1) So as long as there is no custody order filed I will still have the legal and physical custody because we we not married ?
If he files for custody first what will happen? Will he end up getting our son?
No, he will not. You are & have been Primary Caregiver. You will retain Custody. He must first Establish Paternity (if not already done) then pursue Joint Legal Custody (which he will get) and then establish a visitation schedule conducive to the child's age & distance of travel.
2) How long does the phasing in of the other parent take? Would it be better after the father has been phased in to have me go with my son to fathers state so son knows it's alright?
I'm sure that would be reasonable...make sure you communicate your desire re; this w/Dad. Otherwise, the beginning schedule will most likely have him traveling to CA to visit.
3) If he was to "sign away his right" would he have to come back to CA in order to do that or coul dhe do that from WY? How long does it take to "sign away rights"
He CANNOT just 'sign away his rights'. TPR (Termination of Parental Rights) has strict guidelines in CA. You can read them online, but involve step-parent adoption &/or legal abandonment under these specific circumstances.
He keeps threatening me that he is going to do that. Now that he has been served with CS papers he keeps saying it more frequently, then changes his mine a week later. Right now he keeps telling me that if he files for custody that he will "win beacsue he is in the Natioanl Guard, and works 40 hrs a week." After he has tol dme that just 2 days ago , yesterday he tells me that he wants to have visitation of our son in his state, and for hlidays. I wouldn't mind it later on but with him telling me that he is going to take him from me , I'm afriad to let him leave the state with him.
What can I do ?
Nothing at this point. Wait to see if he actually pays to file & fight it from out of state. Lots of time/money involved there. Then, you respond accordingly.
4) I have filed for Child Support and as soon as I did all this started happening. He told me that he "wasn't going to sign them and that they can't take any money from him unless he signs the papers" I know that it doesn't matter if he signs or not cause I have read the papers and it states that if nothing is done then in 30 days it becomes law and he will have to pay.
My question is how will my son get the money from the child support if the father wont send any out to him?
