there...don't know if that adds or subtracts anything?

 

[stealth2]

Thank you for the advice.

We will contact the father soon and may think about contacting Ohio CPS. Is there anything that might protect our rights to have a relationship with her? Say he manipulates her away from talking to us? Just worry that he may pull some moves if he feels threatened from a CPS visit? Is there anything we should be prepared for if we go down that road, what could be some outcomes?

Bolded shows that you're not all that concerned. Underlined? You have no rights. No standing. No..... anything.

Which parent is your sibling?

 

[shardisky]

Bolded shows that you're not all that concerned. Underlined? You have no rights. No standing. No..... anything.

Which parent is your sibling?

Wife is the Mothers sister

 

[stealth2]

Which parent has custody, legally?

 

[shardisky]

Bolded shows that you're not all that concerned. Underlined? You have no rights. No standing. No..... anything.

Which parent is your sibling?

As far as the concerned bit. . .that is all this really is. We have no hard proof, only a couple red flags of a strange situation. It's sort of a delicate issue as we don't want to estrange the daughter anymore than necessary, but do want to make sure there is no funny business going on if we can. It's possible the old guy recognized the mother is sorta crazy and really is interested in caring for her daughter after seeing how she was treated?

 

[shardisky]

Which parent has custody, legally?

No idea? Mother took off while overseas, Father has been out of the picture for years 10+ as far as we know. The mother was a recluse hiding and this all was opened up recently when the daughter called everyone and there brother looking for some help to get back in the states. Far as we know this old guy the mother and daughter where living with while they where taking care of his house(business relationship) answered her called and paid for her to be shipped back to the US and now is "taking care of her".

 

[shardisky]

Which parent has custody, legally?

Last we know, the mother had custody uncontested. . .dad never fought for her...This was less than a month ago they where together(mother and daughter)