ANY and ALL help is GREATLY APPRECIATED

[amybeccamichael]

What is the name of your state? TX divorce is in AL

Sorry in Advance for the length

My husband and I have been married for 4 years this past oct. we have 2 kids and one on the way he decided that he wanted a divorce out of the blue,( I DO NOT WANT THIS ) hes found someone online who is making him believe that a new life with her some where else (canada) will solve all his probs (Iraq was rough on him and he has severe pain and perm. nerve damage along with head full of probs ) So now that you have the baics here are my Q's My husband drew up these papers all on his own and no legal aide place is taking new clients around here and I have no income.

Can he put this and can we still get a divorce now The Husband also acknowledges that the Wife is pregnant with his child, and reserves the right to revisit custody, child support, and any other issues pertaining to this child once the child arrives safely and has a social security number.

Also am I abligated to put forth anything to make this possible Husband and Wife shall have joint custody of Amy , Rebecca . Husband will have optional custody of the children during the summers that end in even numbers, also all holidays that fall on years that end with an odd number. Husband also will have joint visitation on each child’s birthday.

And then is this correct
Husband shall pay the Wife a sum of $450.00 per month for two children, and reserves the right to revisit this claim upon the birth of the third child. This sum is to be paid on the first of the month. Husband shall continue to pay this amount until the children reach the age of majority, becomes self supporting, marries, or dies. Upon each child meeting the previous conditions the sum shall be adjusted by subtracting $225.00 for each child. Husband reserves the right to adjust the total amount to abide by Alabama Basic Child Support Guidelines, since this amount exceeds the child support laws for Alabama.


ANY KIND OF HELP IS APPREICIATED

 

[seniorjudge]

The general rule is that divorces are not granted when the female is pregnant.

 

[tuffbrk]

You should edit your children's names from your post.

The divorce is to be filed in the state in which you and the children reside, presuming your residency was established there.

As Sr Judge pointed out, the pregnancy may prevent the divorce from being granted.

You should also consider googling your state child support guidelines/calculators.

 

[VeronicaLodge]

your husband wants out and you are letting him call the shots and draft the papers? you need a lawyer, some how, some way, i believe you can ask for him to pay your legal fees in the divorce.

 

[TinkerBelleLuvr]

Is your husband still in the military?

 

[TheGeekess]

She can ask for the fees to be paid by the husband. I did, in my second divorce. The first time I went to the lawyer's office, I explained to him the situtation and asked if it would be possible to make him responisble for the fees/payment. My lawyer said yes, and my ex paid the fees.

 

[Isis1]

if i may, i'd like to ask why divorces aren't generally granted during a pregnancy?

 

[Ohiogal]

if i may, i'd like to ask why divorces aren't generally granted during a pregnancy?

Because the child the woman is married to is considered a child of the marriage but unless born during the marriage more steps need to be taken to legally adjudicate daddy. So divorce is not granted due to the hassles associated with paternity.

 

[SMinNJ]

You should edit your children's names from your post.

Editing the children's names out seems a little pointless - look at her screenname .

As for his suggested wording, my non-lawyer opinion is that it sucks. It is very generic, and actually lays out no specifics. If either party chooses to be an egghead, an order written like that would be unenforceable.

Can he put this and can we still get a divorce now The Husband also acknowledges that the Wife is pregnant with his child, and reserves the right to revisit custody, child support, and any other issues pertaining to this child once the child arrives safely and has a social security number.

Also am I abligated to put forth anything to make this possible Husband and Wife shall have joint custody of Amy , Rebecca . Husband will have optional custody of the children during the summers that end in even numbers, also all holidays that fall on years that end with an odd number. Husband also will have joint visitation on each child’s birthday.

Ok, step by step here. This would be better written as -- Husband and wife share joint legal custody of the minor children of the marriage, with the mother being the parent of primary residence (or whatever the legal term is in Alabama). Husband shall exercise parenting time in the summer beginning seven days after school is dismissed and ending seven days prior to the first day of school during any even year. In the event that the children begin or end school on different days, the last final day of school and the first beginning day of school shall be used to allow all children to travel together. Husband shall notify wife at least sixty days in advance of his intention to exercise any or all of his summer parenting time. Each year, both Husband and Wife shall be allowed 2 weeks of uninterrupted parenting time during the summer, and shall notify the other party 45 days in advance of the vacation. In odd years, husband shall be permitted to exercise at least eight hours of parenting time on all holidays. Each parent shall be permitted parenting time with all of the children on each child's birthday for at least four hours.


This does not address standard, during the year visitation... I don't know Alabama, but it seems that most places, at a minimum, consider every other weekend and one dinner night a week as standard. He doesn't address it at all, but I'm sure that unless he truly does intend this to be a long distance situation, he's going to want to see the kids more often than every other summer. Additionally, you need to specifically list what counts as a holiday - as in days off from school, 4th of July, and Labor Day, maybe, with specific times outlined for Christmas and Easter vacations. You may feel that you'd rather work things out between yourselves, and you always can, but if one of you chooses not to play nice, you'll at least have a minimum standard worked out in advance. You also need to decide on transportation - who pays for what, and who is responsible for getting the kids where. If its long distance, at what age do you allow them to fly how, and who pays for each fare? If the transpo is evenly split, the general rule is that the parent receiving the child pays the fare home - if they're going to dad, dad pays, etc. You'll want a concensus on which airports to use, or at least a minimum distance from each home... some parents want to spend less money on tickets flying into alternate airports, but that might create added expense for the parent dropping the child off at the airport.

I also don't get what you mean by "am i obligated to put anything forth to make this possible?" As the custodial parent, you would be responsible for facilitating the relationship between dad and the kids, so yes, you are.

And then is this correct
Husband shall pay the Wife a sum of $450.00 per month for two children, and reserves the right to revisit this claim upon the birth of the third child. This sum is to be paid on the first of the month. Husband shall continue to pay this amount until the children reach the age of majority, becomes self supporting, marries, or dies. Upon each child meeting the previous conditions the sum shall be adjusted by subtracting $225.00 for each child. Husband reserves the right to adjust the total amount to abide by Alabama Basic Child Support Guidelines, since this amount exceeds the child support laws for Alabama.

Husband shall pay the wife $450 each month for two minor children, recognizing that this amount exceeds the Alabama guidelines. Additional support for the third child will be determined upon its birth. Payment will be made on the first of every month by way of (check directly to mom? check to the child support office? wage garnishment?). Support shall end upon court ordered emancipation of each child, according to the guidelines of the state of Alabama. For purposes of redistributing support upon emancipation only, it will be understood that each child's support is approximately is proportionate to the number of children (That's awkward, but support might go up or down, and you don't want to be locked in to how much ends - if there are three children, each emancipated child lowers the support by 1/3.) Either party may seek to have the court recalculate support every three years. (Some states have mandatory cost of living increases, I don't know about Alabama).


Regardless of whether a divorce is granted during pregnancy, I would think that a temporary order for parenting time and support needs to be filed so that he has protection in seeing the children, and you have protection in receiving support.

I am not a lawyer - this is written from my experience in helping my pro se husband and reading far too many custody agreements. Check out www.deltabravo.net for additional parenting plans that you might be able to use. And as was said, don't trust legal advice from your husband - unfortunately, he is the "enemy" now, and his best interests are no longer yours.

 

[Ohiogal]

How does he know it exceeds the Alabama guidelines? Did he run a child support worksheet?

 

[lwpat]

OG
If she lives in Texas and he is in Canada, how does Alabama have any jurisdiction?

 

[Isis1]

Because the child the woman is married to is considered a child of the marriage but unless born during the marriage more steps need to be taken to legally adjudicate daddy. So divorce is not granted due to the hassles associated with paternity.

thanks OG!. I was curious.

 

[Ohiogal]

OG
If she lives in Texas and he is in Canada, how does Alabama have any jurisdiction?

Hell if I know. I missed that. Alabama should NOT have jurisdiction. Texas would at least over custody/chid support issues.

 

[SMinNJ]

Hell if I know. I missed that. Alabama should NOT have jurisdiction. Texas would at least over custody/chid support issues.

Not speaking as to who has jurisdiction, but I think the Canada thing just meant that the woman he met online wants to run away with him to Canada, not that he's already done so...

 

[LdiJ]

Not speaking as to who has jurisdiction, but I think the Canada thing just meant that the woman he met online wants to run away with him to Canada, not that he's already done so...

Its more likely that the woman he wants to live with, lives in Canada. After all, he met her on the internet.