Calla417, Please unlock your thread.

[Isis1]

irrelevant.

 

[Calla417]

How???

Arrrgh! That was my first attempt at forum-posting; not sure how I locked the thread or how to unlock it. Can you help?

 

[Isis1]

on your thread, click on the top link [Thread Tools]. scroll down to [Open Thread], then click on [Perform Action]. it will unlock.

 

[Calla417]

The only thread tool I have access to is "Email this page." I guess it was locked by an administrator?
Oh well....

 

[Silverplum]

The only thread tool I have access to is "Email this page." I guess it was locked by an administrator?
Oh well....

You have to be in your first thread, then click on Thread Tools.

 

[Isis1]

at the top left of the thread, there is the button to [Post Reply].

under that there is a link that says [View First Unread]. on my screen, it's blue. to the right of that, there is a link that says [Link Back]. the next one to the right of that is [Thread Tools]

Admin won't lock your thread unless something REALLY inappropriate is on there. or they caught it as spam.

if all else fails, delete the entire post and repost.

 

[Calla417]

You have to be in your first thread, then click on Thread Tools.

Yes, Silverplum, I was IN my thread when I received that message.
This is turning out to be more work than I'd counted on.
Thanks anyway.

 

[Silverplum]

Calla's original post

Deviant sexual behavior by non-custodial parent

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? SC
My son's father has visitation with our son every other weekend. I don't think (although I don't KNOW) that he engages in any extreme behavior while in the presence of our son, but I DO know that while he is not with our son, he arranges meetings with people via craigslist and other sites for group sex in hotel rooms. Could this have any bearing on his visitation rights?
Also, he allows our son (who is 21 months old) to ride a small motorcycle (with him) without a helmet. I have told him that this is unacceptable, but I have yet to see a helmet for our child.
I do NOT want to completely ostracize my son's father but I do want to make sure that my son is protected from his father's unsafe behavior and activities. What are my options? (This is my first forum post EVER, so please excuse any formatting blunders.) I look forward to hearing advice! Thanks!

 

[MichaCA]

Questions

1. How do you KNOW dad does group sex meetings, and on behalf of CL at that?

2. How do you know the child is without a helmet on the motorcycle? How do you know he is even on the motorcycle? If I knew my child was doing this I would call the county it is occurring in and ask the sheriff or police if there are laws against this. I would have already contacted the father and told him this is a major no no.

 

[Gum_Drop]

Why not buy your son a helmet to wear?

 

[Calla417]

I know about the sex because I have seen messages sent from and received on his cell phone arranging meetings. I know about the motorcycle because I pulled up one day to pick up my child and he was riding with his dad, sans helmet. I'm struggling to afford food and rent at the moment; can't buy a helmet.

 

[stealth2]

Unless he's having group sex in front of the kid - it's moot. It is not illegal (unless minors are involved. SO it's really none of your business.

As for the motorcycle... HAVE you called the cops to ask what the law on this is? That should be your first step. Secondly... what do you mean by "a small motorcycle"? Is it a road-worthy one? Or a toy bike? If the latter, have you checked to see what the appropriate recommended ages are? That would, however, likely fall under a parenting decision.

 

[Isis1]

I know about the sex because I have seen messages sent from and received on his cell phone arranging meetings. I know about the motorcycle because I pulled up one day to pick up my child and he was riding with his dad, sans helmet. I'm struggling to afford food and rent at the moment; can't buy a helmet.

want me to be honest, i'd sell my jewelry, my TV, my DVD's to make sure my child was safe.

and i say that, because i did. at one point, i literally owned nothing except clothes because it was too important for my child to have an appropriate car seat.

 

[stealth2]

I'd bet 6mos of Internet access would cover the helmet.

 

[wileybunch]

OP isn't indicating that Dad isn't having child wear a helmet because he can't afford it so OP providing the helmet isn't necessarily going to get the helmet worn. Maybe OP caught a short ride sorta thing, not something Dad would ordinarily do or maybe Dad's just one of those that things helmets are for sissies or whatever that attitude is. I just don't see that buying one is going to truly solve the problem unless the reason Dad's not using one on child is purely lack of $$$.