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Child refuses to come home

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TinkerBelleLuvr

Senior Member
Many know my history and dad.

Kiddo came home from dad earlier this month. She apologized for all her antics and thanked me for fighting to keep her with me. They eventually figure it out. It does take a while sometimes, but it does NOT pay to bash the other parent.

I had to mail her meds to her this summer because dad couldn't pick up her refill. So yeah, I'm very familiar with the USPS.
 


kaizen

Member
Tink,

I tried to PM you but it said you'd

"exceeded their stored private messages quota and cannot accept further messages until they clear some space."

How old is your daughter?
 

TinkerBelleLuvr

Senior Member
Tink,

I tried to PM you but it said you'd

"exceeded their stored private messages quota and cannot accept further messages until they clear some space."

How old is your daughter?
16.

Dad tried keeping her at 10 and 14. I fought it in court and dad was found in contempt and assessed damages for me. He really manipulated her very well. She saw the light this summer.

There should be room now in my PMs
 
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gam

Senior Member
Last night, I recalled I had actually put five pills aside "just in case". So then after your suggestion, I emailed dad and told him to mail the meds to me. He responded and agreed. So thank you so much for that idea!

Gam, I thought about you because I think you may be very close to some of this, if not right in it. If you are in the county that starts with letter M, let me tell you it was initially supposed to be in front of George. She got ill, and the senior, retired Vivianno filled in. This was huge, and in our favor - given his reputation. When he was on the bench, I figured we had it. Nonetheless, I did not know exactly how hard he was gonna come down on dad! And I had one of the most brilliant and thoughtful attorneys I've ever seen. Wish I'd have known him from the beginning. Brilliant.

Kiddo has been just fine since returning home. Away from the influence of his dad, he seems to do okay and accept things and roll with them.
I thought you were in my court, interesting court for sure. You are so lucky the lovely George got ill and you got Vivianno. I'm betting when Vivianno was chewing your ex out, his face was the color of a beet, his veins were sticking out in his neck and the things he was saying on court record were unbelievable, lol. I have no clue how he gets away with saying some of that stuff on court record.

I have known him since I was little, my mom started out working for the Circuit Court, then moved to Probate, Vivianno was the Probate Judge at one time and her boss. I have worked on many of his campaigns as a kid. My one daughter had him as a Judge, while he can do some screwy things and things I am sure could be appealed, he does not tolerate parents playing games at all. He will arrest someone for contempt right in the middle of the hearing, he once arrested my daughters ex's lawyer for contempt. He scares the crap out of me and my one daughter that had him, but I was not happy when he retired, she got his daughter for a Judge, however her and her ex have not been to court in 5 years, so don't know how his daughter is as a Judge.

George, is still a Probate Judge, however she got sanctioned by the state and can only hear Mental division of Probate cases, she has been banned from Will and Estates cases. Huge mess at Probate Court since she became a Judge there, her and the other female Judge got into it, the other Judge whistleblowed on her to the state and it just went from there. That other Judge didn't even run again, she had enough of the misery with George. So what do they do with George, then send her over to Circuit to fill in, and give her all family cases. She does not know the first thing about family law. I won't even get into her lack in the Mental Division, have to deal with her for work.

My other daughter's case started last Aug and she got lovely George. Close to a dozen times in court in 7 months and not once did she make one darn decision on the case. She does that with all her cases, she lets each hearing go on and on, at the end of it, she either schedules a hearing with FOC or a Ref or kicks it back to FOC for some parenting, custody or support investigation. Some strange reason the same Ref gets all her cases, and that Ref is not one of the experienced Refs in that court. Another strange thing, the head Ref, David Elias(sp?)sits in on many of George's cases. I have seen neither of these things be the norm in over 10 years sitting in those courts. Brilliant lawyer after brilliant lawyer walks out of her courtroom shaking their head, most of them end up making deals outside the courtroom as there is no reason to go back and see the Ref or FOC, they have already made recommendations, done numerous investigations. Not sure she even reads the cases before hearing them, she sure don't remember facts about the case and she ignores the lawyers when they correct her that her fact is wrong. She insisted for 7 months that my daughters case was a divorce and it was not. She kept disagreeing with my daughters lawyer because as she said "in a divorce this and that happens". The case was not a divorce, dad had disappeared before child was born, reappeared 3 times and then disappeared for good when the child was 10 months old. Didn't show back up till the child was almost 3, child don't remember him, dad lives out of state. What a crap show George made out of this, drug it on way to long. Vivianno would have had it all done in a couple hearings, open and shut case.

Very lucky for you that she was ill, you would not have gotten anywhere with her. Lots of good about that court and their FOC, there is also lots of bad to, but once you know that court and the ones in it, you can always get somewhere pretty fairly with your case. That was until George showed up. Try to avoid her at all costs, matters little as your going to get the Ref making the decision anyways, so your shot is to convince that Ref. That Ref flip flops each time, one time she is really good and listens to the case, the next time she don't want to hear a thing and already has made her decision.

So to sum up(yep I know I'm long winded, lol), go through FOC as much as possible, if that is not working then try like heck to convince the Ref. If you object to the Ref, George will not make a decision but send you back to the Ref. Good news though the Ref seems to have flip flop decisions, so you have a chance the Ref will make a different decision when you see her again.
 

gam

Senior Member
One last thing if you ever need some info on that court or a particular Judge, Ref or FOC, you can always PM me. While I don't know all even on that court, I have spent major time in it for over 10 years now.
 

TinkerBelleLuvr

Senior Member
I'm in a different part of the state. My cases do NOT go to the referee anymore - straight to the judge. And she has the memory of an elephant which does NOT bode well for my X. She makes fair decisions so I do not complain. The referee we used to see would see us and immediately schedule a court date. Yeah, so much fun.
 

gam

Senior Member
I'm in a different part of the state. My cases do NOT go to the referee anymore - straight to the judge. And she has the memory of an elephant which does NOT bode well for my X. She makes fair decisions so I do not complain. The referee we used to see would see us and immediately schedule a court date. Yeah, so much fun.
Your case is in a smaller county, is it not? It runs similar to my Niece's smaller county, which is actually next to the county Kaizen's case is in. Making that point to you, cause I often tell you this side runs different, but the smaller courts on this side tend to run more like yours and not like the big courts on this side of the state.

I like some things they do better in my Niece's court, but then I again I like some things they do better in my court. If they combined the courts then I would have nothing to complain about, lol. My Niece no longer sees Refs anymore either, it's straight to the Judge and he too has a great memory that does not bode well for her X, she has had the same Judge for over 10 years. Not once have I ever seen that happen in my county in over 10 years, regardless of the case, you always see a Ref first, I'm sure there are cases that don't but I have yet to see one.

In my one daughter's case she was in court over 30 times the first year of the child's life. First hearing was at 2 months and because of FOC, Refs, objections and Judges each motion in her case often required 3 hearings. He had a pain in the butt lawyer, who was out to get the Judge assigned to the case, because that Judge was his Judge on his own divorce case, that the fool did himself. While in the end it all worked out for the best of the child, it cost a fortune in money and time. Now with this new Judge George, in my other daughters case, one motion is having up to 5-6 hearings and so far it has not worked out for the best of the child, would have never got the order that she got from the other Judges in this court.

But man what a crap FOC my Niece has, they spit out more terrible legal advice(yes they give legal advice that they are not suppose to give)and they do absolutely nothing on child support enforcement. My county if you do things right FOC is on that enforcement with one little phone call to them, no need to file motions, no need to write letters of complaints to them, they enforce child support orders.
 

TinkerBelleLuvr

Senior Member
Your case is in a smaller county, is it not? It runs similar to my Niece's smaller county, which is actually next to the county Kaizen's case is in. Making that point to you, cause I often tell you this side runs different, but the smaller courts on this side tend to run more like yours and not like the big courts on this side of the state.

I like some things they do better in my Niece's court, but then I again I like some things they do better in my court. If they combined the courts then I would have nothing to complain about, lol. My Niece no longer sees Refs anymore either, it's straight to the Judge and he too has a great memory that does not bode well for her X, she has had the same Judge for over 10 years. Not once have I ever seen that happen in my county in over 10 years, regardless of the case, you always see a Ref first, I'm sure there are cases that don't but I have yet to see one.

In my one daughter's case she was in court over 30 times the first year of the child's life. First hearing was at 2 months and because of FOC, Refs, objections and Judges each motion in her case often required 3 hearings. He had a pain in the butt lawyer, who was out to get the Judge assigned to the case, because that Judge was his Judge on his own divorce case, that the fool did himself. While in the end it all worked out for the best of the child, it cost a fortune in money and time. Now with this new Judge George, in my other daughters case, one motion is having up to 5-6 hearings and so far it has not worked out for the best of the child, would have never got the order that she got from the other Judges in this court.

But man what a crap FOC my Niece has, they spit out more terrible legal advice(yes they give legal advice that they are not suppose to give)and they do absolutely nothing on child support enforcement. My county if you do things right FOC is on that enforcement with one little phone call to them, no need to file motions, no need to write letters of complaints to them, they enforce child support orders.
My case is an anomoly to SOP because my case is about 18 inches thick. I've had fair decisions by the referees but in my case, because of the contempt issues, we go to the judge.
 

TinkerBelleLuvr

Senior Member
In Kaizen's case, the change of custody motion made by dad did NOT meet the level of change necessary to even have a hearing. And a child's "desire" to go with the other parent is NOT it. Nor is a child's age changing.
 

kaizen

Member
He's with dad now.

He was arrested this afternoon for assault and battery, with me being the victim. Therefore, for my safety they have released him to dad.

Is this a lifetime movie?? Please....someone change the channel to the Hallmark channel or something.

I just can't believe this and I'm all cried out.
 

LdiJ

Senior Member
He's with dad now.

He was arrested this afternoon for assault and battery, with me being the victim. Therefore, for my safety they have released him to dad.

Is this a lifetime movie?? Please....someone change the channel to the Hallmark channel or something.

I just can't believe this and I'm all cried out.
OMG....They released him to dad instead of sending him to juvie!?
 

kaizen

Member
OMG....They released him to dad instead of sending him to juvie!?

That pissed me off. He got just what he wanted in hanging with dad now. Dad called me once he got son and asked if he could come by and pick up son's phone for him. He also told me the charge was A&B because of "what I told the police".

I sincerely hope when this is done, he is sentenced to juvie because as stealth said - he needs a come to jesus moment. I could not agree more.
 

gam

Senior Member
That pissed me off. He got just what he wanted in hanging with dad now. Dad called me once he got son and asked if he could come by and pick up son's phone for him. He also told me the charge was A&B because of "what I told the police".

I sincerely hope when this is done, he is sentenced to juvie because as stealth said - he needs a come to jesus moment. I could not agree more.
Did the kid get what he wanted or did dad get what he wanted? I'm certainly for a come to jesus moment, however I would highly push that treatment be part of this come to jesus moment. Curious if he stopped taking the anti depressants while at dads?

Based on stuff you posted in the past, based on dad, based on the fact the kid was/is taking anti depressants, he needs to be fully checked out. I don't care what treatment he has had in the past or if he was currently being treated(obviously he was if he is on anti depressants), what he did is a whole new ball game. Juvie does not give these kids the treatment they need. Get on the phone to anyone that has recently treated him, see what help the can offer.

I personally would get my butt back to Circuit Court and present this to them and ask them to let you get this kid in some in-patient facility. Even if Judge George hears it, keep in mind she is a Probate Judge and she does the Mental division of Probate court, so that is a positive. There really is only 1 facility in the county that has proper in-patient treatment for children, not hard to run a search and find it.

Get yourself over to Turning Point, wonderful people over there, they can steer you the direction of some help for yourself and this situation.
 

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